Because I Said So

I'm not a drama queen, necessarily... in fact, I HATE drama... but I do tend to speak with flair and use exaggeration as a means of expression. (Hey... it's valid.) Like, if I say it's a THOUSAND degrees outside (which I may or may not have said in the doctor's office today in Medford) what I... Sign in to see full entry.

It’s the LITTLE things that irritate the crap out of me...... which I've no doubt stated before. I can shoulder a lot of BIG crap like a good little soldier... but the little stuff? Gets under my skin, festers, itches, and pretty much drives me screaming batshit crazy. I am currently being reminded... Sign in to see full entry.

(In no particular order of importance) 1. I felt like it. 2. I wanted to. 3. I was hungry. 4. You're an asshole. 5. It was easy and I was bored. 6. Because. 7. If I didn't do it, it wouldn't get done. 8. It was there and so was I. 9. I don't think before I speak or type. 10. I occasionally am... Sign in to see full entry.

This first week back at work after 1 1/2 months lying on the couch in my jammies nursing my massively infected breast (Frankenboob) has seriously, SERIOUSLY kicked my ass and left me with the firm belief that this is NOT the life I ordered. I'm pretty sure that I was supposed to be standing in the... Sign in to see full entry.

I love the fact that taking antibiotics to cure a potentially dangerous (read: fatal) infection can be hazardous to my health. Only two antibiotics can cure this particular infection. I, of course, am allergic to both of them. One of the allergic reactions can leave me comatose and dead, the other... Sign in to see full entry.

Where the hell do my socks and bras go? And my black thermal shirt that has been missing since I wore it October 23rd, 2007? Where are my husband's tan pants? Seriously... I WANT TO KNOW. I just cleaned out my lingerie drawer and wound up throwing away about 20 socks that had no mates. Since I'm not... Sign in to see full entry.

I love having one of those names that can be broken down and simplified from one long eight letter name to a mini-fied four letter one. Danielle to Dani. Both two syllables and yet? Dani seems so much SHORTER than Danielle. Dani is more fun, Dani is smaller, cuter, perkier, more likely to go out,... Sign in to see full entry.

*Author's note: I refuse to be held accountable for anything I write. It's not my fault, I didn't do it, you can't prove it, why does everyone blame me, and I'm rubber, you're glue. Just so you know. Remember when you were little and you'd get "a cough"? Back in The Day, when I was a Youngster... Sign in to see full entry.

It's like crack. I can't stop watching. How Clean Is Your House, You Are What You Eat, Bargain Hunt, Absolutely Fabulous, My Big Breasts and I, My Small Breasts and I... who can resist this stuff? Not me, not me! Since being on Couch Arrest for the past 6-7 weeks, due to post-surgical complications... Sign in to see full entry.

*Author's note: I have three sons... two are currently in the Marine Corps, one stationed in San Diego, the other in Japan. My oldest son is attending art school in Tucson. They're all pretty far away, and yesterday I took my oldest son to the airport after having him visit for a wonderful,... Sign in to see full entry.