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Thanks Malcolm, I will.

posted by word.smith on January 4, 2006 at 7:45 AM | link to this | reply

I think a sense of perspective
will do him no harm at all. we've had similar issues between our eldest son and his younger siblings and he's needed to be reminded that he's not the adult to their children. Stay with it.

posted by malcolm on January 4, 2006 at 6:16 AM | link to this | reply

Blanche,
Yes, I do believe he thinks that we're on the same level, which is why it's a good thing to remind him now and then that we're not.  

posted by word.smith on January 3, 2006 at 9:26 PM | link to this | reply

Word.smith,
Kids don't like to hear that they're not on the same level as adults, but as archaic as it sounds, I still think that "because I'm the grownup and you're the child" has to be factored into the equation.  He may not like it, but it's the truth. 

posted by Blanche. on January 3, 2006 at 6:23 PM | link to this | reply

MayB,

 

Agreed. He has authoritative tones that come from the way we speak to him., when we mean business.  Even last night he said the same thing to my husband and when he asked him how he'd spoken to him, he said 'in a bad way.' Yikes!

 

 

 

 

posted by word.smith on January 3, 2006 at 6:21 PM | link to this | reply

Silver,

Kids are mini politicians. They learn how to negotiate and manipulate adults if we're not careful.  It's kind of like walking a tightrope when teaching them what's right and how to compromise.  I gotta admit that sometimes it's hard being and staying in charge.

 

posted by word.smith on January 3, 2006 at 6:15 PM | link to this | reply

TF,
The only trouble I'm having with him right now is that he's in a huff more often than I like. He's turning into a manipulative little thing, thinking if he get's in a huff everybody will cave in. I have news for him.

posted by word.smith on January 3, 2006 at 6:08 PM | link to this | reply

Genius, I don't doubt you!

posted by word.smith on January 3, 2006 at 6:06 PM | link to this | reply

Jeff, that comment made me laugh.
Life is an adventure all right for those of us who do have kids.

posted by word.smith on January 3, 2006 at 6:05 PM | link to this | reply

Recently  I stepped up the time out for my daughter when she was answering back - she's only three. Now even the warning of time out stops her.  We do have to watch how we  speak. Sometimes my daughter speaks to her dolls in tones that I realize have only come from me and I don't always like what I hear

posted by Azur on January 3, 2006 at 3:35 PM | link to this | reply

Interesting.  My son is going through something similar.  He's been throwing out disciplinary remarks much like yours is.  And last night, I was angry and short with him because 1. he did not get into bed as I had told him several times before, and 2. he was messing around near the computer table and knocked over an entire cup of water there.  He got angry because I was angry, and when I told him to tone it down, he said, Only after you say sorry to me. ( owning up to mistakes and saying sorry is an important issue in our house)  I said I was right to be angry at him for the reasons I stated above, and that He should say sorry to Me.  It took some convincing, but I felt it was necessary for him to understand that sorry doesn't always go both ways, and if I (or anyone else) is angry with him, then he should first reflect on what happened before he does anything else--especially copping attitude, which is an ugly habit in itself.

posted by SilverMoon7 on January 3, 2006 at 3:15 PM | link to this | reply

My child went through a similiar thing-its part of growing up and learning how to apply laughter, handling emotion and not just there own.

posted by ThomasFranklin on January 3, 2006 at 12:19 PM | link to this | reply

sounds like that that
bid for independence to me.  I did the same...

posted by _the_staggering_genius_ on January 3, 2006 at 12:04 PM | link to this | reply

Thanks for reminding me
why I don't have children

posted by jollyjeff on January 3, 2006 at 10:18 AM | link to this | reply

MerryAnne, thanks.
I hadn't thought about it like that, but yes, it's good to know that he's using the voice he has to take care of himself.

posted by word.smith on January 3, 2006 at 7:24 AM | link to this | reply

Same to you, Meringue!

posted by word.smith on January 3, 2006 at 7:24 AM | link to this | reply

yikes Word
shades of my future!  lol!  There is a positive side to this, at least he won't let people push him around and talk to him in  a mean way (not that you did) this will help him a lot in life.  clearly you are doing a great job.

posted by MerryAnne on January 3, 2006 at 7:04 AM | link to this | reply

with each year, we all grow up a little bit, Happy New Year!

posted by Meringue on January 3, 2006 at 6:49 AM | link to this | reply