Go to I am here and I am not silent
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- Go to Blaming the other guy for your own problems
You are SO right!
I'm going to be following your posts with great interest, as I have just escaped from a verbal/emotional/psychological abuse relationship myself. I really scared myself the day I told my mother that if it were only him and me, I would not seek divorce, but since there were the two children, I could not stay. To allow them to be abused as I was being abused (and it was beginning) would be to violate their trust in me, and God's trust in me when He gave them to me. I couldn't stay.
What you've said about blaming is very true. My ex blamed me for the fact that he was laid off three times in three years, for the fact that his boss said he didn't get enough work done in the time he spent on the job, and for the fact that we were living in a state other than his home state. He blamed me when he got a speeding ticket, and when he wrecked my car. The blame never stopped. And when I suggested that we needed to enter counseling for our relationship, you would have thought that I'd suggested something immoral.
I don't want to go on at length here, but everything you have said so far is indubitably true. Keep up the good work!
posted by
editormum
on February 10, 2003 at 6:49 PM
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Accepting Responsibility
Yeah, I think you are describing an inability to take responsibility. Another way to look at the same thing is that if someone feels they are too upset to drive, then they should not drive. Are these acts of avoidance just more convenient, in that there is not only no fault but no action or effort required to exercise due care in ones own actions?
I also read the whackbird page on how to conduct so-called psychic terrorism. Heh, I promptly got out the tinfoil and craft supplies and then sent a massive thought bomb out... 
posted by
vroom
on February 10, 2003 at 6:03 PM
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