Go to MY PERCEPTIVE REFLECTION!!
- Add a comment
- Go to I HATE MYSELF AND SO WILL YOU BLOGGERS WHEN YOU HEAR WHAT I DID............
iSiSeyeS
thank you...so much for understanding.................I hope you are ok?..................take care
posted by
_Symphony_
on October 28, 2004 at 1:54 PM
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Symphony,
Just getting caught up with what's going on in your life.
Don't be too hard on yourself, dear. Everybody slips up once in a while. There's nothing for you to be ashamed of, anyway! He should have been a gentleman and left you alone.
Sounds all too familiar. My future ex is always trying to shmooze himself into my bed.
It'll be okay Maxine, don't worry :)
posted by
myrrhage_
on October 28, 2004 at 12:32 PM
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Hollee
thank you
posted by
_Symphony_
on October 28, 2004 at 12:26 PM
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Laroux
thank you
posted by
_Symphony_
on October 28, 2004 at 12:26 PM
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Jay9
thank you
posted by
_Symphony_
on October 28, 2004 at 12:26 PM
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WHAMENATOR
thank you for your advice
posted by
_Symphony_
on October 28, 2004 at 12:25 PM
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neamer
thank you
posted by
_Symphony_
on October 28, 2004 at 12:24 PM
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jamryn
thank you
posted by
_Symphony_
on October 28, 2004 at 12:24 PM
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AnnAndBenjamin
posted by
_Symphony_
on October 28, 2004 at 12:23 PM
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Tyto-Alba
thank you so much for your concern...yes I have made up my mind..............you are great
posted by
_Symphony_
on October 28, 2004 at 12:23 PM
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Symph..
Just checking in to see if you're ok. Have you figured it out yet?
posted by
Tyto-Alba
on October 28, 2004 at 7:57 AM
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Ah Symph - a tough situation. No guilt though - it happens.
posted by
Hollee
on October 28, 2004 at 7:06 AM
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SYMPHONY,
Please don't feel guilty. You did nothing wrong. You do love him and that was a part of your life together. It sounds like the hard part is deciding what to do now. Take him back or leave things the way they were. You know in your heart what you want - don't second guess yourself. I'll be thinking about you.
posted by
Laroux
on October 28, 2004 at 7:05 AM
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Symphony stop beating yourself up! Yes, it was probably a mistake but
rmemeber you cannot deny that you love this man, and he wasn't always the aggressive, abusive man you left. He was showing you the softer side, probably mroe of the man you fell in love with. I believe it was natural for you to do what you did, it happened for a reason. Even if that reason was only to make you realise that as much as you love him you can't go back. You don't want to put yourself or your kids through it again but it is a good thingthat you can be amiacable for the sake ofyour kids. Hang in there, there are worse things you can do!
posted by
Jay9
on October 28, 2004 at 5:02 AM
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SYMPHONY.....don't beat yourself up!
Clearly you love this man. And the sex was probably the best it has been in a very long time? This is the Honeymoon Phase.
But a leopard does not change its spots. What he did before, what he is capable of doing and being has not changed. It is just hidden, masked for now.
You cannot help that you love him. Deep down, though you yearn for it to work, you know somewhere deep inside of you that things will go back to where they were.
I have mixed feelings for you. Your encounter certainly was not beneficial in helping you move on and get over him, but on the other hand, you are feeling a little bit lighter in your step, albeit more confused!
posted by
WHAMENATOR
on October 27, 2004 at 9:38 PM
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Perhaps a recovery program
is what is needed here. ... for all of you. Alcoholism is a family desease.You can initiate this by attending an Alanon meeting. They will have plenty of addittional information for you there. It's just a suggestion. Better than continuing to beat yourself up, IMHO. Peace. You and your family will remain in my prayers.
posted by
neamer
on October 27, 2004 at 9:25 PM
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Counceling
sounds like a good idea for all of you. You - him and your daughter. Each of your lives affect one another. Only you know what's in your heart..........follow what is there. 
posted by
jamryn
on October 27, 2004 at 7:59 PM
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Maybe there is no deadlock;
once you've healed your mental block.
Ann
posted by
A-and-B
on October 27, 2004 at 3:06 PM
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Oh Symph...
Poor love. If it's any consolation, I've been through a similar situation. I cannot offer advice because it's all down to the individual. Follow your head first and for the right reasons. That's all I can say. But I wish you the best of everything and you'll be fine. DON'T beat yourself up about it - that's the best advice. Sweetheart
posted by
Tyto-Alba
on October 27, 2004 at 2:06 PM
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theinnkeepersdaughter
maybe?...........it has made me think on a lot of things...and has bought up feelings that I thought I stored away under the carpet
posted by
_Symphony_
on October 27, 2004 at 1:27 PM
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Symphony, maybe this is just the thing you needed to figure out...
what you really want.
posted by
theinnkeepersdaughter
on October 27, 2004 at 1:01 PM
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RachelAnna
thank you.........
posted by
_Symphony_
on October 27, 2004 at 12:14 PM
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No problem!
I screwed up like this more than once with my ex. It's easy to fall into what is comfortable even when you aren't sure it's what you want. Like I said, you're human. Chalk it up to a life lesson.
posted by
RachelAnna
on October 27, 2004 at 11:46 AM
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RachelAnna
thank you so much for understanding........
posted by
_Symphony_
on October 27, 2004 at 11:44 AM
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tremacc
thank you..............yes it is decision time...........I really need to know what I want for the future......
posted by
_Symphony_
on October 27, 2004 at 11:43 AM
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MerryAnne
thank you so much for reading
posted by
_Symphony_
on October 27, 2004 at 11:42 AM
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Tanoolicious
lol
posted by
_Symphony_
on October 27, 2004 at 11:42 AM
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Don't feel badly.
