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Michael..It is great to question God, yourself, your friends, your lovers, your comrades, your enemies. Questioning can only help you understand them better.

posted by PhillysTales on July 22, 2005 at 12:47 PM | link to this | reply

believing in god is like marriage or other such relationship one enters

if the expectations are too high the disappointment is an equal and opposite reaction.

if people build god up to be something that god isn't, then if one even comes close to believing in that god, then events can cause doubt and disappointment.

"erase personal history" - so says Juan Matus in the Castaneda books.

so we begin by erasing this god of the personal history.

then we have a blank slate on which we can take notes objectively regarding the god that we do see through clear vision -- not through glasses colored by others' images.

posted by Xeno-x on June 23, 2005 at 9:51 AM | link to this | reply

oops
"I am the Truth." The author turned it around and said "Why were the Disciples worried? Truth was asleep in the back of the boat! Truth is a person! Truth is Jesus." I'll try to find the scripture references and make a post on my blog. Until then, I hope perhaps you will find at least a portion of what you are searching for within the things I've found valuable that I have put there for others to see.

posted by calebs_blogger on June 21, 2005 at 4:03 AM | link to this | reply

Truth
I was in a Bible study called "Experiencing God" a few years ago.  There was this amazing statement which really stuck with me.  There was a section where we were talking about when Jesus and the Disciples got into a boat, Jesus went asleep, a storm came upon the lake, and the Disciples got scared.  The author make a play on words and a scripture that goes something like "I am the truth and the

posted by calebs_blogger on June 21, 2005 at 3:59 AM | link to this | reply

Michael...
How we define god influences what we expect of him. In my very first post, 'Making Magic work for You', I defined God as the Source of All Life. God, to my mind, is impartial, and not in the business of granting personal favors to people fighting wars. I don't think he cares much, one way or another... On the other hand, I do think that when we connect with him, he has a way of giving us insights that affect our decisions, and when we make those decisions, they lead us to better places... My two pence...

posted by Wordwizard on June 20, 2005 at 3:27 AM | link to this | reply

Michael_Pilarte
If you are asking me, and I guess you are; here's how I see God(The Source)

Firstly, God is not a person, or anything like a person. God is not limited; it is all that is. It is what everything is made of. God is not emotionally tied to anything; it is tranquil. It provides us with existance, but the living is completely up to us. God is also Free Will.

We can ask for wisdon, strength, and courage, and it will be readily provided, but the actual living and getting through it is our job,; our challange.

We are here to learn how to create our reality. We make mistakes and we learn from them, we forgive ourselves (and others) for making them and we go on to the next issue (bit of karma) that we need to deal with.

Hopefully, we will see that the only way to create the wonderful, joyful and peaceful world we all want to live in, is through positive energy,thought and emotions.

Books are just books written by people who had their own agendas and beliefs when they wrote them. There are truths in the Bible, but how can you know which stories are true, which are just good advice, which are misunderstandings and which are manipulative power grabs; you can't know. Listen to your gut; let your conscience be your guide.

posted by Numinous on June 19, 2005 at 9:37 AM | link to this | reply

you are not alone
I have doubted God many times. When my marriage ended, I doubted that God cared for me and loved me. If God can "change" people and "heal", then why didn't my marriage survive? I had a miscarriage in Dec of 2000. My anger at God exploded. I doubted Him once again. And then the most terrible news that I received, I am not able to have children. How could God do this to me? I wonder why God allowed 2 planes to crash & burn in the twin towers. I wonder why God allows all the suffering that I see on the news. The Tsunami that hit India and took thousands of lives. I don't understand why God allows all this pain. I am then reminded that we deserve absolutely nothing. No one deserves a multi-million dollar home. No one deserves a bed to sleep in. No one deserves to be a parent. No one deserves the car that they drive. We don't deserve these things because we constantly disobey God. Every day, throughout the day we disobey God. But God loves us and is gracious. He gives us a home, bed, food, clothes. He gives us vehicles, money, pets, music. It is because of His grace that we have all that we have. I will never understand why some people have more than others, or why some suffer more than others. I lean on one verse, Romans 11: 34 Who has known the mind of the Lord? Or who has been His couselor? We are not meant to understand all the He does or allow. Every Christian that I know, has had doubt at least once in their life. I pray for you. I thank you for serving your country and being courageous to serve in the military. I thank you for sacrificing time with your family and friends, the comforts of home, and last but not least your life. I thank you. I will lift you up in prayer. Not only for protection as you are over seas, but that God will show His face. That you will feel His presence and KNOW that He loves you.

