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Kabu
Exactly, this is not about 'women's power' it is about respect going both ways. Anyone using dirty language before another is disrespecting them to the fullest.
posted by
Justi
on November 21, 2012 at 7:48 PM
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Straightforward
Perhaps I did not make myself clear. This is totally about reciprocity of consideration. The point of Curt's daughter is that my father was a man who treated all with the consideration he would expect toward himself. If he was or in this case his daughter, was treated badly in this instance very badly then the men would also be treated very badly to the point of true reciprocity. With appropriate codes of behavior being inherent people will in general behave better. This has never and will never apply to all, but it applies to the majority. We no longer have anything near that in America, we once did. You do not treat anybody regardless of who or why any particular way, you treat people according to the code, if they do not do so then they do not fall into line for the same.
posted by
Justi
on November 21, 2012 at 7:47 PM
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Justi, I find it difficult to fit into the binaries of conservatism or
globalisation and consumerism. I think we must find that - I won't call ti middle line cos it's another line altogether - that set of lines of behaviour that give value to another human being, whoever he or she may be, not just if she is Curt's daughter. What say?
posted by
Straightforward
on November 21, 2012 at 6:30 PM
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An excellent post darling. Equality for woman I didn't see as a reason
for rudeness but then when I see how amoral society is I see that there is no respect for self hence no respect from others.
posted by
Kabu
on November 21, 2012 at 4:58 PM
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UtahJay
That is totally remarkable. Thanks for sharing that.
posted by
Justi
on November 21, 2012 at 4:09 PM
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C.C.
Yes it is the same here. In the past a neighbor move into the neighborhood I would take over a move-in meal or some sweets. Today you see if they will answer the door, etc.,
posted by
Justi
on November 21, 2012 at 4:08 PM
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adnohr
This is what I love so much about your blog. You are showing how one teaches children good manners, self and for others respect, love and pride in growing in a proper manner. It is so good to see this in action in both instances.
posted by
Justi
on November 21, 2012 at 4:06 PM
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BC-A
Yes this is a great problem today. Those over 50 are often paying the way of the 18 plus for some time and the marketplace takes into account the amount they spend and treat them as the aces in the deck when it is the 50+ paying the bill winds being the 2 of clubs. I say 50 plus should stop paying out the kazoo for these young ones to have things they need for work for before owning them.
posted by
Justi
on November 21, 2012 at 4:04 PM
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Nautikos
I agree it is a complex topic and I feel it should be addresses. I also agree that at the heart of 'good manners' is the issue of making one another feed considered; however, that is difficult since our culture has strayed so far from the norm that who knows what that behavior is. 
posted by
Justi
on November 21, 2012 at 4:00 PM
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JimmyA
I agree about the parents of past would not have tolerated today's teens. However I do think this is a very complicated and lengthy subject. It covers so much more than whether we stand until Papa sits at table. It has had a tremendous effect on our school system, our work place behavior, our religion and our politics. It touches differently all the areas of our lives in a gang mentality.
posted by
Justi
on November 21, 2012 at 3:58 PM
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lustorlove
I know what inequity to women is. I worked in the late 50's and 60's it was terrible. Giving a seat to women was a note of respect for those who needed protection. I still need protection. I love it that my husband opens doors, pulls out my chair and pays for my dinner. I want his respect for my being a woman and he wants me to be able to do anything I want to and can do. My mother was a business woman, my household had no inequity in it, yet my father was a total gentleman and I want the same.
posted by
Justi
on November 21, 2012 at 3:53 PM
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Although your argument was somewhat lengthy and involved, the message is fairly simple . . . good manners permiate good manners. And the "Golden Rule" is even simpler than that. I myself have no idea what happened to general manners anymore, but since it seems to get worse with every generation, I'm gonna go out on a limb here and once again blame some of today's parents. My parents would have never tolerated some of the behavior these kids and teens display today!
posted by
JimmyA
on November 21, 2012 at 12:56 PM
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Justi
A very interesting post about a very complex topic, and one could write about forever! I agree with you in most respects - let me just add that to me the essence of good manners resides in showing consideration for others! But that works both ways, of course - I also demand that others are considerate of me...
posted by
Nautikos
on November 21, 2012 at 10:21 AM
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Yes, there has been quite the moral decay over the years.
posted by
FormerStudentIntern
on November 21, 2012 at 9:33 AM
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I hate walking behind a bunch of teenagers and every other word is the "F" word. But as far as manners and men standing and offering a woman a seat on the bus etc that was brought on by the women wanting equality they dont want men to open doors and pull out the chair any more.
posted by
Lanetay
on November 21, 2012 at 8:34 AM
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Justi
In my field the desirable marketing age for all media’s the 18 to 49 year olds. 18s are treated more as responsible important customers than the over 50s. Of course this is a very narrow example for what you’re writing about. However it means that I agree love. BC-A, Bill’s R®st
posted by
BC-A
on November 21, 2012 at 5:45 AM
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You hit the nail on the head, Justi, when you write "You see the code of respect was on them to behave well for their own honor." Lack of self-respect begets rudeness. Self-respect can only be earned, not handed to one on a silver platter. This is a very good, thought-provoking post!
posted by
adnohr
on November 21, 2012 at 1:32 AM
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Once no-one had much at all Justi only the upper-class, now everyone wants more and sharing is not viable, who wants little leftovers that neighbours so willingly gave and appreciated when it was offered. I have had neighbours, new ones for fifteen years and they have only just started to acknowledge me.
posted by
C_C_T
on November 20, 2012 at 11:46 PM
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I see this on the media Justi, but not so much here...Most everyone smiles and waves, all the neighbors know each others names, but we know it is coming.
posted by
UtahJay
on November 20, 2012 at 10:42 PM
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