You're human. You have physical needs. Feel it out, maybe this will help you realize what you really want. :)
posted by
RachelAnna
on October 27, 2004 at 11:41 AM
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First of all, please don't hate yourself.
This is not bad. Seems you are at a crossroad. I think that if you still need time to yourself, yet want to work on the marriage, you can get him to go to marriage counseling now. If you want to end the marriage for good, now could be the time to get the ball rolling. This is a good thing. It's all about you.
posted by
Tremac
on October 27, 2004 at 9:21 AM
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Symphony, my darling,
I know you feel bad. It was a mistake. But don't let the guilt consume you. It's a destructive emotion that you don't need right now. Focus instead on the things that you have done right. Esp. your fantastic kids. Take care, OK!
posted by
MerryAnne
on October 27, 2004 at 8:52 AM
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I swear Symph, if you had posted 2 seconds later we would have posted at the same time, coz i clicked on the comments button and saw your reply to me
posted by
Tanoolicious
on October 27, 2004 at 8:36 AM
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Tanoolicious
lol...................I could hear you demanding me to come back....so I thought I better get back before you wrote it
posted by
_Symphony_
on October 27, 2004 at 8:30 AM
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hehehe yes it is!!
Omigosh i was just coming back in here to demand you return to blogit when i saw your reply!!!! hehehehehhee 
posted by
Tanoolicious
on October 27, 2004 at 8:11 AM
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hugz_n_kisses
thank you
posted by
_Symphony_
on October 27, 2004 at 8:10 AM
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Tapsel-T
yes you are right....I am not the first and I probably wont be the last...............but the gulit grips hold of me....
posted by
_Symphony_
on October 27, 2004 at 8:09 AM
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Tanoolicious
lol.............well thats a good excuse to have a day off.......
posted by
_Symphony_
on October 27, 2004 at 8:09 AM
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yeah i did that too with boyfriends, pff its being human, and messing up things is human, i understand you but dont blame yourself, we all do this sometimes
take care swie :xoxoxoxoxoxkoxoxoxox
posted by
hugz_n_kisses
on October 27, 2004 at 7:48 AM
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SYMPH - Good grief, stop beating on yourself. Do you think you are
the only girl who has ever done this. Love and old habits die hard. Just use things like this to help you make the right decisions in the future.
posted by
TAPS.
on October 27, 2004 at 7:48 AM
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Youre welcome anytime sweetie, you know im here for you... I wondered where you were yesterday and I missed you too!! 
I thought you would be busy so i didnt email you....
Yes I just read about the new subscriptions and I thought, shit, $10 a month??? Thats bloody expensive!! Apparently its for new bloggers? I think im right!
Im doin ok tho Boyd (my car) is sick and wouldnt start today so no work!
posted by
Tanoolicious
on October 27, 2004 at 7:46 AM
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man-boy
thank you so much
posted by
_Symphony_
on October 27, 2004 at 7:44 AM
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Melodystar
thank you so much...but I hate myself
posted by
_Symphony_
on October 27, 2004 at 7:43 AM
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roofpig13
thank you......
posted by
_Symphony_
on October 27, 2004 at 7:43 AM
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So you are human.
| Don't beat yourself up Symphony. Our desire for physical love and affection can be overwhelming. Take care of yourself and your little ones. |
| |
posted by
man-boy
on October 27, 2004 at 7:42 AM
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We are all human, dont beat yourself up over it. You enjoyed it he is your husband and leave it at that. Your the sweetest!
posted by
Melodystar
on October 27, 2004 at 7:40 AM
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Sym, people sometimes get controlled by either their emotions or logic sometimes. Looks like your emotions got the better of you this time. But it's not your fault. Shit happens.
posted by
roofpig
on October 27, 2004 at 7:37 AM
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Tanoolicious
thank you very much for your support.........but I cant help how I feel.......you are great
and wow Tan............I missed you...and it seems I have missed quite a lot too............a friend just informed me that blogit subscriptions have changed...........whats all that about?..........hope you are ok?...take care
posted by
_Symphony_
on October 27, 2004 at 7:36 AM
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Oh and i didnt mean stupid in an insulting way, you know I love ya and wont offend you in any way!
posted by
Tanoolicious
on October 27, 2004 at 7:31 AM
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you are NOT stupid! But you are for thinking that you are stupid when youre not!!! Did that make any sense!!!
Anyways, you wanted some affection and he is your husband after all and you still care about him, and you know what you did wasnt what you wanted when he thought he could fix things.... 
dont be too harsh on yourself!! 
posted by
Tanoolicious
on October 27, 2004 at 7:30 AM
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MiaElla
thank you so much.........I feel awful though........and I cant shake it...............I feel guilty for everything........why do I do it.......
posted by
_Symphony_
on October 27, 2004 at 7:23 AM
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Symphony,
We are only human and bound to make mistakes. Besides you have been with him for so long, and you still love him....that's difficult territory...cheer up...you'rer strong, beautiful and wonderful...just human. Hold your chin up high.
posted by
MiaElla
on October 27, 2004 at 7:19 AM
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