Surviving Pedophilia and Other Sexual Abuse

Monday, April 18, 2011

ANSWERED PRAYERS

I was about to move into some kind of strange place that I don't even remember what it was called but similar to a place that "battered women" would stay. I had been praying and praying about what to do and WISHING that I didn't always have to be dependant opon a man & etc. My oldest son was in... Sign in to see full entry.

THE STRAW THAT BROKE THE CAMELS BACK

One morning when I woke the kids up to go to school I noticed that my baby had a little bit of a black eye. When I asked him what happened he told me that his new "Daddy figure" had hit him!! I said where the hek was I? He said you were in the next room but he shook his fist at me as if he would hit... Sign in to see full entry.

WHAT WAS I THINKING?

My baby was just out of the 6th grade when he moved up here with me to have yet another "Daddy figure"...........I think he really tried but how could he identify with a man so much older than himself that expected perfection out of everyone? He missed his step Dad like crazy. Can't say I blame him... Sign in to see full entry.

Sunday, April 17, 2011

Can't Believe I Left This Out!

During the "marriage of convenience time" FOUR of my kids were in a car wreck! Only my baby wasn't with them. Thank God!! There is six years between my oldest and my daughter. Those kids were always together on week ends. I let them take my car for something. I don't remember why but it doesn't... Sign in to see full entry.

ANOTHER FIVE YEARS OF MY LIFE

This relationship went on for another five years of my life. This man wanted me to marry him but I opted to "live with him" because I was never quite comfortable with the way he and my children got along. When he spoke of them they were "bad actors" and he was correct but they were mine and I loved... Sign in to see full entry.

Friday, April 15, 2011

SELFISH DECISION AND I ADMIT IT!

I admit I made a very selfish decision to move to the KC area with this man. Two of the kids that were with me were in high school at the time and my baby was in the 6th grade. I moved here before school let out and they remained with their step Dad and finished their school years out. None of them... Sign in to see full entry.

Didn't Go Out of My Way

I wasn't "out to find someone else" someone else found me. I was working at a motel as a desk clerk at this point in time to help out. It was a motel for railroaders only. My hours were ever changing and sometimes I was on the graveyard shift. That's when the guys wanted to hang around the desk,... Sign in to see full entry.

Thursday, April 14, 2011

WHAT HAPPENED?

I wasn't in love with the man I married so I guess it was inevitible that I would be attracted to other men. I really wanted to stay with him until all my kids graduated high school for their sake but I just couldn't do it. After five years we got an amicable divorce. I took nothing from him and... Sign in to see full entry.

Wednesday, April 13, 2011

Marriage of Convenience

I met a man at the meat packing plant that wasn't nice looking at all but he was a nice guy. He'd never been married before and he was totally the opposite of my kids' Dad so we gave it a shot. My kids absolutely adored this man and we made this work for nearly five years. My two oldest still chose... Sign in to see full entry.

COULDN'T HANDLE IT LONG ENOUGH

My kids were in that foster home for a whole summer but I really needed six - eight months to do what I really wanted to do and that was to get my GED and then go to business school. Once again I decided the timing wasn't right and that I NEEDED to do what was necessary to get my kids back.... Sign in to see full entry.

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