Life Experience

Years from now I will make a decision to end my own life. When I finally decide to do it, I want it to be something of a spectacle. Nothing short of extraordinary. But like I said this is still years from now. When it happens you and I probably won't even know each other anymore. Don't feel bad it... Sign in to see full entry.

Each quote was more cryptic and confusing then the last. With each new piece of the puzzle that I got I realized that the puzzle only got bigger. This may be a game that I cannot win. I was going to need help. I decided I needed to ask the owner. There must be some kind of record of the person that... Sign in to see full entry.

That night I started reading my new, little used book. The more I read the more important it became for me to finish it. I felt like I was unable to continue with my life until this book was finished. I would not eat, I would not sleep, and I would call in sick to work as many days as it took to... Sign in to see full entry.

So there I was, standing in the same place where all of this started so many months ago. I was looking for some kind of clue that would make all of this seem necessary. Something that would make me believe that I was doing the right thing. This enormous mistake I have found myself in is hard to... Sign in to see full entry.

The next morning I woke up and immediately noticed that my life had changed. I felt completely numb. I drank a cup of coffee and got ready for work as usual, but it was like someone else was doing these things. I couldn’t taste the coffee going down my throat. I couldn’t feel the water of my shower... Sign in to see full entry.

One year ago today I realized that somehow during the events in my life I had become afraid of the world. I couldn’t do anything without having a panic attack. I could no longer go shopping, or eat in a restaurant, or see a movie, or hear the ringing of my phone without wanting to jump out of my... Sign in to see full entry.

So there I was, standing in an isle at the grocery store when my soul plunged out of my body. In an instant everything went silent. Children were screaming in shopping carts, women were talking on their cell phones, but I heard nothing. Imagine for a moment that you are standing in a very large room... Sign in to see full entry.

It has been raining for days. As I stood on the cold concrete of the basement floor staring out of a small window I remember that days like these always make me sad. They make me think that someday god will realize what I'm doing and smite me for it, but until then I'll keep watching her. I like... Sign in to see full entry.

"Jen, you certainly have a wild imagination." "Yea, my mom used to read me a lot of fairy tales as a kid." "When I was a little girl, my mother used to tell me the same fairy tale over and over again. As she got older, her memory got worse. Sometimes she would tell me the story several times a day."... Sign in to see full entry.

So there I was, sitting in my car at 5 am in front of a rundown building. It's so cold I can see my breath in the air. I would turn on the heater, but my car is about to run out of gas, so there is really no point. I'm not sure why, but I do this every morning. After ten years of working at the same... Sign in to see full entry.