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Adnohr, thanks so much for this compliment!
posted by
Ciel
on June 4, 2011 at 12:21 AM
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Kabu, I do try to make a life that works despite the twists and warps
and while some days I feel I'll never outlast the damage, somehow I can't quit trying.
I'm glad for your example, that you didn't give up, despite disappointment and tribulation along the way.
posted by
Ciel
on June 4, 2011 at 12:21 AM
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Wow Ciel - you are some writer! Through your words, I felt that rejection to my toes. It was a bit uncanny.
posted by
adnohr
on June 3, 2011 at 7:26 PM
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I think you and yes taps as well reading her comment and yours back...I
think that you are both wonderful People. Despite an unfair Childhood you have forged ahead and made your own life....never using the excuse of what was his problem to ruin the rest of your lives. I admire that so much.
My own Dad was wonderful and adored me all his life... I had a secure love filled Childhood....a little Princess...and it took until now for me to find a man to measure up to My Father.
posted by
Kabu
on June 1, 2011 at 10:35 AM
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TAPS, it is from your stepping in that sometimes I learn wisdom.
Your solution is far better than to dwell on the negative. Why is it so much easier to believe the bad stuff to be the more significant? I will give some deeper thought to the times of laughter... and I don't mean his, the day he encouraged me to eat a hot pepper, then told me it would cool my tongue to suck air over it... Not that funny to a little kid... But then there was his laughter at my first ever pun... I was six, and we were driving through NYC after a rain, and I called it a 'wet Manhattan.'
I share these things because there are many who need to, now and then, air the things that hurt, update, and understand. I recently have especially needed to sort out my feelings around Dad, to distinguish those of the hurt child from those of the present time and circumstances. Many haunts fade in the light of a full-on look. Sharing the process with those in Blogit who care to read, or by some chance are drawn to read, may help them, too. Your comment, as well as my experience, may help someone else heal, too.
posted by
Ciel
on June 1, 2011 at 7:49 AM
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A post such as this is so very interesting to me, but it leaves me at a loss as to what to comment, or whether to comment at all. If I do, I feel as if I am stepping into something very private where I ought not to be at all. And yet, the feelings of sympathy, and yes empathy, go with you, for there were times that my Dad, was very much like that. He was an enigma to me and I never knew what to expect from one moment to the next. The loving and lovely memories I keep close at hand. The memories that hurt, I hide away. But now and then, posts like this bring them out in to the open where I mull them over and then hide them away again.
posted by
TAPS.
on June 1, 2011 at 7:28 AM
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