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Re: Re: Re: Re:
be honest with him and yourself; but no drama and STAY CALM!! and put him before your adult children. They are abusing you, especially your daughter, and you deserve better from her. But hey, I am not much good at relationships anyway so my advice is probably up a creek without a paddle!
posted by
Kabu
on April 12, 2014 at 8:44 PM
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Well of course we all know what we would do , but we all are different and woman's advice would probably be better in this situation.
posted by
C_C_T
on April 12, 2014 at 12:31 AM
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I'm not good at giving advice. I can't even tell you what I would do in a similar situation. I do know that it is not good for you to continually be anxious. That sets up a pattern of a man wanting to absent himself from the situation.
posted by
TAPS.
on April 11, 2014 at 8:37 PM
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mneme
Well, the others have given you advice I couldn't possible improve on, especially since I always feel stymied when it come to matters of the heart, LOL...I just hope that things are going to work out for you, and that this is just a passing cloud in a sunny sky...
posted by
Nautikos
on April 11, 2014 at 6:43 PM
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Thanks Kabu.. (but how?).. I'm no good at this. Another sleepless night coming up... ho hum. xx
posted by
mneme
on April 11, 2014 at 3:16 PM
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then fight for him dear...you know your heart and I am here for support!!!
posted by
Kabu
on April 11, 2014 at 3:07 PM
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Re:
No, definitely not hanging on...if he continues to make me sad I will have to take a break. We're booked to go away on our own 12th May .. it will help, we have been better the more we've had to do. I know when he's restless, and my being housebound for two months has stopped us doing as much as we usually do. Things evolve...
posted by
mneme
on April 11, 2014 at 2:34 PM
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Re:
Yes Jimmy, I've wondered if he was losing interest... having confided in my son that I am worried about the effect of these forced separations on my relationship, he told me that 'the guy' isn't going to dump me and that he's lucky to have me. I think there's a compliment in there somewhere... smile. He offered to drive me over there tonight, to stay, but I think it's best to let my bloke rest after a long drive today and I don't want to make things worse.
posted by
mneme
on April 11, 2014 at 2:29 PM
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Hello Kabu... believe me I know what it's like being all alone in a bad relationship... yes I really love him, and I have been alone and I've been fine. I'll be fine again if it comes to it .. just would rather be with him than not.
posted by
mneme
on April 11, 2014 at 2:24 PM
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You must ask yourself dear, do I really love him or am I hanging on to what is a second best relationship because the alternative is being all alone!! Being alone is scary but I speak from my experience when I say that one can be truly alone in a bad relationship.
posted by
Kabu
on April 11, 2014 at 1:31 PM
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I wouldn't say you were stupid, but rather hopeful. There's obviously something about this man that keeps you 'hanging on,' unless it's something else entirely. I don't want to overstep my bounds here, but years ago I had a girlfriend who put me through similar circumstances. Nothing involving children, but the lack of support and the lack of desire to spend more quality time with me lead me to one conclusion: she was losing interest. Although one part of me felt that the relationship was worth salvaging, another part of me said to cut my losses now before even more emotions were used up and crushed. I'm not suggesting that you do that, but I would begin to get into the mindset that maybe . . . maybe . . . this particular relationship is no longer worth the emotional stress it is obviously putting on you. You're obviously intelligent, and I think you'll know what to do when the time comes . . . 
posted by
JimmyA
on April 11, 2014 at 1:11 PM
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