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putting in myh order
get thee to the mall and get me an ipod
posted by
robdon67
on November 9, 2005 at 11:15 PM
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LEADERS IN DIGUISE...
Very "intertaining", instructive and eye opening to the blind, for many accept only those that are of perfect disguise; while others that don't appear...they would watch carefully. The disguised ones get away with much more than any "criminal" ever have; their record is clean. This starts at the top. Thanks for sharing. I enjoyed.
posted by
clearlyperceived
on November 9, 2005 at 2:16 PM
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Hi, Cunning. How are you? Stomped down the cold bugs yet?
(A)
posted by
A-and-B
on November 9, 2005 at 1:30 PM
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Cunning,
The only time I ever stole anything was when I was around 16 years old. It was a Bob Seiger cassette tape. Got busted. Never attempted it again. I'm now officially a chicken shit.
posted by
SpitFire70
on November 9, 2005 at 12:23 AM
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Raunchy growing up tales!
(B)
posted by
A-and-B
on November 8, 2005 at 8:11 PM
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Ha ha!! You are just WRONG!
posted by
Holy_Grail
on November 8, 2005 at 5:40 PM
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Cunning,
Actually, I was crazy when I exploited the kindness of strangers. If it weren't for the kindness of strangers, I'm sure I wouldn't be here today, which raises the question Diana Krall asks on her album, "Is the kindness we count upon hidden in everyone?" Obviously not, but enough to make it worthwhile, and resore my faith in the human race.
It's not much of a kindness, though, is it to get an obviously trashed handicapped guy more drink. It's more of a brushoff, I think. I am getting weary of getting run off the sidewalk by "Scooters", the wheelchair for really obese people, who fly down the sidewalk and in supermarket aisles like they hate ambulatory people and are looking to pick a fight.
posted by
Blanche.
on November 8, 2005 at 2:55 PM
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Gawd Lord I must confess
I took a candy bar once...........(I swear I was a starving little chubby girl of 8 yeras of age) I will never forget the feeling I got from making it out the store with that candy bar. Nothing feels worse than shame....at least for me. I NEVER ever stole anything ever again in my life because of how it made me feel. NOW when men tell me I stole their heart....I gotta say...I feel bad, but not 'Bad, bad' like I did when I stole that candy bar
posted by
ALWAYSALOVER
on November 8, 2005 at 2:50 PM
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Blanche
You're crazy if you don't exploit the kindness of strangers lol. That guy with Cerebral Policy probably came from a bar where he got free drink after free drink. Corky got shiffaced on someone else's dime.
posted by
CunningLinguist
on November 8, 2005 at 2:05 PM
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Oooh, bad Linguist, very bad. I can imagine that nobody wants to be the heavy that busts a guy in a wheelchair. I once watched as other clerks in a bookstore I worked at drag a guy with Cerebral palsy out of the store. He was plowed, trashed, three sheets to the wind, and a pain in the patoot, but it didn't sit well with the other customers to watch him be 86ed out of the store. It felt like Scrooge beating up on Tiny Tim. I'm sure he used that a lot.
posted by
Blanche.
on November 8, 2005 at 1:58 PM
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Cosy
sorry, I've been relocated thanks to the Witness Protection Program. I squealed on a jaywalking so they let me off easy.
posted by
CunningLinguist
on November 8, 2005 at 1:54 PM
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Cunning
I was a store manager for five years and busted many, many little innocent kids like you, you little bastard! LOL I will proceed to inform the retail world in your postal area about your whereabouts!
Shoplifter's Most Wanted: Cunninglinguist, the multi-personality suffering blogger with a big tongue and hair-do!
posted by
cosy
on November 8, 2005 at 1:48 PM
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cunning...I have faith in you. You may be rusty, but "yew con dew eet!"
And Jojo...LMAO at your criminal response...I sense you have a bit o' Al Capone in your blood.
posted by
Masky
on November 8, 2005 at 9:41 AM
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Jojo
I'm a bad influence, but a good earner. My unauthorized autobiography will include tips and ideas on how to get the most out of a dollar. ;-)
posted by
CunningLinguist
on November 8, 2005 at 9:38 AM
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Masky
My talents have not been called upon in many moons. I might be a big rusty. And I can't promise you that if I successfully made away with Victoria's Secret I wouldn't be tempted to... well, let's just say tempted. I'm intrigued by your proposition however. This message will self-destruct.
By the way, I clicked on your comment in my "new comments" section and then when I got there there was no comment -- but I saw that there was a comment! I clicked several times and finally broke through to your comment. Sorry about the delay.
Sincerely, the Cunning Criminal
posted by
CunningLinguist
on November 8, 2005 at 9:35 AM
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Hmm..
You've given me an idea. Perhaps I could lead some of the folks on my caseload into a new direction into life.
posted by
jojostar
on November 8, 2005 at 9:32 AM
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Dear Criminal: I am in dire need of some new panties from Victoria's
Secret. The bitch is too high priced, but I love her cotton britches. Would you be so kind as to allow me to employ you? Would you roll on in there and 10-finger discount me some size Medium's in multi-colors? I will reward you with good, homecooked meals; tofu turkey, baked beans, oatmeal cookies - anything your hungry, criminal heart desires.
Sincerley,
Masky
posted by
Masky
on November 8, 2005 at 9:28 AM
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