posted by unique_one on June 18, 2005 at 6:55 AM | link to this | reply

DEAR METTA
Challenge, my intention of the word was "to test", likea boyfriend sending his friend or paying someone to seduce his girlfriend to findout if she is faith ful.  (maybe there are different anologies other than this but my brain is a littlesmal now:)

posted by michael_pilarte on June 15, 2005 at 11:56 AM | link to this | reply

I don't know if challenge was the right word to use...

for example, I have a dear friend that I admire more than almost anyone, who is the most peaceful and God centered person I know in my life - she goes in tomorrow for surgery on an extremely rare brain tumor.  Doctors are not exatly sure what they are going to find in there... she has 3 wonderful children from the ages 6-14, runs an organic farm and is an integral part of our small community.  When the brain tumor was discovered a mutual friend and I were discussing it and she said, "How can God do this to her?  Why would He do this to someone like her?"  I paused and told my friend, "I don't think God is "doing" this to her.  I think God trusts her with this."  To the friend I was speaking with this made no sense.

In speaking with my friend that has the brain tumor and telling her about the conversation she said, "Yes, I think you are right."  and went on to explain how this experience was bringing her closer to God and she was experiencing a new sweetness with God.

There is something to be said in the experience of surrendering and trusting God... the sweetness that this can bring.  Perhaps that is why countries like Nigeria are the happiest in the world.  They have so little compared to the things we have in the West... and yet are happy.  I don't know if this has to do with trust and surrender or gratitude for what you do have.

Again, I think challenge was the wrong word.

posted by Metta on June 15, 2005 at 10:47 AM | link to this | reply

Metta

I have tried so many times to put my beliefs aside and be neutral but I cannot help it when suck chaos in in the midst and God is no where to be found.  Why must we challenge someones integrity just for us to have peace of mind and know for sure that the other person loves us, yet, why test them every day---all for what, amusement?

Great poem

posted by michael_pilarte on June 15, 2005 at 12:13 AM | link to this | reply

actually, psalm 23 says, "Yea though I walk through the valley of death"...

what an excellent point passionflower - there was King David, God's most Beloved King, going through the Valley of Death... You know, God challenges those who love Him so much... it wasn't if, or when, but he is walking through it... we all are - this is the Valley of Death, we all face it here...

sorry, I went off on a tangent.  This might sound wild, Michael... but drop all the books, drop all your beliefs of good and bad, right and wrong, and look inside yourself... look deep inside yourself, see if you don't find God in there - somewhere... heck, everywhere!

There is nothing but water in the holy pools.
I know, I have been swimming in them.
All the gods sculpted of wood or ivory can’t say a word
I know, I have been crying out to them.
The sacred Books of the east are nothing but words.
I looked through their covers one day sideways.
What Kabir talks of is only what he has lived through.
If you have not lived through something it is not true.

written by Kabir

(sorry, can't help myself, I think in poems)

posted by Metta on June 14, 2005 at 3:55 PM | link to this | reply

Passion, thanks for your fine words of wisdom

posted by michael_pilarte on June 14, 2005 at 11:15 AM | link to this | reply

I was once real close to God as well. After some tragic circumstances in my life, I got angry with God and moved away from him. It wasn't that I didn't believe he existed. I KNOW God is real. But what I didn't know was why he allowed some horrible thngs to happen to me.

I was away from him for about 2 years. I ran my own life the way I wanted. And I pretty much screwed it up in a major way. I now have a sexual addiciton and a commitment phobia. I have panic attacks.

I don't think we're qualified to run our own lives. We can't see the big picture and we don't know everything. But God does. And he loves you more than anyone ever will. He only wants what's best for you. When I look back on the events of my life I can see why certain things happened.

I hope you'll move back towards God. He loves you and only wants the best. Sure alot of shit happens we don't understand, but know in your heart that God will keep you safe and provide for you and help you get thru whatever comes.

Psalms 23 doesn't say, "If I walk thru the Valley of the Shadow of Death". It says, "WHEN I walk thru the Valley..." We all walk thru that Valley but God is always there.

posted by Passionflower on June 14, 2005 at 9:59 AM | link to this | reply