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shelly
you were just smelly
posted by
Lanetay
on April 5, 2007 at 6:00 PM
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NewYorker_in_Sicily
seems like we have mixed answers, that is sad
posted by
Lanetay
on April 5, 2007 at 5:59 PM
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ProperleyPlayed
how about this one this hurts me more than you
posted by
Lanetay
on April 5, 2007 at 5:57 PM
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My dad wasn't around so it was just my mom and my grandparents.
My grandfather was pretty strict but I never really got spanked. My brothers got into more trouble than I did.
posted by
shelly_b
on April 5, 2007 at 5:27 PM
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I never got hit that much
but honestly in hindsight I think I would have opted for a good slap or a spanking instead of all the verbal abuse I got - they leave scars more than physical violence does. Then when kids cut off ties with their parents, the parents complain about being "abandonded" by their kids. My parents put up with a lot of crap from their parents, so I guess that's all they could give back. But while my parents put up with it till the day their parents died, I ran away as fast as I could and have not looked back. It kills me not to have a relationship with them, but their comes a time when you have to look reality in the face, and honestly I have not felt better.
posted by
NewYorker_in_Sicily
on April 5, 2007 at 4:39 PM
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I don't think being feared is being family. I noticed that when I behaved in certain ways toward my daughters, who are only one year apart, they would turn around and treat each other the same way that I treated them. Uh oh. So, if I felt as a last resort I had to spank someone's hand or whatever, even mildly, then they start hitting each other, and I catch myself saying, "NO HITTING." Well, that was stupid.
So, I guess we just have to set the example of the behavior they should copy, and that is not easy to do. Since I was a good child, calling in Dad for the bad behavior seems appropriate and fair. Ha ha!
posted by
Jenasis
on April 5, 2007 at 12:33 PM
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ladychardonnay
I am happy I had a wonderful dad, where is your dad now?
posted by
Lanetay
on April 5, 2007 at 12:02 PM
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there wasn't very much physical abuse - mostly verbal
my two older sisters were much more affected than I was - which is odd because I spent the most time with my father growing up. for some odd reason he would give me the lecture on what a piece of shit I was - and i would go to my room and paint and think to myself what an asshole he was.
posted by
ladychardonnay
on April 5, 2007 at 7:05 AM
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offy
you and I feel the same I think on this subject must be the time we lived in
posted by
Lanetay
on April 5, 2007 at 7:04 AM
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lady
I am glad but do you ever get over it? Glad to hear that about you and your kids it doesnt always go that way
posted by
Lanetay
on April 5, 2007 at 7:03 AM
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lilane
I got a spanking when I needed it (not very often, maybe 2 in my whole life) and I spanked mine in the same fashion...No scars or trauma...just parenting..
posted by
Offy
on April 5, 2007 at 6:59 AM
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i am over it - but i broke the cycle with my children
posted by
ladychardonnay
on April 5, 2007 at 6:57 AM
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lady
sorry to hear that leaves a scar for life
posted by
Lanetay
on April 5, 2007 at 6:51 AM
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my parents spanked me when I deserved it
and yes i heard the dreaded wait til your father gets home crap too - but my mother was a little nutty at times too and was violent. but my father was a mean verbally abusive bastard.
posted by
ladychardonnay
on April 5, 2007 at 6:47 AM
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