Oh no you didn't!

By Annicita - About Me - E-mail this page - Add to My Favorites - Add to Blog List - See other blogs in Humor

Tuesday, September 25, 2012

In honor of the upcoming election

A bus of politicians is driving by a farm where a man lives alone. The bus driver, caught up in the beautiful scenery, loses control and crashes into the ditch. The man comes out and finding the politicians, buries them. The next day, the police are at the farm questioning the man. "So you buried... Sign in to see full entry.

Monday, September 24, 2012

Vampire Blood

To get everyone in the mood of halloween...... A vampire bat came flapping in from the night covered in fresh blood and parked himself on the roof of the cave to get some sleep. Pretty soon all the other bats smelt the blood and began hassling him about where he got it. He told them to go away and... Sign in to see full entry.

Last Night II

Patrice who also works in the kitchen said she noticed that I looked a lot better after seeing C. I then had my tarot cards read. Now some may say pooh or the work of the devil but this is what happened to me. She said to think of a question as I shuffled the deck. Wow! My mind kept trying to figure... Sign in to see full entry.

Genie in the Lamp

There was a guy walking down the street in San Fransisco, and he tripped over an old looking oil lamp. He picked it up and hid it under his jacket, because he thought it was priceless. While he was running to the antique shop to cash this puppy in, it rubbed against his shirt. *POOF* A genie popped... Sign in to see full entry.

Bless this food...

Everyone was seated around the table as the food was being served. When little Logan received his plate, he started eating right away. "Logan, wait until we say our prayer," his mother reminded him. "I don't have to," the little boy replied. "Of course you do," his mother insisted, "we say a prayer... Sign in to see full entry.

Sunday, September 23, 2012

Deep thoughts

Kids in the back seat cause accidents; accidents in the back seat cause kids. Sign in to see full entry.

Can I have some...

After having been served in a Las Vegas cocktail lounge, a real southern gentleman beckoned the waitress back and said quietly, "Miss, y'all sure are a luvly, luvly lady; can ah persuade y'all to give me a piece of ass?" "Lord, that's the most direct proposition I've ever had!" gasped the girl. Then... Sign in to see full entry.

Saturday, September 22, 2012

Mmmmm

Ahhhhh my pretty Lean closer Let me whisper in your ear Mmmmmmmm Lavender he thinks As he inhaled the scent on her throat.. Love you he whispers And clasps the side of her face Sign in to see full entry.

Now who's the dummy?

Bubba and Junior were standing at the base of a flagpole, looking up. A woman walked by and asked what they were doing. "We're supposed to find the height of the flagpole," said Bubba, "but we don't have a ladder." The woman took a wrench from her purse, loosened a few bolts, and laid the pole down.... Sign in to see full entry.

Ponder this...

1. Is there another word for synonym? 2. One tequila, two tequila, three tequila, floor. 3. Atheism is a non-prophet organization. 4. If man evolved from monkeys and apes, why do we still have monkeys and apes? 5. The main reason Santa is so jolly is because he knows where all the bad girls live. 6.... Sign in to see full entry.