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I'm so sorry that your SIL ranted. Maybe she needed someone to aim her anger at the loss. I think there is also a lot of jealousy mixed in there. Judy had two things in her life that she didn't - stability and love.
posted by
Annicita
on January 23, 2022 at 5:38 AM
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Re: Re:
posted by
Sherri_G
on January 21, 2022 at 11:07 AM
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Re: Wow
It seemed that for the entire time I have known her, she has seemed unhappy. Judy and I both had well-paying jobs, and she worked in a factory for a bit over minimum wage. We were happily married, and she was going from husband to husband to husband. That will make you unhappy. She made it clear that she did not think I was good enough for Judy most of the time. That is definitely a point-of-view thing. Judy and I always felt like we were happy to be together. The SIL never thought we should have been together in the first place. I will go with the fact that it was the dementia talking last night.
I have learned in life that if you listen and worry about what others think of you, you will never be happy. I stopped caring years ago, and I have been happy about 95% of my life.
Thanks for stopping in!
posted by
BigV
on January 21, 2022 at 10:59 AM
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Wow
It says a lot about a person's character when one makes such accusations. 
posted by
Sherri_G
on January 21, 2022 at 9:38 AM
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Pat_B
Thank you. I am not sure if the SIL can read with comprehension. I had offered her a free copy of the paperback, but she wouldn't take it. I've done my best to stay open and available to talk, but some people are locked in their own world, and they can't see beyond their tunnel vision.
posted by
BigV
on January 21, 2022 at 7:24 AM
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Re:
Thank you. As bad as it was, I haven't blocked her. I have had the same cell number since roughly 1998. I have made it widely known that I will listen if you need to talk. It is extremely easy to remember 989.444.1111.
If you need to talk, here am I.
posted by
BigV
on January 21, 2022 at 7:19 AM
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The SIL should read your written story about your first wife. It might
change her attitude in spite of her long-standing misperceptions and dementia. Seems like the slings and arrows just keep coming - hang in there.
posted by
Pat_B
on January 21, 2022 at 7:05 AM
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No one must not take notice of anyone suffering from even the first sign of dementia.
At times they see things entirely different to what they really are, as you know.
Although it is still a pain to hear someone suggest that someone who has cared for
a victim has not been perfect. I am sure you did your best.
posted by
C_C_T
on January 21, 2022 at 1:54 AM
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I guess it comes down to you have to 'look where it came from', then try to ignore it. Granted, those kind of things hurt, no matter if we realize it's not merited and the problem is with the her, not you. Maybe change your contact numbers so it doesn't happen again?
posted by
adnohr
on January 20, 2022 at 11:06 PM
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