BarbWriter

You just gotta love this guy from Moosonee. (For those of you living below the border, Moosonee is close to Hudson's Bay. And if you don't know where Hudson's Bay is, get yourselves a map of Canada.) Anyway, this guy from Moosonee is a favorite blogger of mine. You can't help but admire a man who puts himself in the middle of the tracks, daring the Ontario Northland Railway train to hit him. He's either got suicidal tendencies or a what-the-hell mentality. I really like a guy who takes chances,... Sign in to see full entry.

Miss Joy? Yes. This is the bail program at Toronto court house. Yes. What is it? Your nephew gave us your name. He is in custody and thought you might provide bail for him. Oh. What is he in jail for? Suspicion of possession. Oh dear. How much is the bail? Well, it's set by the judge and could be as little as $500. Well, that's all right, then. I don't want to see him in jail any longer than necessary. There's one other thing, though. I see he doesn't have a place to stay after he gets out.... Sign in to see full entry.

And so to end Mike's story - and mine: The devastating experiences we both faced in that old system have killed Mike's chances of ever leading a productive life. On the bleak side, he now distrusts the medical profession and won't even go for a check-up. He squints horribly but won't see an eye doctor. The medication has almost blinded him and probably damaged his liver but he's so used to it now that he won't give it up or try something less harmful. He shuns social events, takes his dinner... Sign in to see full entry.

When I read Mike's psychiatric history that I recently got from the hospital, I want to weep. I can imagine that first day when he woke up in the ward with 10 other beds in a row filled with slumbering souls. "What am I doing here?" he must have asked himself. And then dressing and shuffling off to breakfast with an aide's instructions of how to get there. Then more medication that made him dizzy and strange. Nothing to do but wander the halls until somebody called him in to ask questions he had... Sign in to see full entry.

And so began the Isolation of Mike. It seemed as though a shroud of shame had descended over him. In getting sick, he had obviously done something terribly wrong because his father, brothers and the rest of the family quickly deserted him. Except for his grandmother who, once in a while, would say: "Poor Mike. Say hello to him for me when you see him." As often as I could Icrawled into my battered car and unwillingly made the trek to the hospital. The first time I visited Mike shortly after his... Sign in to see full entry.

It was the toughest thing in the world to walk out of that hospital and leave my forlorn son sitting there among strangers. Looking back on it now I should have taken Mike out of there but, you see, I trusted the "professionals" instead of my own heart. They knew what was best, didn't they? I kept trusting them throughout the ensuing years. Even when Mike tried to leap out of the barred windows of that institution; even when he escaped it to find his way home with no money in his pocket; even... Sign in to see full entry.

And so began the journey. I first took him to the family doctor who could find nothing wrong. Then a psychiatrist who said Mike was lacking discipline and the army would be the best place for him. (I've since learned that he advised all his patients to do just that.) And then a conference with his teachers who said Mike, although intelligent, was falling behind in his grades. My son was called into the room with his teachers, took one look, and fled. And then came that fateful Hallowe'en night... Sign in to see full entry.

MIKE From the living room window I watched him tossing the football around with his brother. They were playing on the quiet residential street where we lived. Suddenly he broke off the game to pick up some pieces of paper lying in the ditch. As I watched, a pang of worry hit me. A day later I went out to the patio to hang a few bits of clothing on the six-armed line in the back yard. Two of its arms were broken. With sudden realization, the worry that had rested in my stomach raced to my brain.... Sign in to see full entry.

FALLING ON YOUR FACE I once read a book by James Morris Jr. that offered practical advice to anyone wanting to talk more openly and freely with others. A chapter in The Art of Conversation deals with motivating people to do what you want them to. Morris advocates letting the other guy rid himself of all his objections to whatever proposal you put forward. After the speaker calms down and gets his feelings off his chest, he'll be far more receptive to your plan. I thought it was a pretty good... Sign in to see full entry.

IN PERSONAL RELATIONSHIPS Have you lost a friend lately? I don't mean through death but through lack of communication. With all the emotions that we humans are beset with, it isn't so surprising that we sometimes mentally demote a "true friend" to an "acquaintance " or even eventually to an "enemy". Maybe the former friend deserted you when he detected a note of derision in a remark you thought was perfectly innocent. Or perhaps you became defensive when his teasing hid criticism you thought was... Sign in to see full entry.