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Re: You are a great writer, keep up the great work
Thank you, when I make my first million, I'll remember you. Thanks for your encouragement
posted by
muley12
on December 11, 2008 at 5:41 PM
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You are a great writer, keep up the great work
I know you'll go far in your writing career.....so sorry for all you are going through...keep your chin up, my friend.
posted by
hazel_st_cricket
on December 11, 2008 at 5:35 PM
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posted by
hazel_st_cricket
on December 11, 2008 at 5:22 PM
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Re: troosha: that certainly makes sense. thank you
posted by
muley12
on December 11, 2008 at 8:54 AM
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Muley
I suspect it’s a self-protective mechanism that kicks in – ambivalence would still keep us vulnerable whereas switching into hate mode (be it distorted thinking or not) insulates us.
posted by
Troosha
on December 11, 2008 at 8:47 AM
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It really just comes down to ego.
When someone we love hurts us, it's not our heart that is broken, but our ego...our pride. We feel rejected, disrespected. This perspective keeps us from feeling like a victim and realizing our own limitations. That's how I see it anyway.
posted by
Fledgeling_Phoenix
on December 10, 2008 at 6:11 PM
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Forgot to add, Muley..your writing is always inspiration for thought!
posted by
adnohr
on December 10, 2008 at 11:04 AM
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Maybe because we let those we love see our vulnerability..
which, for most of us, is a very private part accessible only to those we do love. A separation hurts both parties, no matter who initiates the end, and each will feel betrayed..betrayal begats anger..anger begats hate.
posted by
adnohr
on December 10, 2008 at 11:02 AM
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Hmmmm..you have me pondering love.. or Love..
~Peace, OTA
posted by
Blue_feathers
on December 10, 2008 at 7:31 AM
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Good post
I'm up and down like a seesaw sometimes but I think it's often more about me and my state of mind, tiredness etc than the people concerned
posted by
malcolm
on December 10, 2008 at 5:59 AM
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I beleive the extreme opposing emotions towards these people is because
we are hurt by them and we care/d for them; with other people it is so much easier to forget about them and let it go; super write my friend; many blessings and thanks
posted by
mariaki
on December 10, 2008 at 2:42 AM
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Here's how I see it...
Example....my now ex-husband and I were married for about 10 years. He cheated on me, I KNEW it, he didn't admit it (even after all my pleas to just admit it so we could move on or things will be BAD.) A year went by and he noticed I was emotionally and physically distancing myself from him. He finally admitted it but by then, I was "emotionally gone."
DONE. Too little, too late kinda thing. I agreed to go to counseling but even that...it was too late. I asked for a divorce and he cried and begged me not to leave him, but I knew in my mind and heart it wouldn't be be the same or fair to either of us in the future because I would always remember and feel the hurt. HOWEVER, I forgave him. Not for him per se, but for ME. He called me a few months after our divorce just to tell me he HATED me and always will.
posted by
SpitFire70
on December 9, 2008 at 11:38 PM
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Such magnificent insight! I have witnessed this! Excellent post Mike! I have a couple of friends that I would love to pass this on to! Thank you! sam
posted by
sam444
on December 9, 2008 at 8:24 PM
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I agree with you totally if one is speaking of romantic love... in that one case it is true that one can not hate someone that one has not loved or has the capacity to love, one can dislike them intensely... be disgusted by them...but hate them? no, for that one needs to feel passion. Great post Mike!
posted by
Sinome
on December 9, 2008 at 7:59 PM
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Hummm....
posted by
Whacky
on December 9, 2008 at 6:46 PM
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The line seems to get thinner with some all the time. Good thoughts!
posted by
Texas_Gem
on December 9, 2008 at 6:28 PM
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somehow I'd like to believe my dear, that the measure of both Love and Hate is also the scale of how much you can endure and pour of each one for a person(s). The sanity of both reverberates on the depth of its longevity in every heart...when you hit the bottom there's no other way but to go up...when you hit the extreme of hate there's no other way but to succumb to love and vise versa. Your words are well conceived fine sir.
posted by
__Purple_Mermaid11__
on December 9, 2008 at 6:17 PM
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Love is just that the other side of the coin
It's when we feel indifference that the relationship be it friendship, someone we are related to or a love in our life, is over. Actually you have answered the question yourself very well just by writing it out.
posted by
Kabu
on December 9, 2008 at 5:51 PM
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