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Re: WileyJohn
Well God BLess you Dr J, that was such a helpful response. Imagine, 77 years and they never stopped treating me as the "kid brother". I am happy to be free.
posted by
WileyJohn
on July 24, 2013 at 9:10 PM
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lovelyladymonk
Previously I told people off quick fast and in a hurry. I started getting feedback that I needed to look a my public relations when only one side was getting heard. I think this is when issues started to arise. I should have maintained so that there would never been a question of whether to approach me in disrespectful ways or not. I am slowly regaining my swagger as the newbies are saying these days and it feels good. Thanks
posted by
Dr_JPT
on July 24, 2013 at 7:34 AM
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CC-T
You are right and they try to force me to remain the same because they are the same. This is not happening. Thank you and I will. For a long time, I did. They have become to aggressive. I must put them in check or get way away from them.
posted by
Dr_JPT
on July 24, 2013 at 7:28 AM
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lionreign
You have the name to match your brilliance. That in my opinion is exactly why many get into positions of authority to legitimize their right to boss wok owing full well they have to right to impose their unbalance on others!
posted by
Dr_JPT
on July 24, 2013 at 7:25 AM
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Justi
I tend to my business. The people seek and stay in my circle even when told and shown they are unwelcome by me. They gain access via my husband and sons.
posted by
Dr_JPT
on July 24, 2013 at 7:20 AM
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Mariss9
Thanks. I have tried a combination of your suggestions. They get resentful then come at me in a pair. I keep doing what I do. 
posted by
Dr_JPT
on July 24, 2013 at 7:17 AM
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We all have the right to our own individualism. I find myself going through this from time to time myself, but have finally learned to tell people off!
posted by
lovelyladymonk
on July 23, 2013 at 1:20 PM
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Yes the trouble is Doc. they know you probably as you were before and treat you as such. I am afraid I deal with my brother in the same way, but unlike you he is sometimes extremely sarcastic and does try to take me down with his superior knowledge. I don't think you should become meaner, because you will receive sarcasm. Anyway why does it matter, you are intelligent and have risen above your peers, it is just a little cross you have to bear, an emotional hillock . I would just sit upon it and smile.
posted by
C_C_T
on July 23, 2013 at 9:10 AM
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Of course you could also wonder about those who seek positions where they can claim authority to boss people about, are they equally unbalanced and just better able to for strategies to legitimise their unbalance?
posted by
lionreign
on July 23, 2013 at 2:56 AM
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I find if I spend half my time attending my business and the othe half staying out of other's business I am full time busy. Don't know what that equates to mentally but makes me happy. 
posted by
Justi
on July 22, 2013 at 10:38 PM
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Give them a piece of your mind, and see if it helps. Let go of fear and false guilt and see if you do not feel better. They will run over you as long as they can if they are in the habit. Avoiding them may be good too since constant conflict is not good.
posted by
mariss9
on July 22, 2013 at 9:16 PM
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WileyJohn
Wonderful and it does not matter if they speak to you again or not. I have done this many times and the ones I report on and the one reported to they become tight after having talked bad about one or the other. This apparently is the way some women operate and it is ridiculous. I don't like dealing with it but it seems to follow me!
posted by
Dr_JPT
on July 22, 2013 at 8:23 PM
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KABU
You are so right. I am in the process now. I just hate moving from the property that has been in our family for years, but realize it is a must for my well being. I believe in family stability and going through good and bad times but in in-laws who have come into our family have destroyed it and there is no use of me maintaining any hope that they will understand respect or decency. I only hope my grandchildren will not follow their mom's ways nor my son's ways of accepting and allowing, supporting and protecting disrespectful people in the name of lust and nastiness.
posted by
Dr_JPT
on July 22, 2013 at 8:18 PM
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JimmyA
You explained it well but they are like the lady in the movie 50 FIRST DATES. They forget and it is irritating to continually have to spell out boundaries to folk who are grown and old and should know better but act like 12 year olds.
