Go to The Riffs Room Re-upholstered
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- Go to My karma ran over my dogma: Part Uno
Maybe they will hire you to dance on tables?
I'm sure the outfit would be quite fetching!
posted by
Ciel
on February 23, 2009 at 11:29 AM
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LOL!
You might be starting a new dance craze!
posted by
Whacky
on February 12, 2009 at 11:41 PM
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I just wait for your posts to come along for they are priceless. Sorry
about the pain but you tell the tale so well one forgets to ask if you are alright now.
posted by
Kabu
on February 12, 2009 at 10:35 PM
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Guy, surely this is the phrase of the week, one I will cheerfully steal:
"Marilyn immediately levitated about two feet off the waterbed, screamed a note that only dogs and bats could properly hear..."
I'm still laughing at that one!
posted by
strat
on February 12, 2009 at 6:19 PM
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Charlie's horses will ALWAYS throw you for a loop!
Strat,
Marilyn gets charlie horses late at night, while sleeping. Each time, I only become aware of this when she begins chanting, "No, NO! NOOOOOO! Numerous expletives deleted! (Repeat in progressively increasing decible levels)
The only way that I have ever found to make my own leg cramps concede defeat, is to pound on my own calf muscle until it releases it's painful grip. Knowing this therapuedic solution would get me murdered when I again fell asleep, I thought of an alternative therapy. I told her (years ago) that I could give her nearly instant relief, if she consented to try my therapudic touch. Of course she consented. Instead of punching her calf (I'm NOT Donnie!), I placed my hands around her calf and instead of punching it, without warning, I merely suddenly gave one mighty SQUEEZE. Marilyn immediately levitated about two feet off the waterbed, screamed a note that only dogs and bats could properly hear, and in a storm of profane threats upon my life, promised to make me pay dearly for torturing her as though I was dreaming about strangling my ex-wife! (Plausible!)
Her leg cramp had already fled, but I was, and still am, lower than old whale crap, low-down & high smellin' for inflicting even WORSE agony upon her poor abused and now permenantly crippled leg. I thought the saying went "shoot the messenger,"and not the DOCTOR!
Guy
posted by
northsage_45
on February 12, 2009 at 4:11 PM
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Strat
roflmao but of course whenever I get the chance to read you, I wind up like that. It was just early this past week I slipped on the ice but had no audience and just screamed until Kabu could come out and watch me crawl and shimmy my way to the mud room on my belly.......Another great post Strat old buddy.....
posted by
WileyJohn
on February 12, 2009 at 2:44 PM
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Glad you got a chuckle, Sam!
posted by
strat
on February 12, 2009 at 10:48 AM
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Your mental picture is about spot on, Timmy!
It was pretty funny, in retrospect. Right then, it was downright embarassing.
posted by
strat
on February 12, 2009 at 10:47 AM
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Aww, man, Cricket -- if you're getting those things all the time,
that sucks. Next to stumping a bare toe, a charlie horse is the worst! Glad you got a chuckle out of this post!
posted by
strat
on February 12, 2009 at 10:47 AM
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Oh man! When the charlie horse hit, my leg tightened up! O my, what awful pain! This was a most hilarious post too! sam
posted by
sam444
on February 12, 2009 at 9:25 AM
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strat
Damn son!! you crack me up! I have a mental picture of you sitting in your chair, leg stiff and in the aisle, you wracked with pain trying to stomp it away, while everyone is wondering what the heck you are doing. Priceless!
posted by
TIMMYTALES
on February 12, 2009 at 9:20 AM
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LMAO ! I always so enjoy reading you., Hilarious !
I have fibromayalgia, and one of it's symptoms is charlie horses. I get them all the time, especially in the middle of the night , while stretching. The pain is horrendous. I yell out terrets like vulgarities, as well. LMAO...I could so visualize you, yelling and stomping...heehee. great read, strat.
posted by
hazel_st_cricket
on February 12, 2009 at 7:09 AM
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