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Tough decision to make one my parents went thru when my mom was in the nursing home... kept bringing her home but Dad couldn't get a wink of sleep caring for her so they finally capitalated and took her to the nursing home until she feel deep into the loving arms of Jesus one afternoon ... May 7, 2013 and we had a bedside service with the nurses and staff. We all ... that were there got to see her take her last breath. and we had been in and out of the room all day. She loved Jesus... was a charismatic Lutheran who went with our local Roman Catholics to Notre Dame in Indiana for a conference on the Holy Spirit one Summer. She raised the five of us and taught us well and we had LOTS of laughs with her... she was a riot... when we were little she'd take out her partial and skip it up our little arms like it was a dog saying "WOOF, WOOF, WOOF, WOOF, WOOF."
Be well you will know when it's time. 
posted by
KATE_M
on May 10, 2019 at 3:06 PM
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Kabu
Be a queen of your own decisions, on anything concerning Sir Wiley.
posted by
anib
on May 8, 2019 at 9:23 AM
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No it will be nice to feel that you have done your best.
When you feel at the end of your tether it will be practical but painful.
The good news is that most folk get grumpy when they reach 70.
I remember my Mother saying that my Grampy was grumpy and every one around me seem grumpy. They say I make them.
posted by
C_C_T
on May 8, 2019 at 8:03 AM
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When it comes to driving, a lot of etiquette goes out the window, sadly. So many people are in a hurry and willing to do whatever they feel is necessary to make things quicker.
posted by
FormerStudentIntern
on May 8, 2019 at 6:27 AM
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It's a shame none of them will come and visit and actually give you some time to enjoy.
You take care of you and don't let them dictate to you. 
posted by
Annicita
on May 7, 2019 at 8:56 PM
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Don't hurt yourself but you make up your own mind. It will become very clear to you when it is time. Love you both and have a sweet tomorrow just for fun. :)
posted by
geri
on May 7, 2019 at 6:05 PM
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Understood
posted by
BC-A
on May 7, 2019 at 5:08 PM
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Just because I've seen similar family dynamics, and since I've read
your posts and Wiley Coyote's over the years, I think I'm familiar enough with this situation to support you, whatever you decide. It worries me that you may just wear yourself out - physically and emotionally - if your dear husband's condition doesn't level out or improve a bit. Caregiver's fatigue is a real thing. I love that you're able to listen to the daughters' input as well. There is really no wrong decision here - he will be loved and cared for no matter which choice is made.
posted by
Pat_B
on May 7, 2019 at 1:45 PM
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Do you think it might start a "Family Feud" if you mentioned you're the one doing all the work, and putting him into long term care might ease their conscience, but bring to an end your home relationship?
posted by
Corbin_Dallas
on May 7, 2019 at 1:30 PM
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