By TIMMYTALES - About Me - E-mail this page - Add to My Favorites - Add to Blog List - See other blogs in Opinion

Wednesday, August 18, 2010

If You Have Not Seen This, You Really Need To! BANNED AND HILARIOUS

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Husband Down!

A husband and his wife are shopping at their local Wal-Mart. The husband picks up a case of Budweiser and puts it in their cart. "What do you think you're doing?" asks the wife. "They're on sale, Babe, only $10 for 24 cans." he replies. "Put them back, you know we can't afford them" demands the... Sign in to see full entry.

Tuesday, August 17, 2010

A Cardiologists's Funeral

A prominent cardiologist died, and was given a very elaborate funeral by the hospital he worked for for most of his life.......a huge heart......covered in flowers stood behind the casket during the service as all the doctors from the hospital sat in awe. Following the eulogy, the heart opened, and... Sign in to see full entry.

Monday, August 16, 2010

Words and Their Meaning

Obama was visiting a primary school and he visited one of the classes. They were in a discussion related to words and their meanings. The teacher asked the president if he would like to lead the discussion on the word 'tragedy'. So our illustrious president asked the class for an example of a... Sign in to see full entry.

Sunday, August 15, 2010

Mark Your Calendars! Weed out Terrorism

Walk naked in America Day is coming soon. Mark your calendars. As you know it is a sin for a muslim male to see any woman other than his wife naked, and if he does, he must commit suicide. So, next Saturday at 1:00 pm eastern time, all American women are asked to walk out of their house completely... Sign in to see full entry.

Saturday, August 14, 2010

Why We Can't Post The Ten Commandments in a Courthouse

The real reason that we cannot have the Ten Commandments posted in a courthouse is this- you cannot post "thou shalt not steal, thou shalt not commit adultery,and Thou shalt not lie" in a building full of judges, lawyers and politicians.....it creates a hostile work environment. Sign in to see full entry.

Friday, August 13, 2010

Life Thoughts...

How come we choose from just two people to run for president and over fifty for Miss America? Now that food has replaced sex in my life, I can't even get into my own pants! When I was young I used to go skinny dipping, now I just chunky dunk. Wouldn't it be nice if whenever we messed up our life we... Sign in to see full entry.

Thursday, August 12, 2010

A Warning To Men

Women often receive warnings about protecting themselves at the mall and in dark parking lots,etc. This is the first warning I have seen for men. I wanted to pass it along in case you have not heard about it. Take Heed!! A heads up for those men who may be regular customers at Home Depot, Lowes,... Sign in to see full entry.

Saturday, August 7, 2010

Slapped Silly

I was walking through the mall the other day when I noticed a woman with extremely large ta-ta's. She was wearing a shirt that said "Guess" on it. I walked up to her, read her shirt and said "Implants?" She slapped me. Sign in to see full entry.

Tuesday, August 3, 2010

Back Off and Back Away!

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