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Ainsley_Jo_Phillips offers evidence
of the importance of farting (or not) in social circles. Thanks for the most interesting gas of a story!
posted by
archiew
on August 4, 2005 at 3:51 AM
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I've Gotten Boyfriend Gas On At Least Two Different Occasions
When I was 13 1/2, I was lovesick over this guy I met who lived several miles away in Acapulco.
Although I don't throw up much, I must have thrown up at least twice that I can remember (and, I believe, more) after returning home to Indiana.
And I got to be gassy--and, most of the time, the gas smelled like rotten eggs!
When I was almost 17, I met this one guy, and we became fast friends.
Almost nine months later, I began to realize that I was thinking of him a whole lot more than just a friend, but he was older and a teacher at my school, so there wasn't much I could do about it.
Then, there was a rumor going around that he was getting married--which turned out to be just that: a rumor!
But (as we were close) I had the impression that I would probably be invited to his wedding (whenever that ended up happening), and I wanted to be over him by then so I could really be happy for him and his new bride.
So I asked my friends if they knew of some nice guys who might help me to get over Ron.
I was actually just thinking about playing the field, but they introduced me to Gary, and we really hit it off.
We were a couple from fall until spring, but I began to realize that we needed to think in terms of just being friends, because I could see that I seriously got on his nerves at times (and that this road went both ways).
By then, I also found out that the news about Ron's marriage was just a rumor, so, single again, I began to think about Ron.
Now, I wasn't really completely over Gary, because we had so much in common that I really wanted it to work for us--but I just knew that it wouldn't in the long-run.
At the same time, I was thinking of possibilities with Ron, because I would be graduating, and it would be okay for us to date, if we both desired to do so.
However, it seemed as if he had changed towards me in some ways--almost as if I turned him off or something.
I think he was going through some personal growing-pains, as he was only 23 (which seems so young now).
But I took his attitude towards me very personally and thought that it was, somehow, my fault.
So, I got this upset stomach and would burp--and my burps would smell as if I'd passed gas (the rotten egg type of gas).
Fortunately, this didn't happen at school--but I can tell you something that did.
I was taking this journalism class and was seated next to a couple of male seniors who were proud to toot at the drop of a hat.
The journalism room was where we put out the school newspaper as well, so Ron would come in from time to time to report scores, as he was the coach/assistant coach in a number of sports.
I kept worrying that those boys would get the room good and stinking, Ron would come in, and he would think that I did it!
Thankfully, it never happened!
Toots!
AJ 
P.S. When Beavis & Butthead made their appearance years later and seemed to have that same kind of toot-pride, I thought of those boys!
posted by
Ainsley_Jo_Phillips
on August 3, 2005 at 5:18 PM
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it's good that the anus is nowhere near the mouth and nose
unless social communication by farts were to be acceptable and bearable enough -- but there are some . . .
posted by
Xeno-x
on August 1, 2005 at 6:39 AM
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well when you get a certain age you share very well -- and then you can make an excuse when you embarrass yourself where you shouldn't
posted by
Xeno-x
on July 30, 2005 at 9:43 PM
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Wasn't me...
the dog did it...where is that dog? hummm...gotta go let him in.....
posted by
Whacky
on July 30, 2005 at 8:10 PM
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zen
Really! Such vulgarity in a family blog! What would the children say, if they knew what you were up to?
posted by
ariel70
on July 30, 2005 at 11:02 AM
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Ah, ZenLady05 . . . .
Burps and farts are two entirely different activities, with different origins, mechanisms and chemical make up. I'm still betting you fart!
posted by
archiew
on July 30, 2005 at 10:52 AM
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Eructation
I never said I don't BURP (eructation). Oh.............I burp.
Zen
posted by
ZenLady05
on July 30, 2005 at 10:36 AM
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zen
What is this? Zen And The Art of Eructation?
posted by
ariel70
on July 30, 2005 at 10:33 AM
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Zenlady05 . . . .
You probably just don't realize you fart. It is impossible to be a human being and not fart. With you, it could be either denial, farting when you are sleeping, or your farting a whole series of SBD farts that you just think are coming from the rest of your family.
posted by
archiew
on July 30, 2005 at 10:31 AM
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Farting
I have the greatest respect for farts. I don't fart, but my 91 year grandmother, my 70 year old mother-in-law, my 50 year husband, and my 20 year old son all LIVE to fart. Now, how weird is that?
Zen
posted by
ZenLady05
on July 30, 2005 at 10:26 AM
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