Go to Divorce Therapy
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- Go to Will Blogit be my much Needed Divorce Therapy?
RaeS
I hope I can be in that place soon.
posted by
le_divorcee
on August 30, 2007 at 7:16 PM
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Quite a few years ago; much healing has taken place since - both ways
posted by
Katray2
on August 30, 2007 at 6:47 PM
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cpklapper
The main reason to join a community like this is the fraternity you find here, right?
You do sound quite giddy and excited. I hope that turns out well for you. 
posted by
le_divorcee
on August 30, 2007 at 6:41 PM
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RaeS
Thank you for your advice. I am not planning on getting serious with anyone anytime soon. I don't want to end in the same situation and I want to fix some of my issues before I can try to be happy with someone again. How long have you been divorced?
P.S. Interesting theory... LOL
posted by
le_divorcee
on August 30, 2007 at 6:40 PM
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Blogit has been that for me as well
Though I started after the divorce was complete. It has been very reaffirming to have people comment on my poems and other writings that came out of the divorce or out of my love interests afterwards. You may find yourself taking wild swings of emotion particularly in romance during and after the divorce. Think of it as love release and, as such, it is all good even if nothing comes out of most of it.
Personally, my main love interest and muse, whom I know from work, not from blogit, has recently revealed her feelings for me through a friend of mine -- the latest is whenever he mentions my name to her, she blushes and has a big smile -- so there is light at the end of the tunnel. BTW, there are several twists and turns in the story and many yet to unfold, but it is a very, very happy development. I am positively giddy!
Ahem. So here's wishing the best for you.
Carl Peter
posted by
cpklapper
on August 30, 2007 at 4:30 PM
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Divorce feels like the ultimate failure; despite knowing it's the best
thing for all parties involved. I experienced similar emotions, even though I left him and he didn't want a divorce. There is so much invested in committing yourself to marriage, not surprising I guess that an ending to the relationship causes such intense upheaval. The healing hands of time will move you toward balance and peace. In the meanwhile, I suggest keeping busy and focused on resettling yourself, write often to sort out your feelings, find new friends and activities. And though it's often tempting to start dating again soon after a divorce, I think it's important not to become too serious with anyone for awhile - take some time to enjoy being the entity of you, living life on your terms. My two cents.
p.s. - hope you don't mind me mentioning this, but you sound like someone who has been on Blogit before. If I'm right, nice to see you again, but regrets for the circumstance of your return. If I'm wrong, pardon my error and chalk it up to us old timers here behaving a little senile sometimes, LOL.
Welcome, in either case!
posted by
Katray2
on August 30, 2007 at 3:25 PM
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7stars
I think I left just in time... things became very, very ugly.
posted by
le_divorcee
on August 30, 2007 at 1:06 PM
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IF U CAN'T LIVE IN PEACE, LEAVE ON TIME.....NOT EARLY OR TOO LATE
posted by
star4sky5
on August 30, 2007 at 12:29 PM
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Offy
This is so cool! What a welcome I am receiving. Yaiiiii!
posted by
le_divorcee
on August 30, 2007 at 10:25 AM
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I see no reason
Why it can't be your therapy...There are a lot of us in here who are divorced, single, never married, married, and some like me who just live in sin...Sure why not? Welcome to your therapy...
posted by
Offy
on August 30, 2007 at 10:17 AM
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TAPS
Tim and I had no kids (THANK GOD!!!) but I did everything in my power to have it be an amicable divorce. We don't hate each other and speak once in a while about the lose ends that are still being tied.
posted by
le_divorcee
on August 30, 2007 at 10:00 AM
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Very carefully, Le_divorce.
I wanted out, but I did not want to make an enemy of him. After all, we share four children and eight (going to be nine in November) grandchildren. So, we still have to see each other at family functions like graduations and weddings and such.
posted by
TAPS.
on August 30, 2007 at 9:54 AM
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ladyofshalott
You are still considering it? What does he think about it? Tim didn't want to leave me, he wanted for me to be the one to leave him.
posted by
le_divorcee
on August 30, 2007 at 9:52 AM
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Pat_B
That is quite hilarious... How long have you been divorced?
posted by
le_divorcee
on August 30, 2007 at 9:51 AM
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I'm sorry for you....you will find people to relate to here.
I am in a similar situation....considering divorce after 10 years of issues. Welcome to blogit!!! It'll be an addiction, watch out
posted by
ladyofshalott
on August 30, 2007 at 9:51 AM
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TAPS
30 years!? I can't wrap my head around that. That is so, so sad. How did you deal with such a blow?
posted by
le_divorcee
on August 30, 2007 at 9:50 AM
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It takes time to get your balance back, to walk like a free woman
in the world. But you will get it back if you really want it. I kept in my mind something I heard somewhere about the best revenge -- living well. And a few years down the road something happened that made me laugh:
I was walking on the street when I noticed this guy coming toward me. At first I thought it was my ex, and my face showed my surprise. The guy caught came up to me. He was a panhandler, and as I doled out a few quarters, I had to grin. The ultimate fantasy, my ex, begging for spare change on the street. I'd never actually thought about it before the chance meeting, but I've laughed about it ever since. Harmless and healing...
posted by
Pat_B
on August 30, 2007 at 9:49 AM
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le_divorce
Thank you for visiting my blog and making a comment. If you had not done that, it might have been a long time before I noticed you were here. Welcome to Blogit. I'm sure you will find friends here that you will love to pieces. Yes, I am divorced. I was married for thirty years before that came to be. No matter how short or how long one is married, it is still a terrible shock that marriage is not that be all/end all that we expect it to be when we get married.
posted by
TAPS.
on August 30, 2007 at 9:44 AM
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