posted by
Dr_JPT
on July 22, 2013 at 8:11 PM
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Naut
I cannot tune these people out. If I could slap them or use profane language on them, that would stop them for that is all they understand for they are so ignorant!! Both of these will land me in prison like my brother. They are like these whacky people in movies who cannot stop until you silence them for good.
posted by
Dr_JPT
on July 22, 2013 at 8:08 PM
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BC-A
They go away and return.
posted by
Dr_JPT
on July 22, 2013 at 8:02 PM
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FormerStudentIntern
They really can.
posted by
Dr_JPT
on July 22, 2013 at 8:01 PM
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Dr JPT
A real life post, I found it so helpful. I was the youngest in a family of 8 children. Everybody was above me telling me what to do. With one of my siblings, the oldest living sister of three, who is 87 now, just never let go. There is another troubling sister 7 years older, 80, and they talk and write to each other. Well I received quite a few e-mails from the older one, who said vile things about her younger sister, so I mailed those e-mails to the younger sister. It's 2 months since I did that and now I know they won't be annoying me anymore.My psychotherapist of 33 years had told me when they threw the ball of of upsetting words, don't pick up the ball.Thank you for your post.
posted by
WileyJohn
on July 22, 2013 at 7:55 PM
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Dr JPT
A real life post, I found it so helpful. I was the youngest in a family of 8 children. Everybody was above me telling me what to do. With one of my siblings, the oldest living sister of three, who is 87 now, just never let go. There is another troubling sister 7 years older, 80, and they talk and write to each other. Well I received quite a few e-mails from the older one, who said vile things about her younger sister, so I mailed those e-mails to the younger sister. It's 2 months since I did that and now I know they won't be annoying me anymore.My psychotherapist of 33 years had told me when they threw the ball of of upsetting words, don't pick up the ball.Thank you for your post.
posted by
WileyJohn
on July 22, 2013 at 7:53 PM
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you need to move away a little distance yourself and practice saying No...My sister tries to boss me still and I just ignore her and go my own Merry way. Otherwise we would fight and she is over 70 now and I don't want to fight...nor will I be treated like a 3 year old. I just leave.
posted by
Kabu
on July 22, 2013 at 6:11 PM
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DrJ
I guess I'm lucky - I don't have any busybodies in my family. The odd one I run into elsewhere I just tune out...
posted by
Nautikos
on July 22, 2013 at 1:44 PM
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It appears that one aspect of your blog might deal with people "living in glass houses," while another aspect may be for people to learn to be more assertive and less easily manipulated. There is a happy medium of course, but it does take a little effort, something some people either just aren't capable of performing, or simply have no desire to try! "Speak when spoken to", and "live and let live" might be good axioms to live by as well . . .
posted by
JimmyA
on July 22, 2013 at 1:23 PM
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Hope they're busy elsewhere love.
posted by
BC-A
on July 22, 2013 at 12:00 PM
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I think I agree with you...
posted by
Saif_AlKindi
on July 22, 2013 at 11:31 AM
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Those bossy people can be such a pain.
posted by
FormerStudentIntern
on July 22, 2013 at 10:53 AM
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Blue Feathers
It is difficult I when alone and thoughts bring the to fore front or cannot get away from people who have little control over there mouth. Thanks for sharing.
posted by
Dr_JPT
on July 22, 2013 at 9:48 AM
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I am learing not to worry about what others say or think...
posted by
Blue_feathers
on July 22, 2013 at 9:11 AM
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UtahJay
I know what you mean. I just detest listening and in family gatherings I have no choice for these people will return to the topic no matter how often subject is changed. They must have the last word and mumble or hum when others are talking, especially me. Enjoy your ride and trip.
posted by
Dr_JPT
on July 22, 2013 at 9:10 AM
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LostInLife
Perfect verse!
posted by
Dr_JPT
on July 22, 2013 at 9:06 AM
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Theses are those I pay no attention to...Great post today...We are leaving Colorado for Utah...read you again when we get there.
posted by
UtahJay
on July 22, 2013 at 8:37 AM
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Oh man...
I suffer this from almost everyone..
my response - always and it always fits like a glove!
Luke 6:41
posted by
SomeoneElse
on July 22, 2013 at 8:16 AM
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