Funeral Fun

By archiew - About Me - E-mail this page - Add to My Favorites - Add to Blog List - See other blogs in Humor

Saturday, June 5, 2004

Cremation Idea

When I die, I want my body to be wrapped in bacon, Canadian Bacon at that, so that I will smell good when they cremate me. Some may want to be wrapped in chicken strips, or roast beef, or, <SHUDDER> Soy, but, as for me, make it Canadian bacaon. Sign in to see full entry.

posted by archiew at 7:57 AM | add or view comments (15) | leave calling card | link to this | view only this entry

Saturday, May 29, 2004

Funerals as celebrations . . . .

Funerals are too somber. We need to lighten up about death. Death is an end, in a way, but a beginning in another way. For many religius people, death is the doorway into paradise, a life of rewards for a life well-lived. Or, for others, it is a door into a new life on Earth via incarnation. In any... Sign in to see full entry.

posted by archiew at 4:29 AM | add or view comments (2) | leave calling card | link to this | view only this entry

Wednesday, May 26, 2004

Before the cremation

At a funeral, I have seen family members throw a handful of dirt into the grave as they were leaving. Perhaps at a service prior to cremation of the deceased, each family member and friend could add kindling to the casket, to help send the dearly departed onto his final destination. Sign in to see full entry.

posted by archiew at 6:13 PM | add or view comments (2) | leave calling card | link to this | view only this entry

Tuesday, May 25, 2004

What a fun and interesting idea for a funeral . . .

Why not create a series of polls centered about the deceased? These could be filled out by those attending the funeral. Each poll could explore people's opinions on various aspects of the deceased's life. Polls could explore the following areas: Family Life The Deceased as a Husband The Deceased as... Sign in to see full entry.

posted by archiew at 6:28 AM | add or view comments (3) | leave calling card | link to this | view only this entry

Sunday, May 23, 2004

Last Dinner for the Dead

Wouldn't it be weird to go to your favorite restaurant one more time, after you die? Well, after being "fixed up" by the mortician, and in your finest "go-to-heaven outfit," your family and friends could take your corpse to your favorite restaurant, seat you with them a ta table, and order your... Sign in to see full entry.

posted by archiew at 9:08 AM | add or view comments (2) | leave calling card | link to this | view only this entry

Saturday, May 22, 2004

Travel Funeral . . .

In this most mobile of worlds, we have friends and relatives scattered all over the country, sometimes all over the world. Wouldn't it be great if there were an affordable way to put a corpse onto a flight, taking it to the far corners of the country, or the world, wherever friends and relatives may... Sign in to see full entry.

posted by archiew at 7:28 AM | add or view comments (1) | leave calling card | link to this | view only this entry

Friday, May 21, 2004

Guest Comment Booth

One of our local TV stations has a booth set up in a mall so that people can enter the booth and make comments. They enter, sit down, face a camera and push a button. At that point, they have a certain amoount of time to make a comment, which may later be shown on that station. Why not set up a... Sign in to see full entry.

posted by archiew at 5:53 AM | add or view comments (0) | leave calling card | link to this | view only this entry

Tuesday, May 18, 2004

To make a funeral or a viewing more interesting . . . . .

particularly a viewing, line up all the people at the viewing to pass by the open casket. As each person passes the deceased, they either kiss or slap the face, indicating how they felt about the person when the deceased was alive. A funeral home staff member could keep count of slaps vs. kisses and... Sign in to see full entry.

posted by archiew at 10:12 AM | add or view comments (4) | leave calling card | link to this | view only this entry

Friday, May 14, 2004

A funeral to remember . . . .

Families should hire photographers, as they do for weddings, to photograph funerals. This would provide closure to the loved one's life, with, hopefully, a lot of photos of those who loved and respected the deceased enough to attend the funeral to say farewell. And, yes, if it is an open casket... Sign in to see full entry.

posted by archiew at 5:47 AM | add or view comments (10) | leave calling card | link to this | view only this entry

Thursday, May 13, 2004

Fund-Raising to Pay for a Funeral

Another way to raise money for a funeral is to do what some schools and non-profits do: sell recipe books. One could collect all the favorite recipes of the deceased and organize them into a cookbook. Mine, for instance, could be titled, Archie's (May He Rest in Peace) Favorite Recipes, or, perhaps,... Sign in to see full entry.

posted by archiew at 5:28 AM | add or view comments (0) | leave calling card | link to this | view only this entry

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Next time you are at a funeral, llisten tothe comments around you.

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