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Jaz....a good post about a more complex issue than sex or respect
Is it an impass of a deeper issue regarding one wanting to be pregnant and the other not? I would get to the bottom of the deeper issue; seems both the apology and the sex are bandaides of a deeper issue, you may both be avoiding; you requiring a sincere apology and hubby requesting the benefit without the repercussion. It's funny how we can view things superficially without seeing a deeper issue but your truth was written here in black and white. My prayers are with you. ~Blessings~
posted by
roadscross
on December 21, 2007 at 7:48 PM
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Saul
Thank you for your words. I heard everything that you said. In the logical part of my brain I knew most of that already. It's just sometimes the emotional side of me gets so frustrated and pissed off that I forget and then when I vent I come out sounding like a (insert nasty word here). I am not that way. But you are right I just want understanding, and I wanted to know that his apology was genuine, and not just telling me what I wanted to hear.
posted by
jaz1181
on December 21, 2007 at 12:40 PM
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Don't overcomplicate this issue, jaz. Men are animals about sex. It's not
about romance or babies -- it's about sex. Part of the problem may be that you think he should be more concerned about pregnancy, your feelings, and less demanding about sex. This makes you angry because he isn't empathic enough. Sadly, he may never be. But you want to work on a mutual understanding. Tell him exactly what you think and try not to get pissed off when he reverts to thinking of you in stereotype (which he probably will), then proving it by saying something stupid and insensitive. Just remember, men are usually conditioned by other men and society to be insensitive, unromantic, nonempathic, unsympathetic, more simple and practical (these are arguable), and more sexually aggressive. Men in general are not very good at effective relationship dynamics. Don't hold it against him; use it to your advantage to build a more mutually empathic relationship...
posted by
saul_relative
on December 21, 2007 at 11:16 AM
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posted by
afzal50
on December 21, 2007 at 8:13 AM
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There are two sides two ever situation>>>is this about having a baby or what? sam
posted by
sam444
on December 21, 2007 at 6:48 AM
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hmmmmm, u know what work for you....
posted by
star4sky5
on December 21, 2007 at 4:50 AM
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