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Very wise I feel it is to get it all down on paper...You describe so well what happened all those years ago.
posted by
FormerStudentIntern
on December 29, 2012 at 11:54 AM
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UtahJay
Good for you getting it all down on paper and release the dam of thoughts that crucify. I know a part of what that is like but I wasn't at war, except the Cold War in Europe where my job was with a salvage crew picking up the bodies of pilots killed by mechanical errors. So I learned about blood on the ground and body parts up in the tree branches where planes guided themselves to crash in a forest.My trade actually was 'Airframe Tech' that got picked to do a job other than what we were trained for. 55 years after that I fought for a pension for PTSD, caused by that work, and had years of psychotherapy because I came to realize there was something wrong with me. So my mind & memories made me crazy, and I've been working on that for 45 years anyway. Never cured but well medicated. God Bless you my friend.
posted by
WileyJohn
on December 28, 2012 at 6:12 PM
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Mariss
We hide it because if we say we never shot at anyone, then they do not want to know how many you killed, what hell you saw and you can move on to more civilized conversations pertaining to the weather and such. Just doing this I worry the dreams will come, but my counselor says the more I talk about it the better things will get. Personally I think she is full of it, but she has got me this far.
posted by
UtahJay
on December 28, 2012 at 6:07 PM
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Mariss
posted by
UtahJay
on December 28, 2012 at 6:01 PM
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It was the worst of times for me...we were taught that the evil of
Communists were coming....Blah Blah...it wasn't until I understood conscription and I saw boys I had known forever return...different. I did not agree with the war but I admired those who fought and hated to see them suffer. Told that Agent Orange symptoms that Cancer, death, and PTSD didn't exist.... we were even told that our boys our men were kept safely away from the fighting.
posted by
Kabu
on December 28, 2012 at 4:20 PM
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Why hide it, when everyone knows that war was hellish? Overcoming is best. God be With You. P.S. I never meant to imply that rabble I wrote about in my poem was Special Forces; I doubt most of them have any sense of honor or others to speak of. I meant Special in the sense of low intellegence and put that in the poem after I saw I needed to clarify what I meant.
posted by
mariss9
on December 28, 2012 at 2:51 PM
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I think writing about these feeling makes it easier to forget and deal with all what happened. Even thought I hear that these things live with the person and never goes away. Your poem is very strong and reflects deep emotions with a wound in the heart. I hope you learn to forget 
posted by
Chuck_E_Ibrahim
on December 28, 2012 at 1:39 PM
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You need not tell me Jay I was nearly posted to Korea.I relived that fear.There is no glory in killing less in being killed. I have had too many relatives trampled into the mud.
Yours was an unappreciated sacrifice, but sadly most are after a very short time .
I don't know if reliving the horror is therapeutic or if your nightmares are an attempt by your mind to solve a long standing trauma. I think the latter but I may be wrong. I have found as one grows older it is easier to come to terms with disturbing thoughts, I hope this applies to everyone. Be Lucky. 
posted by
C_C_T
on December 28, 2012 at 12:05 PM
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Utah
Very powerful! And thanks for what you did, and for sharing this...
posted by
Nautikos
on December 28, 2012 at 11:42 AM
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