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- Go to Snapshots of a Wild Gringo fisherman in Mexico and his wild dog Waterboy.
dknowles, I knew that the story was a little chopped up and out of order as I wrote it
just as I thought it and typed it without reviewing it for anything other than typos. Sorry. My Dad, may he rest in peace, the newspaper editor would fault me for that and my Mom, the ex-English teacher would also.
Again, I thank you for taking the time to read the two things that I felt worth reading in my blogs and for commenting on them.
I'll go into Word and tightened them up a bit and just add a little more description of detail AND fix the chronology just for your peace of mind. Gracias mil for your time and attention, Abuelita
posted by
benzinha
on October 30, 2003 at 5:55 PM
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My Review
As usual, benz, you write with vision and clarity. If I have one criticism I would like to see your descriptions of Miguel in a more chronological order. That may just be personal preference. Don't know.
As for the hook:MIGUEL AND WATERBOY: A STORY would have worked nicely since the opening line did all of the attention grabbing. The word of the day is "tantalize." Like a sweet smell that slips out of a busy kitchen or the mists that shroud a waterfall on a hot day....get it? Tantalize I'll find a potential market for this and email you.
By the way, no stars, you don't need stars. On the other hand, if you really wanted some
try these.
posted by
dknowles
on October 29, 2003 at 10:39 PM
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And everyone in between can just go to hell!!!! Thanks Benzi!!! You are the Best!!!
posted by
Crabby
on September 20, 2003 at 11:55 AM
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crabby, I thank you and can now go work at my real job. Someone read my blog and commented.
You are kind to old people, children and animals.
posted by
benzinha
on September 20, 2003 at 11:53 AM
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Crabby just read yer g'dang blog...
You are a wonderful story teller...... anyone can write... but not everyone can tell a story.
posted by
Crabby
on September 20, 2003 at 11:45 AM
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Would someone please come and read my story about Miguel? I couldn't sleep last night,
arthritic pain to the max and wrote for hours. Please?
posted by
benzinha
on September 20, 2003 at 11:41 AM
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