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kiddo
that is really not your true nature. the punishment you feel you deserve has come from your decision to punish others. you think i'm interested in being 'goody goody'? i could care less. what i do care about is having mental sanity.
posted by
avant-garde
on September 20, 2005 at 4:56 AM
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I will worry about it, thats my nature...lol. I punish myself!
posted by
Kiddo75
on September 19, 2005 at 6:29 PM
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kiddo
don't worry about it. have a great night.
posted by
avant-garde
on September 19, 2005 at 6:04 PM
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I am bad though, and I apologize for being a smart ass this morning.
I had no right to jump down your throat because my shitty night ran through to this morning. I was (and still am!
) looking for any reason to make someone feel as crappy as I do. But, I had to switch into mommy mode for right now, and when that happens I realize things I couldn't see or didn't care to see earlier. ANd for my smart ass comment, I am sorry. But when the kids go to bed, watch out! lol...
posted by
Kiddo75
on September 19, 2005 at 3:16 PM
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kiddo
that is because wanting good is saying to yourself, 'i am bad. this is bad.' that is what you will experience.
posted by
avant-garde
on September 19, 2005 at 1:31 PM
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isa
i think slow progress lasts better. i heard that wisdom is slow growing, like rings on a tree. time means nothing to a soul learning truth.
posted by
avant-garde
on September 19, 2005 at 1:30 PM
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I am making some slow progress...
but i think i can handle it a little bit better...
posted by
Marshallengraved
on September 19, 2005 at 12:56 PM
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I stopped all that goody goody crap. Today I just smash.
nothing good comes from wanting good - and trying to think positive or read about good things is just hurting my head.
posted by
Kiddo75
on September 19, 2005 at 6:23 AM
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kiddo
yeah, that was the one. but it wasn't for the reason you thought. it was about people who have done good things for others. after reading about what you had given to others, i thought it would be good to acknowledge it. that's all.
posted by
avant-garde
on September 19, 2005 at 6:20 AM
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Nope - sure didn't, which one did you want me to read? The Jesus one
, the one where bloggers write about their zany wacky family vacations, or the one where bloggers should not express their opinions on a website that they pay for in a comment section where you are supposed to do just that very thing - because even though it goes against the whole concept of "Comment Section", the blog Master only wants his questions answered the way he wants - and his ideas and thoughts only commented on if it is in his favor and sings of sunshine and rainbows? That post? Nope. I am not real keen on people who can't be open minded and listen to others instead of just passing down snooty judgement. Thanks for turning me on to that, though...whew! That would have put a real bug up my ass today!
posted by
Kiddo75
on September 19, 2005 at 6:16 AM
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isa
me, too. i only hurt myself when i react with anger.
posted by
avant-garde
on September 19, 2005 at 3:45 AM
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schree
i saw an interview of dog on montel. it was pretty good. thanks.
posted by
avant-garde
on September 19, 2005 at 3:45 AM
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kiddo
have you seen aria4's post from yesterday?
posted by
avant-garde
on September 19, 2005 at 3:44 AM
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avant garde...
i have spoilt a lot in my life through anger and i always regretted it when i reacted this way...it is very unhealthy and i am trying to react less and less...
posted by
Marshallengraved
on September 18, 2005 at 9:57 PM
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A&E
I was wrong..that "dog the bounty hunter" show..my bad..Schree`
posted by
Schree
on September 18, 2005 at 7:02 PM
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On that show on A&E..
The one with the drug addicts and stuff..They had this guy who had an anger addiction. This is a real illness..It falls under the behavioral sciences..This guy was a hot mess too!!! Schree` (as a matter of fact, it's coming on now I think)
posted by
Schree
on September 18, 2005 at 6:59 PM
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yeah, but right now it's the only thing that can give me back what
I want and need. I'm not an angry person though, or a mean one. I will literally give the shirt off my back to someone in need. Just today I gave 4 pair of my REALLY good jeans (
) to a friend of my sister's as well as 8 or 9 shirts, and 3 pair of my really good shoes. PLUS spent ALL of my blogit earnings I have saved up in paypal to buy her little boy bday party supplies for his 1st bday party saturday. Her trailer burned down and they have nothing. She is a single mom, no help from the dad. She needed just a little help and giving always makes me feel good. So this anger thing is just something that was given to me. Can't shake it off....but I'm not going to do harm to anyone...(that doesn't deserve it...lol...JK...)
posted by
Kiddo75
on September 18, 2005 at 6:31 PM
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kiddo
i lived with anger most of my life. yes, it is a powerful motivator. but it is also highly destructive and it gives very little back to the one who invests in it. there are choices available, such as forgiveness. for me, it was forgiving myself for not being what i wanted to be that defused much of my anger and hatred of others. good luck on your path.
posted by
avant-garde
on September 18, 2005 at 5:38 PM
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OFFBEATS
very true. i saw a picture of Angelina Jolie the other day. she was ranting about something. i told my wife, 'God, she's ugly!' and anger does make even the most beautiful face full of ugliness.
posted by
avant-garde
on September 18, 2005 at 5:36 PM
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I see where you are coming from, and for the most part I do agree.
