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I think you shouldn't completely shut him off your daughter's life (after all, it's his choice... and her's, when she'll grow up and decide whether she needs an "once-a-month" dad). But you should and can shut him off YOUR life, your emotions. Of course you don't need him, you see it by now already. So it won't be long until your emotions will calm down too and you'll feel quite indiferent about his visiting (or not visiting) your child.
I used to be single mother too (until I met my husband) and my advice is - keep it cool, do NOT do ugly things that you might feel sorry for later, and don't dwell too much on selfishness and stupidity of so-called "daddy" (or, in fact, don't dwell on anything about him - it's the past, it's over). You don't have to judge or punish him, there are higher forces working on that right now.
And keep your spirits up, there is somebody out there waiting for you, somebody who will be ready to love you as you are, and to care for your child.
posted by
hagi
on December 27, 2007 at 7:06 AM
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let him see the baby
once a month at his parents house. Drop her off for about 4 hours once a month at his parents, if they agree. If he doesn't make it to thier house, then he cannot see her.
posted by
homegirl
on June 11, 2007 at 7:26 PM
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speaking from experience...
When you begin to feel like this, it might be an idea to tell him you need some time alone (make up whatever you think he's most likely to accept) then you can have break from him without burning bridges that your baby may not appreciate when they gorw up. Any advice you get is going to be much easier for us to say than it will be for you to actually do, Just be the strong mother you are and do whatever you can justify to yourself and Baby, no one else.
posted by
Davidel
on May 18, 2007 at 3:13 PM
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