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PF
It wasnt all about me being fat its about the way people dont look beyound the fat, I have always had a weight problem, and I know I would look and feel better, but you make it sound like I dont do anything to try and change. I hate to tell you how many diets I have been on only to give up because the weight doesnt come off. I am like popeye I am what I am.
And I dont feel the commets below was just BS maybe they are more open minded.
posted by
Lanetay
on November 19, 2006 at 9:59 AM
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Mark and Chris....
Will you two ever grow up???????????
posted by
Passionflower
on November 19, 2006 at 9:50 AM
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Lilane...I didn't mean to criticize or be derogatory.
All I'm saying is that you would look and feel better if you were thinner and in better physical shape. That's the truth whether you want to hear it or not.
You know that I'm not one of those people (read some of the comments below) who will fill your head with bullshit. You've got plenty of people who will lie to you just to make you feel better (read some of the comments below).
It's up to you if you want to stay fat. But don't whine that you can't find a man if you decide to do so.
posted by
Passionflower
on November 19, 2006 at 9:49 AM
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chris2303
yes I do know that
posted by
Lanetay
on November 19, 2006 at 9:21 AM
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star4you
thank you for your advise, I am waiting for the blue moon
posted by
Lanetay
on November 19, 2006 at 9:20 AM
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They may have been hot
but I couldn't walk properly for six months after that. And then I took her watch out.
posted by
chris2303
on November 19, 2006 at 8:41 AM
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Or old AND fat ~
Damn, that makes me hard. The old broads are kinda hot, too.
posted by
mark2556
on November 19, 2006 at 8:37 AM
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lustorlove
I'm not sure I agree. Some of us like the experience from an older lover, fat or not.
posted by
chris2303
on November 19, 2006 at 8:27 AM
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ladychardonnay
what site is that?
posted by
Lanetay
on November 18, 2006 at 6:09 PM
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forget good looking - all they do is look in mirrors
i'm telling you - my friend sharon joined some site and is having the time of her life. she went on a trip to mexico with a friend and is having fun. she weighs about 220 and is 5'6" and loves country music and nascar. she just weeds out the weirdos. she has 2 teenage boys and doesn't tell them anything right away - she's going to lunch.
posted by
ladychardonnay
on November 18, 2006 at 5:58 PM
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ladychardonnay
I want a real man but usually the good looking ones are not worth the trouble
posted by
Lanetay
on November 18, 2006 at 5:53 PM
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my doctor told me that when a woman turns 30
her body stays at its "comfort" weight. i gained about 70 pounds with my second child (at 29) and it took me about 8 months to get from a size 14 to 5 and it was grueling. i went to bed hungry / drank gallons of water / and was a miserable bitch. that last 10 pounds was the hardest. i have been the same size since - the key was smaller portions. then i got pregnant at 35 and watched what i ate - which was a box of twinkies every night. but for some reason it just melted away. work on the BEAUTY INSIDE FIRST - then worry about the rest. there are plenty of men out there with love handles and bald heads that are dying for some love - do you want a movie star or a real man?
posted by
ladychardonnay
on November 18, 2006 at 5:47 PM
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ladychardonnay
there is a lot of problems if you diet and binge as it throws your metabolism off and you cant lose weight or the yoyo syndrome. Lose, gain, lose gain thats not good either. I could stop eating all together and may lose a pound or two. it just doesn't come off and the older I get the harder it gets
posted by
Lanetay
on November 18, 2006 at 5:42 PM
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Hey, that's an excuse
Hey, don't worry, right person, right people, right time it happens for every one in a blue moon, just like the orchids bloom.......so wait for your time.
posted by
star4sky5
on November 18, 2006 at 5:40 PM
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my sisters are fat and they are always dieting
i am the only one that is skinny - but i have allergies to eggs, chocolate, coconut, etc... so i think never developing a sweet tooth and being energetic has not developed alot of fat cells in my body. but i am also small chested and i get comments about that.
posted by
ladychardonnay
on November 18, 2006 at 5:38 PM
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ladychardonnay
I am sure you are very nice, but just like you cant control the fact you are skinny some of us can control we are fat. I wish more people understood that.
posted by
Lanetay
on November 18, 2006 at 5:34 PM
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just because someone is skinny doesn't make them nice
i am skinny because of my metabolism - but i am nuts!!!!! that is what keeps the men away from me - they never know which personality is talking to them - hahahaha. take it slow sweetie it doesn't have to happen tonite - i know how lonely it can be though.
posted by
ladychardonnay
on November 18, 2006 at 4:34 PM
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OFFBEATS
thank you Sally, you and Anthony are the only ones so far that haven't said something derogatory about me or fat people
posted by
Lanetay
on November 18, 2006 at 4:22 PM
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lilane
I think your beautiful...
posted by
Offy
on November 18, 2006 at 4:19 PM
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I meant unattractive skinny people
posted by
Lanetay
on November 18, 2006 at 4:16 PM
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Ariala
and that might be the best person alive if you dont give them a chance. I find real skinny people just as attractive as an overweight person. Many women and men have had that by pass surgery and some have gone overboard and look all sunken in,
posted by
Lanetay
on November 18, 2006 at 4:15 PM
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I admit, I've never liked fat men...I can handle skinny, even unattractive
faces, but fat, I don't like.
posted by
Ariala
on November 18, 2006 at 3:37 PM
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Passionflower
I whole heartily disagree, some people cant help it.
posted by
Lanetay
on November 18, 2006 at 3:24 PM
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LILANE....If you're happy fat, then that's fine-
But I don't think you are. I think you substitute food for sex/love/companionship.