But anger is not the same for everyone. Yes it leads to all the things you described...but for some it is the reason we are able to pull ourselves out of the bed, it's the determination that drives us when there is no one else too, and it is the only thing that has been a constant for some. No matter what. As twisted as this may seem, it is all some of us were left with. Anger comes from hurt, so the more anger one has the more deep that scar runs. And until anger runs its course for more reasons than malice and ill will towards men, it will be kept in a safe black heart.
I do believe in everything you said though, really I do. And hopefully one day I'll get that.
posted by
Kiddo75
on September 18, 2005 at 5:04 PM
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Avant
Anger is what causes ugly people! There's too much good out there to be angrry and who wants to be ugly???
posted by
Offy
on September 18, 2005 at 5:01 PM
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hemlocker
you have made an excellent point. anger is a choice, but it becomes so habitually chosen that it doesn't seem that there's any other choices available.
posted by
avant-garde
on September 18, 2005 at 4:59 PM
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ravencat
yes, that's true. the payoff just isn't there in terms of being happy and peaceful.
posted by
avant-garde
on September 18, 2005 at 4:58 PM
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Thoughtful questions, avante--
but you say "use anger" a lot, as if it were just another tool in the bag that we should not choose hastily. For most of us, it's hardly a choice, especially for the really angry people who don't know any other way to be. Hemlocker
posted by
Hemlocker
on September 18, 2005 at 4:51 PM
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Fuel for our passions
As usual, a great, thought provoking post. It's amazing what fuels our passions, is also fueling our dis-eases (yes, I meant the "-"). The havoc we (and that especially includes me) wreak when we judge others, try to put demands on everyone...and the physical ailments that follow - yes, I've been there, done that & am trying not to go there any more.
posted by
ravencat18
on September 18, 2005 at 4:24 PM
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wordsmith
becoming irritated is a problem. it seems that the more ambitious we are, the more irritable we become.
posted by
avant-garde
on September 18, 2005 at 4:07 PM
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Interesting and thought provoking post.
It is interesting that all our 'passions' can and do have a detrimental effect on the body. I know that I am prone to becoming irritated very easily due to my job situation, but I am trying to deal with that.
posted by
word.smith
on September 18, 2005 at 4:04 PM
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spitfire
oh, yes. the lesson of forgiveness. i learned to forgive my mother-in-law, who did nothing to me in actuality. i really love her now, and i even call her mom! that's real progress for me.
posted by
avant-garde
on September 18, 2005 at 3:37 PM
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jeremy
you are right. i was so bad an insomniac that just going to the psychologist didn't help. it took anti-depressants to shut my rampant thoughts down so i could sleep. i was really messed up for awhile. hell, maybe i still am!
posted by
avant-garde
on September 18, 2005 at 3:35 PM
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avant,
You make good points when you mentioned Marines, police, politicians, and religion and how they use anger as tactics. Being an Aries sun, I have a short temper, however it is short lived. I get it out of my system and I'm fine. I have made much progress in this life so far by working hard to learn to forgive and move on so I don't carry any residual anger or resentment with me. It's like walking around with a dark cloud above your head and doesn't do anyone any good. I think the healthiest thing one can do is to forgive (sometimes it certainly won't happen over night but it can and will happen) and not necessarily forget. Not forgetting keeps the lessons learned to one's advantage to avoid it happening again in the future. Great post as always.
posted by
SpitFire70
on September 18, 2005 at 3:35 PM
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ariala
i was thinking about that. i had a 'savior' complex, i think. i wanted to show these girls that all men weren't bad. but, underneath, there was a pity of them involved, that was my own self-pity placed onto them. weird.
posted by
avant-garde
on September 18, 2005 at 3:34 PM
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hi Avant
it seems to me that once mental and health go amiss,that state of not feeling whole can send you spinning at anything.I think of oxidation, where they spin and set off a chain reaction sending other electrons(I think they are called) out of control.and antioxidants are needed to set them right.Yet in that state it seems not knowing what it is to set you right is again part of the spin.
good post,thanks
posted by
appleworks7
on September 18, 2005 at 3:29 PM
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LOL, yeah, but I doubt you were a jerk!!
posted by
Ariala
on September 18, 2005 at 2:59 PM
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ariala
oh, yes. and i had the terrible attraction to men-haters. coincidence?
posted by
avant-garde
on September 18, 2005 at 2:58 PM
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Avant, I went through a year or two of it myself...I directed all my hate
and anger toward men...not good.
posted by
Ariala
on September 18, 2005 at 2:57 PM
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ariala
i used anger for so many years to achieve. it has caused me a lot of health problems, not to mention anxiety and insomnia. it is really a reminder to myself.
posted by
avant-garde
on September 18, 2005 at 2:54 PM
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I don't like feeling angry ever...sometimes it hits, but I immediately try
to deal with it because I know how unhealthy it is on my body, mind and soul. Not to mention I have no desire to hurt others, so dealing with it immediately is the best way to be at peace with myself and others. Great post!
posted by
Ariala
on September 18, 2005 at 2:52 PM
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