Diva's Diatribes

Friday, September 2, 2005

Saying Goodbye, again

In another week I'll be getting on a plane and flying to the place my lover called home for many years. He used to tell me stories about his life there and sent me pictures of different spots he wanted us to see together. He spoke often about the wonderous world beneath the ocean when he dived. He... Sign in to see full entry.

Sunday, June 19, 2005

Happy Daddy's Day honey

I wasn't planning on posting today. I have been directed here, very clearly and firmly so here I am. Happy Daddy's Day honey. I know you wish you were still here, I can feel your saddness so clearly today. I can hear you say over and over that you're sorry you're gone. But please honey, don't be... Sign in to see full entry.

Monday, June 6, 2005

When does it get better?

Those that read my posts might think that I am having trouble with grief, that I haven't "moved on" and coped well enough. From one perspective that could be true........it's been months and I still have moments when the pain is so fresh is makes me gasp. So tell me, how do you cope? What takes this... Sign in to see full entry.

Tuesday, April 12, 2005

Hit by a car - Happy Tuesday !

Last night I got home from work and was in bed by 8pm, feeling yukky. I wasn't sure if I was coming down with something or it was my body telling me that it was full to the brim with emotional strain. The past few days have been stressful, coping with my lover's birthday and all the memories that... Sign in to see full entry.

Wednesday, March 16, 2005

To where you are

Who can say for certain Maybe you're still here I feel you all around me Your memory's so clear Deep in the stillness I can hear you speak You're still an inspiration Can it be That you are mine Forever love And you are watching over me from up above Fly me up to where you are Beyond the distant... Sign in to see full entry.

Sunday, March 6, 2005

One more day

Writing about grief here isn't an effort to solicit sympathy, but simply to verbalize the pain in the hope that it may be eased somewhat. I have lost others in my life, grandparents and friends and have coped. I have always been a survivor, able to get through it, not matter what was thrown at me.... Sign in to see full entry.

Tuesday, February 15, 2005

Some prayers please

Some of you who stop by to read my posts know that I lost the love of my life not long ago. Shortly before that my Dad, depressed by his quality of life due to some health issues, tried (thankfully unsucessfully) to take his life. The past few months have been a struggle that I wasn't sure, at... Sign in to see full entry.

Monday, February 7, 2005

A voice in the night

Something very spooky happened this weekend. I had been sleeping and around 4:30 am started to wake up since 5am is usually when I wake up for work. I was in that half dream state, and heard someone say my name. Very clearly, with a bit of an accent (Scottish, Irish, British, not really sure). It... Sign in to see full entry.

Thursday, January 27, 2005

In the dark of night

He comes to me In the night As I am in that sweet place between sleep and wakefulness Whispers "Hi honey, it's me" And gathers me in Tucking my head into that spot on his shoulder Made just for me Feelings of peace and joy Sweet contentment I wake To find he's not there, it was just a dream Reality... Sign in to see full entry.

Monday, December 27, 2004

Life's journey

This Christmas visit by my parents illustrated the dramatic decline in my Dad's mental and physical facilities. He is not a young man (81) but has, up to a few years ago, enjoyed robust health and looked decades younger than his years. Then a few things happened. He was given a blood transfusion... Sign in to see full entry.

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