{ps-nobody is just 'made to be fat'}
posted by
Passionflower
on November 18, 2006 at 3:07 PM
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jollyjeff
thats all that counts
posted by
Lanetay
on November 18, 2006 at 1:35 PM
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tickleurfancy
you are my hero
posted by
Lanetay
on November 18, 2006 at 1:34 PM
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My cousin
weighs at least 400 pounds, but he still met a woman and they've been happily married for 5 years now.
posted by
jollyjeff
on November 18, 2006 at 1:10 PM
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heartbreakers
as one of the good looking hot beefcake of a guy...(ok gone a bit to far lol ) i try to look beyond the outward and take people for who they are...i don't consider myself to be good looking and am suspect of peoples motives when they pass compliments and keep going on about looks...are they perhaps insecure themselves?
posted by
t_u_f_
on November 18, 2006 at 1:06 PM
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ladychardonnay
well she almost chased off the current one but he keeps coming back and now wants to come here at my house. she isnt use to me having men around, I want him here but like you said work it slow
posted by
Lanetay
on November 18, 2006 at 12:27 PM
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i had one at 35 and it doesn't matter
then they are not the "right" man. and you can have a separate life outside of being a mother. i have never brought any men into my children's lives unless they were gay or I was about to marry them. alot of men welcome children just to be with you. you sound a little afraid and it is scary out there. i don't want to get my feelings hurt either. but don't let your child dictate your social life either. i have 3 kids and that was never a problem for me. maybe you just need to ease into it at whatever pace you are comfortable with.
posted by
ladychardonnay
on November 18, 2006 at 11:41 AM
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ladychardonnay
part of my problem is I had a kid at 42 and men dont want an older person with a kid and then the kid doesnt want to share her mom with a man
posted by
Lanetay
on November 18, 2006 at 11:06 AM
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i think because when we are young it is easier to date
you haven't really formed a picture of your "perfect" mate. then if you have children you might prolong the relationship for the stability factor. I never should have married my 2nd - he should have been a boyfriend. But when we get older and a little set in our "own" ways - you get tired of compromising. one of my friends is very heavy and was unsuccessful at dating until she joined a matchmaker website. No lies - put it all out there - now she is never home. There is someone for everyone - and you sound like a good person to me. Give it a try. Meet for lunch somewhere and take your own car and see how it goes.
posted by
ladychardonnay
on November 18, 2006 at 11:02 AM
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ladychardonnay
but why does it take so long to find someone capatable, I am a great person
and I only have had one husband
posted by
Lanetay
on November 18, 2006 at 10:55 AM
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i am a big flirt - but i don't have sex with guys
we trade insults and stories. i work in a bar and that makes people even hornier. i joke around alot on my posts but in all seriousness - your age and weight may not be your problem. maybe you are just not meeting anyone compatible. when we get older - our standards change and if we can't have what we "really" want - we stay alone. i am 47 and have a steady relationship with my 3rd ex-husband and would never cheat on him. i screwed around when we were separated - but found out that the grass wasn't greener. if it wasn't for him - i would be alone.
posted by
ladychardonnay
on November 18, 2006 at 10:47 AM
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Passionflower
and I understand you, but not that is right and if I am alone for another 20 years then I will be alone and by that time I will be pushing up daisy anyway. I have always had a weight problem, and its not like I dont try, but I guess I am meant to be fat, so be it.
posted by
Lanetay
on November 18, 2006 at 10:33 AM
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Lustor...I DO hear what you're saying.
but I really feel like it's sometimes easier to just blame society or our genetics rather than really getting serious about weight loss. Maybe you have a thyroid problem.
Have you had it checked? I'm glad you're working out and eating right, but evidentally it isn't enough. Society isn't going to change the way it looks at fat people. PLus it really is bad for your health.
If you lost 50 pounds it would greatly increase your self-esteem. I've had a wieght problem my whole life. I constantly have to work at it so I'm speaking from experience.
posted by
Passionflower
on November 18, 2006 at 10:26 AM
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OFFBEATS
that is true but fat people are stereotyped. Just like races are stereotyped. The men I attract are usually way younger then me as they are tired of the young gals that play head games. And yes there are a lot of men that like heavier set ladies. Many times I see heavy set women with real skinny guys or vise versa
posted by
Lanetay
on November 18, 2006 at 10:16 AM
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Passionflower
I work out 2 times a week and my daughter go on walks and I do eat healthy, but it doesnt always have to do with all that. Its just too bad people are stereotyped. Like all fat people are not healthy or lazy and their backs are messed up because of it. But I have known skinny people with higher blood pressure and worse backs then mine. I know I would look better in my clothes but I also have a lot to offer someone if they would look past a few things.
posted by
Lanetay
on November 18, 2006 at 10:10 AM
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There are thousands of men who like bigger women...
There are thousands of women who do not like bigger men...there is no right or wrong answer on this. It is what you prefer is all~
posted by
Offy
on November 18, 2006 at 10:05 AM
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Lilane...that's not always true...
Everyone wants to be pleased to be seen out in public with whoever they're dating though. That's a normal thing.
I know this isn't popular, but we as a society, are very much prejudiced against fat people. 2 weeks ago, I was in line at the deli and this huge woman was in front of me...she was moving around getting ketsup and salt and napkins.
She took up the whole place. Everyone had to stand back till she was done. Overweight people just don't look good in their clothes either. Join a gym and get in shape. Working out is a great way to meet people (guys).
Work out each day and eat healthier. You'll feel better about yourself.
posted by
Passionflower
on November 18, 2006 at 10:02 AM
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