My diagnosis: MDD, PTSD, ADD, SAD, BPD, & ...

By myfirstry - About Me - E-mail this page - Add to My Favorites - Add to Blog List - See other blogs in Journal

Friday, February 1, 2019

overheard words

Things are overheard all the time. Taken out of context all the time. We do not always know when someone hears what we say or how they perseve them. It's unfortunate that we cannot explain certain things. Especially, when we cannot understand them ourselves. I do not like this situation and cannot... Sign in to see full entry.

Monday, January 28, 2019

shaking but gotta go

So nervous about this visit, fingers crossed I don't scare her away! she has been my best friend since I was 17! We have drifted apart for the past couple years and she is coming here! Hasn't been here since 2015! I am so nervous! I love you EM! ~EXHALE Sign in to see full entry.

I SAY IT'S THE COMPANY I AM KEEPING...

I have always been easily influenced. maybe not always but most of the time. I don't have good memories so I base a lot of what I say on what I have been told by my husband. I am finding that what he has been telling me about myself isn't always the truth, not only is it his opinion at times it's a... Sign in to see full entry.

Saturday, January 5, 2019

A new approach...

We’ve had several good days. Then this almost happens Our 14-year-old calls our cat, Tom, at our bedroom doorway. When they are out of earshot he says,...that a name of your ex or something? (Tom and Jerry, anyone?) Usually I would either get upset and it would cause argument or at the least... Sign in to see full entry.

Friday, January 4, 2019

It's an addiction...

I told him I would stop snooping, because really what's the point? I have caught him in so many lies I found myself looking for more truths. I told him day before yesterday I would stop my "research" because either way I was here to stay so there was really no point. I guess I was only trying to... Sign in to see full entry.

Wednesday, December 26, 2018

as long as I don't mind...

It seems as long as I don't mind being treated any kind of way, all is well. We only have a problem when I speak up for what I believe in. For example today as I am trying to clean the living room my youngest cannot find his Nerf bullets. I stop and help him look. After a good 10 to 15 minutes, I... Sign in to see full entry.

Saturday, December 22, 2018

Breakin' my own rules...

I set guildlines and rules for myself yesterday. If it isn't Healthy, Heartfelt, Happy or Helpful I am not to engage in such activities or discussions. I have already broken that rule on the first freakin' day. I knew it wasn't going to be easy. I started asking myself, am I here to love in this... Sign in to see full entry.

Friday, December 21, 2018

I am not paranoid...

Hey, I've been screwed over so many times before. I worry sure, mistrust, don't we all, wonder about things, ever single day! I do give the benefit of the doubt, well I used to. I never really obsessed too much unless I had a "feeling" or a "reason". I do have just cause for these inquiries. So, I... Sign in to see full entry.

Monday, December 17, 2018

Anger is so bad...

I get so angry with myself for being so naive. I cannot believe the lies. How can I be so stupid. It's been going on for so long. I am in too deep. Now they want to make it up to me? Not sure how this works. Trapped, is about the only word that comes to mind....freakin' trapped....well DAMN! Sign in to see full entry.

you twist things...

I am told I am always twisting things. What I am doing is clarifying what they are saying. I may paraphrase or ask them to repeat what they are saying. Something along those lines, that is when I am told I am twisting things. It's maddening. Especially when I agree and say they do the same thing or... Sign in to see full entry.

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