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Thanks for the advice

Thank you Madamoiselle and Trisha. I will make it a point to split it into smaller, easier to digest sections.

Being as this is my first attempt at blogging with my writing, I am rather new at the game and have much to learn.

Thanks again,

Dghowler

posted by Dghowler on May 11, 2007 at 10:08 AM | link to this | reply

Starts as a nice story

Mademoiselle is right it will be easier split up.

good work!

posted by trisha4005 on May 10, 2007 at 10:23 PM | link to this | reply

Nice spelling by me (in that previous comment).

Sorry about that.

So I'd open each cage. I'd unlock every pen,
let the animals go, and start over again.
And, somehow or other, I think I could find
Some beasts of a much more un-usual kind.

posted by Mademoiselle on May 10, 2007 at 9:33 PM | link to this | reply

It is good.

However, might I suggest you divide it up into slightly smaller (and therefore, less daunting) sections?

Also, that way, you could then post more often, too (to increse potential readership).

The lions and tigers and that kind of stuff
They have up here now are not quite good enough.
You see things like these in just any old zoo.
They're awfully old-fashioned. I want something new!

posted by Mademoiselle on May 10, 2007 at 9:30 PM | link to this | reply


posted by star4sky5 on May 10, 2007 at 7:57 PM | link to this | reply