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MimiMEJKnowles - thank you - it is funny that some people cannot
simply stay away from things that upset them.
I've had people whos posts I have never commented on, accuse me of harrassing them? I've always felt that there is a minimum level of sensitivity needed to participate in a public forum. If someone is an emotional cupcake, they will become upset no matter what, while at the same time we must all consider others. Its a bit of a balancing act, we have the freedom to express our opinions and there is no need to intentionally upset people while doing so but at the same time; each individual has their own inherent responsibilities to not knowingly put themselves in a situation where they are likely to become upset.
posted by
gomedome
on August 29, 2006 at 10:47 PM
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Great words!
You've hit the nail right on the head! As you've said, not everyone who shares their views and opinions here or elsewhere on the web - or anywhere else, for that matter! - are not out to foster controversy. In fact, I'm sure that most people aren't. They're just here to share their views with the world and/or to let out steam. That's why I'm here. If people disagree with me, well, that happens. I don't come with any rose covered glasses that keep me ignorant to the fact that my views are not those of everyone else. As you also said, if a person doesn't like what someone else wrote or it angers you, why read it? Stay away & avoid letting yourself get all upset. What good is that going to do?
posted by
MimiMEJKnowles
on August 29, 2006 at 8:49 PM
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I need to add something to your comment...
How can a person also debate/argument with an opposite view unless you know all the facts and that also includes knowing why somebody says/do the things they do.
That is why I said before, I don't always agree, but I do respect your views.
posted by
SevenStars
on August 29, 2006 at 1:18 AM
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Bhaskar.ing - I think your words are right on for the vast majority of
people and I know that they are well intentioned.
But not all people are wired the same way. There are very few instances where I have ever gotten upset with something said on this forum. My nature is that I only get offended when people pull weapons. Though it doesn't translate very well to English, a wise old person once told me that: "those who carry a grudge do all of the heavy lifting." . . the same can be said for not allowing others to offend us with emotionally charged and careless words. We do not have control of what others may say and do but we do have complete control of our reactions.......Where some may suffer and are hurt from things that are said (the biggest reason that I am very careful how I comment on the posts of others) there are some that do not define conflict as others do. To me it is invigorating to be challenged, if the opponent is in my weight class....if they are beyond my own weight class....that's even better.
posted by
gomedome
on August 28, 2006 at 8:43 PM
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gomedome, these blogger fights leaves one pretty exasperated.
Firstly, because they are personal in nature and content,and secondly, because they are energy dischargers. What happens in the process is they draw you out to wash dirty linen in public. It is demeaning and in bad taste. A writer has to have independence to express one's views and opinions. But there is always a decent way to settling diputes or arguments, or else we can't call ourselves civilized.
The distraction then makes you say aomething despite of you , and for which one repents or apologizes later. It is showing one's weakness of character. So why get into the rut? Lao-tzu, a great Chinese ascetic used to say that "I am beyond defeat, because I can never be drawn into a fight". Ignoring and still saying a good word, or reciprocating without being recioprocated is the surest way of getting the better of your enemies. Someone hurts you and if you don't feel or acknowledge that hurt - can become so unbearable for your distractors. I say this from my personal experience, because I have done so, and never lost. If you are solid, a person of conviction, then nobody can disturb your inner peace.
A last word....If in a hundred there is/are only one or two dreads , at least there are ninety-nine others who love you and are willing to listen to what you have to say, then why bother and why disappoint them?
I do want these message flashed across to 'cantenkerous' (in the words of Ariala) bloggers.
posted by
Bhaskar.ing
on August 28, 2006 at 8:17 PM
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Odysseus - thank you -- but I don't think it is anything that I have done
Today seems to be one of those really slow days, much like was experienced a lot back in late Spring.
posted by
gomedome
on August 28, 2006 at 7:55 PM
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Gomedome…..congratulations,
you’ve drawn quite an audience today!
posted by
telemachus
on August 28, 2006 at 6:03 PM
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Ariala - you have inadvertantly covered an important point
In a public forum, there will always be a few folks with their own ideas of how things should be and of how others should act. You simply cannot please everyone.
posted by
gomedome
on August 28, 2006 at 4:48 PM
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Gome, you've hit the nail on the head. I can't believe how many times
I've been challenged over the content and facking headlines I write. Give me a break people and get a life. I'm going to continue to write what I want, and plan to continue to plague the "Internet"(Blogit, LOL) with my opinion, like it or not. These people who take opposition to my style are no longer of interest to me. Trust me, I try hard to get along, but I'm not catering to people who have ill perceptions of me no matter how hard I try. That's it...Good post.
posted by
Ariala
on August 28, 2006 at 3:26 PM
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Right.
posted by
A-and-B
on August 28, 2006 at 2:02 PM
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Julia. - that's the part I get the biggest laugh out of
This is a relatively small restricted to members only site. Most of what we do here is of a self gratifying nature, or has become a habit in our daily routines, or whatever. To think that our blogs are any more significant in the grand scheme of things than having a handful of other members read our postings, is laughable.
posted by
gomedome
on August 28, 2006 at 12:33 PM
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Xeno-x - I probably should have acknowledged that I stir up my share of
conflict.
But I never go after people and take them to task for their opinions. I never have, my reaction upon reading something that I feel is out to lunch, is to just move on. However I see your point. Sometimes we come across an opinion that is based on lies with the question then arising in how much responsibility do we have to set the record straight?
posted by
gomedome
on August 28, 2006 at 12:27 PM
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mysteria - thank you - it seems sometimes that people forget that we are in
a public forum.
posted by
gomedome
on August 28, 2006 at 12:23 PM
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gome--
I think you've hit a few nails on their shiny little heads. The best nugget for me was the sentence about the content of Blogit not shaping the world, lol.
posted by
Julia.
on August 28, 2006 at 12:11 PM
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takes two dont it
you can even disagree silently and conflict does not exist
then why would conflict exist in the first place?
I'll stir things up because i have problems with what is said -- i hate having only one side of a topic predominate -- i feel the alternative needs to be presented in order to put things in their proper perspective.
thus i probably do perpetuate some conflict.
but the great thinkers did. they did not shy away from confronting when they thought it necessary.
well, of course, socrates and Jesus -- well, they did go up against the wrong people.
but still . . . -- see what they have wrought -- "a seed falls to the ground . . . "
posted by
Xeno-x
on August 28, 2006 at 11:48 AM
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Pure and True
Basic and Instinctual. I like the way you do all the work and my mind so easily soaks up your susscinct expression : )
posted by
mysteria
on August 28, 2006 at 10:07 AM
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That's the last straw. I'm never coming back here.
Until tomorrow. I have other things to accomplish today. Have a good day gome.
posted by
SuccessWarrior
on August 28, 2006 at 10:02 AM
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