Go to MY PERCEPTIVE REFLECTION!!
- Add a comment
- Go to THANK YOU BLOGGERS FOR ALL YOUR SUPPORT AND KINDNESS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Thank you all so very much for your kind words,
I was going to respond to you indivually but there isn't much point...when what I want to say is to you all....
your comments give me the strentgh to go on....your thoughtfulness, kind words, caring nature....honest comments, advice, you have gave me so much....I can not thank you all enough...
I am not feeling like myself at all.....but I will in time..I am helping myself, I wont dwell ...I just wanted to express how much I appreciate you all....
THANK YOU
posted by
_Symphony_
on February 24, 2005 at 3:46 AM
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You're going to be getting stronger and more in control every day
now that you have asked for help . Yes, it will take some time, and it won't always seem like it, but when it is rough, you know now that you can make decisions that are good for you, you can do what you need to do to be safe, and there are friends and family to back you up, and sometimes to be your champions. If you can find an Alanon group--for people who have lived with or are living with alcoholics-- I suggest you commit yourself to going to at least six meetings. The more you learn about dealing with it, the more power and control you'll have over your decisions. You are stronger than the bullies: they are afraid and weak and wrong. It will probably never be worse than the moment before you picked up the phone and called for help!
posted by
Ciel
on February 24, 2005 at 2:06 AM
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I had a female friend who came from an abusive family and married an abusive man. She was caught in a circle. She got help in support groups and a psychiatrist. It took some effort but she broke the circle.
posted by
ThomasFranklin
on February 23, 2005 at 8:19 PM
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Symphony, I wish you could post every half hour to express your feelings.
I have been through your experience and I can tell you you did the right thing! For you and for the kids. It will get better. He will get better, because now he has a higher power to deal with. It's easy beating up on women and little kids. Not so easy pulling that on the courts. I'm sorry!
posted by
kingmi
on February 23, 2005 at 5:13 PM
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Symph, you are very brave for sharing all this with us, and the same
strength will see you through this difficult time. Then you'll be able to look back and sigh in relief. I hope the best for you.
posted by
ARGUS
on February 23, 2005 at 4:23 PM
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Symphony,
I've been thinking a lot about your situation, and how similar it is to mine. How strong you've been in the face of such tremendous challenge. You are such an inspiration! I don't know how I'd manage if on top of everything else my husband was also physically abusive.
You are scared and lonely, which is understandable. But try to remember that you did not make that man the way he is. He did it to himself! You didn't put the bottle to his lips. You didn't make him scream, punch, or break the law. It is his responsibility alone to set right what he has destroyed.
As for his mother:
I don't know what the laws are in the UK, but here in the US behavior like that would be considered harrassing and abusive. If she shows up causing trouble again, I would calmly but firmly tell her to leave. If she doesn't leave on her own, call the police. It's your home, and you don't have to allow her in it!
Remember that: It is YOUR home, the home you have created for yourself and your children.
I probably shouldn't offer advice, considering the position I'm in myself. It would just be so good to see you happy and at peace.
Take care love,
M.
posted by
myrrhage_
on February 23, 2005 at 12:40 PM
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Symphony take care of yourself and the babies. I've been there. Exercise and get fresh air. Don't open the door again for him or his mother. Tell them they are not welcome and with the door closed tell them the police are on their way. He won't want to spend another day with the gay boys in the drunk tank overnight for a while.His mother makes the problem worse. Don't call her names or even talk to her. Tell her to get him into some program to dry him up.
posted by
the-loanlady
on February 23, 2005 at 11:07 AM
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He is with you, Symphony...
And so am I.
posted by
lovelyladymonk
on February 23, 2005 at 8:22 AM
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Write an advice comlumn for women in your situation. You'd be great at it.
posted by
Renigade
on February 23, 2005 at 8:02 AM
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You can get through this. Try to get all the support you can around you. Emotional abuse IS abuse.
posted by
Arlene_the_Lovely
on February 23, 2005 at 7:35 AM
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Symphony...
I'm glad you're able to at least write with us again. Good for your mom! You need closer, more physical support as well. Hugs!!
posted by
RedHeadedGypsy
on February 23, 2005 at 7:21 AM
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SYMPHONY
When things go wrong as they sometimes will
When the road your trudging seems all uphill
When the funds are low and the debts are high
And you want to smile but you have to sigh,
When care is pressing you down a bit-
Rest if you must but don`t you quit.
Success is failure turned inside out,
The silver tint of the clouds of doubt,
And you never can tell how closer you are,
It may be near when it seems afar,
So, stick to the fight when you`re hardest hit-
It,s when things go wrong that you mustn`t quit.(Author Unknown)
posted by
WileyJohn
on February 23, 2005 at 7:20 AM
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posted by
Tanoolicious
on February 23, 2005 at 6:31 AM
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thank you so much, roofpig
I wish I felt as confident...
posted by
_Symphony_
on February 23, 2005 at 5:49 AM
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thank you....AnnAndBenjamin
posted by
_Symphony_
on February 23, 2005 at 5:48 AM
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thank you so much, Ariala
posted by
_Symphony_
on February 23, 2005 at 5:48 AM
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thank you, Moondawg
posted by
_Symphony_
on February 23, 2005 at 5:48 AM
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thnak you so much, Jemmie211
posted by
_Symphony_
on February 23, 2005 at 5:47 AM
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thanks Original_Influence ...I hope so
posted by
_Symphony_
on February 23, 2005 at 5:47 AM
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thank you so much Tapsel-T
posted by
_Symphony_
on February 23, 2005 at 5:47 AM
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thank you scriber
posted by
_Symphony_
on February 23, 2005 at 5:46 AM
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its ok, Tanoolicious
you wasn't to know and there wasn't anything you could have done anyway....so don't worry
posted by
_Symphony_
on February 23, 2005 at 5:46 AM
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It's an obstacle, not a wall. You'll either get around or destroy it from your path, but you won't be held behind it forever. You're a strong person, Sym, any and all of us can see that. Trust me, you'll get through it all right. :-)
posted by
roofpig
on February 23, 2005 at 5:26 AM
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It will get better and best pretty soon. Hang on.-------------------
(Ann)
posted by
A-and-B
on February 23, 2005 at 5:12 AM
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posted by
Ariala
on February 23, 2005 at 5:03 AM
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It's too bad that his mother
can't realize he's the one that has the problem and try to help him.
Hang with it Symphony, your time is coming.
posted by
Moondawg
on February 23, 2005 at 4:57 AM
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You've said this to me...
If you ever need to talk...you know where to find me. *hugs*hugs*
posted by
Jemmie211
on February 23, 2005 at 4:49 AM
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Stay strong...this will become a bad memory one day!
posted by
Original_Influence
on February 23, 2005 at 4:41 AM
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{{{{{HUGS}}}}}
posted by
TAPS.
on February 23, 2005 at 3:59 AM
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Symp--you have a lot of good wishes, including mine. love scriber
posted by
scriber
on February 23, 2005 at 3:55 AM
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I just realized why I missed the previous post.... I checked the timing, and it would be around the time I was asleep.... but im still very sorry for missing the post
posted by
Tanoolicious
on February 23, 2005 at 3:51 AM
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At this moment i feel like the lowest of low people on the face of the earth... how could I have missed your previous post about the arrest? Im so so soooooooooooooooo sorry .... you know im here for you if you need anything {{{HUGS}}}
posted by
Tanoolicious
on February 23, 2005 at 3:48 AM
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