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One Betty....
Please do not apologize for such a beautiful post. Thank you for sharing this. It was a gift. God bless you and your sons.
posted by
Justi
on October 6, 2007 at 7:10 PM
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If majority rules this to be a soap box,....
...make room for me! I raised two boys as a single mother, from the ages 4 and 2. I was fortunate to have, somehow, been blessed with the ultimate gift of burden. The burden of responsibility to "own up" to the decision "I" made to become a young mother. No one forced me to have children. It was a decision I made, on my own. At 24 years old, I was faced with an unexpected change of plans - divorce. I was uneducated and completely inexperienced in the workplace. I come from a humble, middle class upbringing, so supporting my children financially was something I was not prepared for. But, I realized that, no matter how unfortunate, how unfair or how impossible my broken plan seemed to be, I had no one to blame or question, but myself. As you say...there, but for the grace of God, go I. I don't know why I was fortunate enough to have been blessed with the best lesson in parenting, but I do know it was a gift and I could have just as easily found myself in the same, negative position so many young women do. With that, I found myself understanding an obligation that I had to the children I "chose" to bring into the world, as well as an obligation to the world I would someday launch them into. So, thankfully, I was able to do the very best I could, as a parent and good citizen, simply by always keeping my #1 priority in place. Dating, playing and career choices were all based on the impact it would have on my children, without fail. In retrospect, even though I took a career path that sacrificed all creativity and dreams I once had, I was able to provide a fine existence for my children with no public assistance or financial family support to speak of. And, even though I may have missed an opportunity to find another boyfriend, husband or father figure for my boys, I have no regrets. My sons are 21 & 23 now and they've grown up to be very loving, caring and beautiful souls. I was fortunate enough to be an exception to the rule and without so much as a high school diploma, have been able to achieve a very respectible position and financially rewarding career in the mortgage industry.
I am proud of myself, my sons and my life - but I never lose site of the fact that I was simply fortunate to somehow be driven by that burden of responsibility to my children and society.
Thanks for posting such an important subject
Appologies for the lengthy comment - it just came out as I began to ponder and reflect
.
posted by
OneBetty
on October 6, 2007 at 1:42 PM
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Taps
I am only walking in my calling as you and many, many other Christians do. I am nothing special and do nothing special. God does things through me. I do sincerely appreciate your having respect for me, that from you is golden.
posted by
Justi
on October 3, 2007 at 3:15 PM
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Nautikos
I do understand what you are saying. I don't think it is sympathy she needs, it is help and instruction. Had that been me at that age with that kind of money I certainly can't say what I would have done. Parenting is difficult enough without all the extra attention.
posted by
Justi
on October 3, 2007 at 3:12 PM
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Troosha
People have no clue until they have tried it. Being rich to a normal point is a tremendous help if the parent or parents have a head on their shoulders. The other side of that coin is a very hard road to walk. Been there done that and danged Tee Shirt wore out totally. Thank you for the wonderful comment.
posted by
Justi
on October 3, 2007 at 3:09 PM
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Wiley John
Forgivness is not always understood. It is a necessary act! Thank you for the sweet comment.
posted by
Justi
on October 3, 2007 at 3:07 PM
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Afzal
The youth in all countries are the future and should be watched, encouraged and guarded a bit if they are a detriment to themselves or others.
posted by
Justi
on October 3, 2007 at 3:06 PM
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Lou
Thanks lady.
posted by
Justi
on October 3, 2007 at 3:04 PM
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Kabu
I do so appreciate your kind comment.
posted by
Justi
on October 3, 2007 at 3:04 PM
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rich in store
Thank you.
posted by
Justi
on October 3, 2007 at 3:03 PM
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I think you are wonderful, Justi
There are so many women that need help of one kind or another and I have a lot of respect for you for doing what you can.
posted by
TAPS.
on October 3, 2007 at 1:13 PM
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Justi
I feel sorry for the kids, of course! Britney Spears? I just have no use for her and that whole tribe of mindless bimbos! I have a limited capacity for sympathy, and I ain't wasting it on her...
posted by
Nautikos
on October 3, 2007 at 1:01 PM
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posted by
Matie
on October 3, 2007 at 12:18 PM
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Justi
There are no hand books on How to be a Mother – most of us use the lessons we gleaned for our own mother and in some instances that may be more of a detriment than a benefit. Financial adversity plays a huge role in one’s capacity to be a good mother. I’m not suggesting you have to be rich but if making ends meet and putting a humble meal on the table is difficult (or God forbid impossible) the shame and frustration must be unbearable. On the other side of the spectrum, while raising my daughter I witnessed families who had handsome homes, fancy cars, and two working professional parents. Children of these families were often lonely and acted out in a negative way. Parenting is the hardest job. We want to provide as best we can, hope to instill good values, and want our children to feel loved. It’s a difficult juggling act.
posted by
Troosha
on October 3, 2007 at 9:28 AM
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Justi
Quite right luv, a wonedrful post and yes, forgiveness is so very important for all we humans.
posted by
WileyJohn
on October 3, 2007 at 8:07 AM
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posted by
Offy
on October 3, 2007 at 6:30 AM
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I agree with your closing statement which speaks volume of your wise
concern for youngsters .
posted by
afzal50
on October 2, 2007 at 10:03 PM
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Hi and thanks
Thanks for discussing life.. good thoughts.
Lou
posted by
Cameraeye
on October 2, 2007 at 9:28 PM
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No soap box here....just a very wise blogger.
posted by
Kabu
on October 2, 2007 at 8:55 PM
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hi, justi
take care.
posted by
richinstore
on October 2, 2007 at 8:11 PM
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