Go to Hidden eeries of desire echo to angelsongs of love
- Add a comment
- Go to Dream Girl
It is a risk to be real.
I would not be real with just anyone.
posted by
Randir
on January 14, 2011 at 2:10 AM
| link to this | reply
Re: I don't know why
well I guess there was a strong narrative flow in this one... interesting what associations it formed for you
posted by
lionreign
on January 10, 2011 at 8:14 AM
| link to this | reply
Re: Dream Girl
Thanks LadybugJudy, I think any option that changed the status of what they were would have been an improvement... I confess I went for a more dramatic close because I was making it a precautionary tale
posted by
lionreign
on January 10, 2011 at 8:06 AM
| link to this | reply
Re: Riversidepoet
oh yes, and sad that anyone should feel like they have to
posted by
lionreign
on January 10, 2011 at 8:03 AM
| link to this | reply
Re: poor girl..all she wanted to be was real....
It seems to happen a fair bit, if to a lesser degree. I'm glad you liked it
posted by
lionreign
on January 10, 2011 at 8:01 AM
| link to this | reply
Re: reign
Much more, Thanks Bill
posted by
lionreign
on January 10, 2011 at 7:56 AM
| link to this | reply
Re: Shobana
Thank you
posted by
lionreign
on January 10, 2011 at 7:54 AM
| link to this | reply
Re: sam444
Thank you so much!
posted by
lionreign
on January 10, 2011 at 7:51 AM
| link to this | reply
Re: It is a great read my friend and I felt like fleeing with her that's how
Thanks Kabu, it's nice to know I was able to make it feel that real
posted by
lionreign
on January 10, 2011 at 7:45 AM
| link to this | reply
Re: CHIFFCHAFF
Well the phrasing is all mine and the events are an exaggerated view of things I have observed over the years... the intent is mainly a precautionary tale for myself
posted by
lionreign
on January 10, 2011 at 7:34 AM
| link to this | reply
Re: Sinome
Well I did my bit to try and stop people from worrying
thanks so much sweetie, I am delighted that you enjoyed it xoxoxox
posted by
lionreign
on January 10, 2011 at 7:32 AM
| link to this | reply
Re: Dream Girl
Actually now you have described it I think this is a great idea, but I would have no idea how to achieve it
posted by
lionreign
on January 10, 2011 at 7:29 AM
| link to this | reply
Re: Very coincidental, almost telepathic, for me dear friend! - Ash
Really? It must have been the right time to write this then...
posted by
lionreign
on January 10, 2011 at 7:26 AM
| link to this | reply
I don't know why
but this reminded me of 'Tales from Europe' a series of stories that used to be on BBC1 in the '60's after Blue Peter on Thursday afternoons. I remember one about a Singing Ringing Tree and your poem really struck a chord from all those years ago
posted by
malcolm
on January 10, 2011 at 7:05 AM
| link to this | reply
Dream Girl
She should have stayed and proved to her love that she was real and not a dream..
posted by
MsJudy
on January 9, 2011 at 7:46 PM
| link to this | reply
PEDESTALS USUALLY TUMBLE, HARD FOR ANYONE TO LIVE UP TO THAT
posted by
Riversidepoet
on January 9, 2011 at 8:52 AM
| link to this | reply
poor girl..all she wanted to be was real....
but you paint a "living doll" for us, lionreign...very well done.
..
posted by
Rumor
on January 8, 2011 at 10:24 AM
| link to this | reply
reign
Z Fail but there’s more beyond words. BC-A, Bill’s R®st
posted by
BC-A
on January 8, 2011 at 9:24 AM
| link to this | reply
Very passionate thoughts Lionreign. Excellent poetry.
posted by
shobana
on January 8, 2011 at 3:39 AM
| link to this | reply
I hear you loud and clear on just crafting imagery! But it is exquisite and since we have at one time or another experienced what has been portrayed it's imagery that one can relate to, feel, understand and come to terms with! For me, that is a highly effective poem and this one has it all! sam
posted by
sam444
on January 7, 2011 at 4:53 PM
| link to this | reply
It is a great read my friend and I felt like fleeing with her that's how
real you made this poem tome. I just felt the pedestalwastoo high for any one to be able to stand on without falling.
posted by
Kabu
on January 7, 2011 at 2:11 PM
| link to this | reply
Well Lion we all put a bit of our own experiences into poems even if it is only a couple of words a kind of trademark if one had never been hurt how would one know what pain was.
posted by
C_C_T
on January 7, 2011 at 11:05 AM
| link to this | reply
The disclaimer did not seem to work for everyone thinks its personal experience...it just sounds so pausible :-) I think its just marvelous writing and by my experience I know that one can be inspired to write very real sounding pain and rapture... This is fabulous no matter what darlin' Have a terrific weekend xoxoxo
posted by
Sinome
on January 7, 2011 at 10:25 AM
| link to this | reply
Dream Girl
I think if they put music to this, and a comic strip animation video, with a damsel and a knight and had it animated so that the characters climbed through one cartoon segment to the next, as they went through various trials it could work quite well Lionreign.
I have no idea whether you read comic strips at all, or whether you can visualise characters coming to life on a written and drawn page of square bordered pictures acting out segments from the flat pictures underneath. Maybe the knight singing the song (the poem you have written) to the damsel or princess as the stages of the story progress. I don't know what style of music maybe Aerosmith, Bonjovi, or some such band... anyway Lionreign...I will go now, probably after giving you a headache, after all I've said and maybe even stretching your creativeness a tiny speck more than you had considered on such a rainy dismal day as this one ha ha.
posted by
Cheerygirl
on January 7, 2011 at 8:52 AM
| link to this | reply
Very coincidental, almost telepathic, for me dear friend! - Ash
posted by
ash_pradhan
on January 7, 2011 at 8:02 AM
| link to this | reply