Go to From The Observation Deck
- Add a comment
- Go to You can "like," and you can "love" . . . but can you do both?
Re:
Thanks, sam. I'm sorry to hear that about your ex, but something tells me that might be the exception. I believe more people may love their spouse but not really like them, if such a thing is possible! 
posted by
JimmyA
on April 30, 2013 at 8:01 AM
| link to this | reply
This post made great sense to me! I believe I just liked my ex but never really loved him! sam 
posted by
sam444
on April 29, 2013 at 11:07 PM
| link to this | reply
Re:
There ya go, Annicita! That's what I like to read . . . another corroborator, and the sounds of another happy marriage! 
posted by
JimmyA
on April 27, 2013 at 8:20 AM
| link to this | reply
Oh yes! I love and like my hubby....
posted by
Annicita
on April 26, 2013 at 12:01 AM
| link to this | reply
Re: Another point: you can occasionally not like someone you love
That's probably true, Ciel. There are times when certain couples I know appear to really dislike each other, although they still give the impression of loving each other. Like I wrote, I really and truly love my wife, but I like her as well. I hope a day never comes when either of those emotions change for me . . . 
posted by
JimmyA
on April 25, 2013 at 1:10 PM
| link to this | reply
Another point: you can occasionally not like someone you love
and you can continue to love someone who is toxic to you, but at a safe distance. Few marriages, I think, have a continual, steady stream of liking, even though the loving is unquestionable.
posted by
Ciel
on April 25, 2013 at 8:30 AM
| link to this | reply
Re:
Thanks, Sinome. Like I wrote, I'm sure there were many a relationship out there where one or the other emotion was missing, and the relationship suffered somewhat as a result. Always good to find corroboration on these things . . .
posted by
JimmyA
on April 25, 2013 at 8:04 AM
| link to this | reply
Re: JimmyA
Well, that is a poser, Sir Wiley! And I have a feeling that just about everyone on the planet has been in that situation at least once in their lives ( except for possibly the divorce part ). I honestly can't imagine loving and liking someone and marrying them, only to find out later that those feelings were one-sided! I guess apologies are in order . . .
posted by
JimmyA
on April 25, 2013 at 8:01 AM
| link to this | reply
Re: Jimmy
I can understand that, Naut. There are certain people out there who, despite the handful of "good" qualities they may have, there's just something about them that you just can't get on board with, and you know you will never love them, never mind like them! I guess it is a broad range to cover, and we all have our opinions about what makes a person likable, and what may not . . .
posted by
JimmyA
on April 25, 2013 at 7:58 AM
| link to this | reply
Re:
That might be true, C C T. There's a good chance that liking someone first could lead to loving them, but it could be rare the other way around! As I've gotten older, there are times when I look back upon certain relationships and ask myself "Did I really like that person?" The answer is usually no . . . 
posted by
JimmyA
on April 25, 2013 at 7:55 AM
| link to this | reply
Re:
As they probably should, FSI. And although there is a distinction between the two, I feel they must both be present in any relationship. Regardless of your dating history, they must have been a factor for whoever you may have been with . . . 
posted by
JimmyA
on April 25, 2013 at 7:52 AM
| link to this | reply
Re:
Well that's not really fair, lustor. The "other brain," as you so aptly put it, doesn't really worry about loving or liking someone. I'm talking strictly emotional here, not physical. With my wife as my partner and my best friend, all of the "physical" that follows is just another way of expressing that bond. I feel that the two simply must go hand in hand . . .
posted by
JimmyA
on April 25, 2013 at 7:50 AM
| link to this | reply
Re: yes
Thanks, jean. I didn't think I would get too many people who might actually disagree . . .
posted by
JimmyA
on April 25, 2013 at 7:46 AM
| link to this | reply
I totally agree with you :-) Liking whom you love is the key for a happy relationship... Great post! xoxoxo
posted by
Sinome
on April 24, 2013 at 9:37 PM
| link to this | reply
JimmyA
So what do you do with these two qualities and then find out she didn't like you from day one, and divorces you? 
posted by
WileyJohn
on April 24, 2013 at 7:00 PM
| link to this | reply
Jimmy
Of course one can like people without loving them, and I also think its possible to love people in spite of disliking some of their attributes; but for me, at least, it would be impossible to love someone about whom I liked nothing...
posted by
Nautikos
on April 24, 2013 at 3:19 PM
| link to this | reply
Probably best to like someone I think but one does not realise it until one grows older.
posted by
C_C_T
on April 24, 2013 at 12:33 PM
| link to this | reply
I do not have much of a dating history. In reading this post, I agree that there is a distinction between "like" and "love." Great marriages that I am thinking of have the couples feeling both liking and love.
posted by
FormerStudentIntern
on April 24, 2013 at 9:22 AM
| link to this | reply
I guess I never met anyone that liked or loved me enough, even though I have great qualities they just couldnt see past the other brain that they used to think with
posted by
Lanetay
on April 24, 2013 at 9:09 AM
| link to this | reply
yes
right on
posted by
jeansaw
on April 24, 2013 at 8:45 AM
| link to this | reply