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OK Maggie, you're right-
But it felt good. He hadn't anything to do with sending me the adv. on Cabo San Lucas. He spent $2000 on that week, for us. He really did love me and if his wife had thought their marriage was dead, well, I think I'd be writing an entirely different story right now. But she did a huge territorial positioning and that changed everything, more than even he had ever anticipated. He wrote a couple of times something along the lines: "Why did I pick the one that I have to learn to love when it comes so easily with you - it's a good question I'll have to ponder." and where does that leave me? With my innards hanging out -- so once in a while I have to misbehave. I'm not sorry. We both had spouses who were suffring and not being totally heartless, did the right thing in both cases -- kept families together. It's just called responsibility. Responsible love vs. romantic love. We'll always have our fairy tale romance to remember, which is what I'm going to writing about.
And I'm still in love with my husband; he's a good man, the better man and I know that! I've been totally devoted to rebuilding our marriage, but I can't help but feel the hurt again anew when a "trigger of the recent past," like a picture of a place where I had once dreamt of, comes out of nowhere. I know I shouldn't taken it out on Mike, but I hold him responsible for my pain and heartache, at least for the moment. All I did was send him the adv. I had already said to him, a long time ago, to take his wife to OUR week in Cabo so the two sets of footprints on the beach would be theirs. (Yech, why would I say such a thing!) I have a picture of our two sets of footprints on the beach. But this is getting too close to the past so I concede. I shouldn't have -- but I did.
Now, if I only had a clone.........or is that, if I only had a brain......... I know I've got a heart because it's breaking right now............ (Wizard of Oz) Well, my REAL husband and I are going to a movie this afternoon and I'll go get ready. Jay's my real deal and yes, I DO know that.
Cee
p.s.
I told you to say whatever you want! It's OKAY!!
posted by
LadyCeeMarie
on February 20, 2006 at 12:35 PM
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Hi Prof and Thanks!
Nice of you to keep up with my story. Thanks for all your kind comments and congratulations on your 23 years. Just keep doing those little things that are special for the two of you.
Cee
posted by
LadyCeeMarie
on February 20, 2006 at 11:56 AM
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Enjoy your holiday.
Dear Cee.. Enjoy your holiday and I wish you happiness.. regards.. Prof.
posted by
PROF-SUMAKEL33
on February 20, 2006 at 12:13 AM
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Cee, are you misbehaving? I think so!
Is it wise to do things like that? Not that it's any of my business, but I wouldn't. Once you've decided that Jay's your life now and that Mike is a thing of the past, so be it. Why ask for trouble? You had a good morning, your husband made love to you, which is what you wanted, why spoil it with an attitude?
I know sometimes you're angry, but you want it to end, so let it be. Am I right or no?
You're way too good for him - I think he used you for the sex he wasn't getting at home. Make the best of what you've got, Cee, and that's a lot.
Tell me to shut up and mind my own business if you want to, but I don't want to see you hurt any more over him.
posted by
MaggieMae
on February 19, 2006 at 7:14 PM
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