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Re: Why go on or even see it as a date at all?
Well Carl...all very true in retrospect however alot of this is back from the days in the sorority house...thanks and hope to see you again soon...
posted by
Annicita
on March 28, 2009 at 8:55 AM
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Why go on or even see it as a date at all?
It is one thing to say that you should go out to a restaurant, play, poetry reading, movie, concert, game or karaoke with your friend, her date and her date's friend, and quite another to say that you should go on a date with her date's friend. Your friend may have a courtship going on, but you obviously do not, certainly not with someone you haven't even corresponded with. There is no basis for any courtship so, of course, the "date" is doomed. You may have a fine time going out and enjoying doing things with "the gang" without imposing the pressure of having the "date" go well.
Back in the day when "date" meant "appointment", a distinction was made between plain, old, garden-variety "dates" devoid of any sentiment or emotional risk and the "hot date" with someone you had already fallen for and wanted to be the prelude or continuation of a courtship. With a "date", the criteria for goodness was the event itself -- was it a good movie, play or game? was the food good? -- while with a "hot date", the criteria for goodness was the courtship -- did they keep looking into your eyes as if they would die if they looked away? did their lips with every story and phrase invite you to kiss? did you hold hands? -- with the event only a setting and an opportunity to be together. In these terms, both types of dates can be successful according to their own criteria. You just need to decide what kind of date it is and make sure that your friend understands it, too.
Regards,
Carl Peter
posted by
cpklapper
on March 27, 2009 at 7:27 AM
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