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- Go to Dont Flake Out On Me.
I'm one for calling a spade a spade.
posted by
FormerStudentIntern
on March 27, 2010 at 5:33 PM
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I think we all reach our breaking point and it is best to air things that are bothering us as opposed to keeping them locked away! It is a recurring theme and only time will tell if it was the right thing to do! I am sure she will see the big picture and be more responsive to your meaning of 'flaking out.' sam
posted by
sam444
on March 27, 2010 at 10:52 AM
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is it because she makes too many plans and cant keep them all? my daughter does that she thinks she is superwoman and can do all that she plans, its not on purpose but I am not as important as other events or people
posted by
Lanetay
on March 27, 2010 at 8:26 AM
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It all depends of how your relationship with her is ... which I think you have told us already with the admission that for many years you did not say anything about something that bother you so much. So perhaps you should just let it be and it will die off on its own. I am the kind of person though that has to talk about things. Since it it already out If I were you I would call her or better even sit with her and discuss the problem, tell her how many times she hurt you with her thoughtlessness but assure her that you love her at the beginning and every so often during the conversation. People don't change but they do adjust their behavior when they know its not acceptable... All this is your fault too for not letting her know what she was doing was not all good with you, she might have assumed it was OK! So own up your part of the guilt. Don't expect for her to come up and admit it... She knows or will know how you feel and perhaps will correct her behavior a little and what is more important see it in her daughter . I would not mention her daughter by the way... Remember that you might not be the first person calling her a flake... because if she acted like that with you chances are she did with other people, so don't be too harsh. Good luck :-) xoxo
posted by
Sinome
on March 27, 2010 at 7:09 AM
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It won't change her, but it will make her more aware.
posted by
Pat_B
on March 27, 2010 at 7:00 AM
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will iit change her? probably not, but wiill it change me?
I dont know yet what the result will be, I do know she was very upset. thank you for the comments, and the good ideas on how to handle things, it really does help when someone is listening.
posted by
Tzippy
on March 27, 2010 at 6:27 AM
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I think something had to be said...but will it change her? that's the
question now.
posted by
Ariala
on March 27, 2010 at 5:12 AM
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1 Oh I didn’t realize that a flake’s a tardy person. Good luck with her love. BCA, Bill’s R$st
posted by
BC-A
on March 27, 2010 at 4:23 AM
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It's really hard to wait around for someone, then have them cancel
last minute or just not show up. I think you've waited just about as long as you could.
posted by
Afzal_Sunny7
on March 26, 2010 at 11:46 PM
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No!! I think you should've said something sooner. I have many friends like this. For some reason, I have always been one to bite back the irritations and grin and bear it. This is one thing that truly gets on my nerves, though. Life is too short to wait around for someone that does not value your time, or the time that you spend together. Whenever I make plans like that, now, I'll try to get a few more reliable people together besides the "flakes" and casually mention, "We're leaving at 4:00, you're welcome to come. Of course, you'll probably flake out..." This has the effect of being light-hearted and jokey, and usually makes them want to prove that they're not flaky. If they do flake out after all, then you're not stuck alone, either :)
posted by
calia14
on March 26, 2010 at 10:25 PM
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