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Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Goldiec,
She was the second, the only girl, with three brothers. Her father was one of those who didn't think girls should bother with education. His death allowed her to go to college anyway. She got her bachelor's degree in home economics, fell just a few credits short of a degree in biology.
Her mother was a tiny-minded woman who hated her for being born, and 'ruining her life.'
posted by
Ciel
on January 25, 2021 at 12:46 PM
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Re: Re: Re: Re: Goldiec,
Ciel, did your Mom come from a big family?
posted by
Goldiec
on January 25, 2021 at 11:30 AM
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Re: Re: Re: Re: Goldiec,
Ciel, I'm so sorry about what happened to your Mom. Life can be so hard.
posted by
Goldiec
on January 25, 2021 at 11:29 AM
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Re: Re: Re: Goldiec,
It means I am acting through her imperatives, her solutions, her values. It is carrying being like her to an extreme where, in fact, I am less like myself.
To her, a clean house was the most important thing. Loving her family, caring about our feelings and our own personalities was not in her catalog of Most Important Things. She suffered from Complex PTSD which is what you get from emotional abandonment and abuse in childhood. Her parents were awful! And left her unable to experience, let alone teach what she didn't know.
posted by
Ciel
on January 25, 2021 at 8:29 AM
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Re: Re: Goldiec,
Ciel, what does it mean when you channel your Mom. Does that mean you are like her?
posted by
Goldiec
on January 25, 2021 at 7:41 AM
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Re: Annicita,
posted by
Ciel
on January 25, 2021 at 7:33 AM
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Re: Kabu,
Realizing I could donate stuff, not have to throw it out, all the little things I personally don't need, but they could be useful... That was a boon for my decluttering efforts!
posted by
Ciel
on January 25, 2021 at 7:32 AM
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Re: Goldiec,
My mom was fastidious, and tended to scrub things a bit too much, too vigorously, until they actually wore down. I channel her now and then, but not enough to feel harried. And I don't do daily loads of laundry because the utilities bill is high enough as it is! But then, I have way too many socks and all, so I don't have to keep up that often!
posted by
Ciel
on January 25, 2021 at 7:30 AM
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Re: Re: I am crossing my fingers that it does just that.
posted by
Sherri_G
on January 25, 2021 at 7:30 AM
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Re: sassyass,
Let's hope it comes early this year!
posted by
Ciel
on January 25, 2021 at 7:27 AM
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Re: Pat,
I'm thinking that ennui is the effect of the emotional exhaustion that comes when we finally can begin to lower defenses, to relax. And the benefits of hermiting are not over for some months to come, with the pandemic. Just... adults are back in the Oval Office, and the fever-dreams of the previous administration are declining. It was the tension of fear that kept us upright, and now we can lie down and rest.
posted by
Ciel
on January 25, 2021 at 7:26 AM
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Re: CCT,
You are still in the midst of the pandemic's worst days--I hope you are staying safe! We, here, should not relax yet either, but many of us have emerged from the political fever dreams of the past 4+ years, and that is a tremendous relief!
posted by
Ciel
on January 25, 2021 at 7:22 AM
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posted by
Annicita
on January 23, 2021 at 4:31 PM
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I believe I understand. With de-cluttering the house, I am keeping objects that sooth , calm me, and while I love walls and shelves filled with what I love, I hate useless clutter.
posted by
Kabu
on January 23, 2021 at 1:07 PM
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I'm always cleaning, de-cluttering, and taking the recycling and garbage out. I love my house to smell clean and to be neat. I never go to bed with a dish in the sink and I wash all my dirty clothes every day. It can be exhausting because I do not live alone. I'm not sure what this says about me but I do try to keep things neat and tidy. It's been so cold here but we do have doves by our bird feeder. They come each day to get their treats. 
posted by
Goldiec
on January 23, 2021 at 10:39 AM
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Spring is my favorite season.
All of the new life is hard to not appreciate. Our yard is filled with Doves daily. Of course, I do offer them some very nice treats to get them to want to revisit. They seem to love grain, sunflower seeds, pasta, and dried worms. We sometimes throw our leftover rice and pasta near the feeders where the birds and fur babies snap it up by the end of the day.
posted by
Sherri_G
on January 23, 2021 at 9:16 AM
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There's a word that fits what's going on these days - ennui.
I've been pretty whelmed lately myself, in hunker down mode. I'm a bit worried that I'm getting too comfortable just hermiting through the weeks.
posted by
Pat_B
on January 23, 2021 at 8:50 AM
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Good for you I have not had that stimulus yet.
posted by
C_C_T
on January 23, 2021 at 7:40 AM
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