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- Go to CHRISTMAS DINNER WITH MAMA...WELL, KINDA...
I'm going through a lot of the same Krisles. She finally agreed to go to rehab after being hospitalized 5 times in the past year and no end in sight with trip #6
posted by
Annicita
on December 17, 2015 at 3:52 PM
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Krisles-- great story, capturing all the nuances of this episode with your mother, whose memory is failing. But she is still sharp as a tack in other ways. She knows you better than anyone else, and she is playing you like a fiddle. My elderly mother does similar things to me. When she asks me loaded questions, that could open up a vicious can of worms, I am careful to agree with her, even though I don't really agree with her, just to get past that particular mine in the minefield, to guide her to where we need to go (like your Christmas dinner). But sometimes, if it is a vital issue, I don't agree with her and stand my ground. You are doing similarly, and you are a wise and loving daughter. 
posted by
GoldenMean
on December 13, 2015 at 1:27 AM
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Oh my, my
You are so wonderful. If you knew how many have never seen any family since they became residents. They need love in the moment more than you know. This was a beautiful post.
posted by
Justi
on December 12, 2015 at 1:32 PM
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I hear you. As she grew older, I became my mother's support system too - the one she depended on, the one who had to guess many times what Mom really wanted, and who felt guilty when I was wrong...often enough it seemed. It's gut wrenching sometimes. Hang in there - Ciel's advice is wise.
posted by
adnohr
on December 12, 2015 at 10:03 AM
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It is amazing just how quickly things can change in a short period of time.
posted by
FormerStudentIntern
on December 12, 2015 at 6:40 AM
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Krisles
With all the aggro and the sad fact that her faculties are diminished, what comes through most strongly for me is the amazing bond you have with your Mom, which touched me when I first read a post you had written about her, years ago...
posted by
Nautikos
on December 11, 2015 at 12:25 PM
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Well K I am afraid one has to just go with the flow, many cannot cope when a parent turns aggressive through no fault of their own. Your Mum seems content which is a blessing. One day perhaps the potential trauma of aging will be solved, saving much heartbreak.
posted by
C_C_T
on December 11, 2015 at 6:40 AM
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I admire your self awareness, most importantly, that you recognize you're still a child in all of this.
posted by
WeatheredLight
on December 11, 2015 at 5:56 AM
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It takes courage and patience,
Not just with her, but especially with yourself. So many things don't, finally, matter. Making today a good day does. Go easy!
posted by
Ciel
on December 10, 2015 at 9:57 PM
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