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Joe,
All of us were kids once, we know the crazy stuff we did. As a parent, it pays to remember those sometimes wild years.
posted by
word.smith
on October 9, 2005 at 4:17 PM
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word.smith
I couldn't agree with you more. Watching your kids like a hawk, not trusting them to make good decisions (due to immaturity), is a great piece of advice, and the practice will undoubtedly pay off in the long run.
posted by
Joe_Love
on October 8, 2005 at 9:59 PM
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Rhiannon, I agree that even if he doesn't face charges,
life has a way of paying us back for unrighted wrongs.
posted by
word.smith
on October 4, 2005 at 9:56 AM
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Pat,
Thanks, she told me that they did get the morning after pill and I suppose that they will have to test again for HIV further down the road. I agree that it is good that they can talk about what happened.
posted by
word.smith
on October 4, 2005 at 9:55 AM
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The daughter
has to be strong. Pursue justice in man's court, even if it is painful--its empowering. She's saying she won't take it. God's justice will catch up with the boy who did this, and probably in this life time. My heart goes out to everyone involved. Rhiannon1
posted by
Rhiannon1
on October 3, 2005 at 7:40 PM
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at least she's talking about it
and getting started on the healing process. Some people keep such invasions hidden inside where they tick away like time bombs and destroy lives and marriages years later.
The toughest thing a parent has to face is the knowledge that no matter how careful they are, they can't protect a child 24-7. Counsel your friend to make sure the girl gets medical attention, including morning after birth control and tests for STDs... It's a hard situation that demands a hard response.
posted by
Pat_B
on October 3, 2005 at 5:41 AM
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Spitfire,
It does rankle a bit to hear that about victims who may not get justice because of one thing or another. My friend is working through her guilt. I think things will turn out okay for them.
posted by
word.smith
on October 2, 2005 at 6:07 PM
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Word,
My God! This is an outrage! I'm so sorry this happened to her. I hope they pursue prosecution and I hope your friend doesn't feel guilt for not stopping her daughter from going out with "friends." Unfortunately, things happen for a reason. Maybe your friends daughter will grow up to be a rape counselor or something of the sort. Again, I'm so sorry this happened and I hope they are all doing okay. 
posted by
SpitFire70
on October 2, 2005 at 3:46 AM
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Telly, they are getting counselling.
posted by
word.smith
on October 1, 2005 at 10:51 PM
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This is such a damn tragic tale. I hope your friend and her daughter get into counseling about this, so the healing part can start.
posted by
telynor
on October 1, 2005 at 9:17 PM
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Medusa,
I agree with you. I think it's a hard job raising a daughter and we parents do need to keep a steady eye on our kids. They can be led astray so easily. I think the family will come through okay.
posted by
word.smith
on October 1, 2005 at 9:20 AM
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Symphony
Thanks for reading. Parenting is such that we learn from people day by day. Hopefully, we can use their experiences to some extent, to avoid the pitfalls that are out there.
posted by
word.smith
on October 1, 2005 at 9:18 AM
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Cass, I think they'll make it.
They're a close knit family and very supportive of each other.
posted by
word.smith
on October 1, 2005 at 9:17 AM
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Hi word.smith.......sad story...
I'm not even a parent, but I have a lot of young cousins and I worry about their growing up, especially the young girls. Tough to raise a daughter, I can only imagine. Parents have got to be more vigilant. I sincerely hope the young girl and her mom are both weathering this storm as well as they can.
posted by
MedusaNextDoor
on October 1, 2005 at 8:15 AM
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How awful...I am sorry for your friends daughter and her family...
heartbreaking...
....take care
posted by
_Symphony_
on October 1, 2005 at 4:33 AM
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What a dreadful thing to happen! I hope she can overcome and recover with the help of her family.
posted by
Ca88andra
on September 30, 2005 at 7:29 PM
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Lisa, thanks for reading.
Sounds like you had it tough too..That's the best they can do - concentrate on the healing process. They have each other's support so they should be okay over time.
posted by
word.smith
on September 30, 2005 at 1:48 PM
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So sorry to hear about your friend's daughter...
I do hope she heals from this experience...unfortunately it doesn't sound like much has changed over the years. I remember in my experience, when I got to safety, a friend poured me a drink, and even with just a few sips, the police were saying there was not much they could do...until he attacked a minor...then they wanted to see if I'd help them. Our system isn't always just, so tell her, do all that she can to heal, and hopefully justice will be served in some way. Can't avoid those "Natural Laws"...karma catches up.
Thanks for the post, and again good luck and best wishes to your friend and her family.
posted by
LifeByLisa
on September 30, 2005 at 1:36 PM
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Lensman, go right ahead.
As I said in the post, sometimes kids just don't understand that all parents are trying to do is protect them - not cramp their style. I hope this helps. What suprized me about this whole thing is that the boy is younger than her. You wonder how and why he's so hot for sex at his age. I just hope he doesn't graduate to bigger things and I think it will happen if he gets away with this.
posted by
word.smith
on September 30, 2005 at 12:50 PM
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Hi Word.Smith
Yikes, that's a cautionary tale. I have a 13-year-old niece who's showing signs of rebellion and resistance to her parents' wishes. I should print off this post, with your approval, and let them read it out to her. Not that I think she would deliberately go out looking for trouble, but it might help her to know that it can sometimes find her on its own unless she's cautious and forewarned about certain things. Good post
posted by
Lensman
on September 30, 2005 at 12:27 PM
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Strat,
I wonder why it is that some of us feel the need to force our will on other people.
posted by
word.smith
on September 30, 2005 at 12:17 PM
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Hem,
That's true. She's a good kid. Just an ordinary 16 y/o She just gave in to peer pressure, I guess. She is seeing a counsellor and the parents are still hoping that the police can lay charges.
I know, I think it's time to get rid of that eye..
posted by
word.smith
on September 30, 2005 at 12:16 PM
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Cosy,
They have weekly counselling, so that will help. Now I know her dad would love to do the boy some bodily harm, but that would just make things worse.
posted by
word.smith
on September 30, 2005 at 12:00 PM
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Quirky,
I have her on IM now and they are both doing these past few days.
posted by
word.smith
on September 30, 2005 at 11:58 AM
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Castration is not enough for those bastards.
posted by
strat
on September 30, 2005 at 11:35 AM
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word--
When these kinds of things happen, it's a reminder of how unfair life can be. I hope the girl met with a rape counselor and that in fact, it is possible to get the police to do something--or take it to the District Attorney. Alcohol or not, rape is rape!
p.s.-- That blinking eye is really creepy.
posted by
Hemlocker
on September 30, 2005 at 10:53 AM
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wordsmith
I just filled with goosebumps
...I swore that the same would never happen to my son...and if it did...I'd probably lose it and kill the person. I don't know what is there to say to bring consolation...I don't think the consolation exists...she must leave it in God's hands...hugs~
posted by
cosy
on September 30, 2005 at 9:55 AM
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word.--
that's very sad...I hope the mother can find a way to release her guilt though...and I pray for the emotional recovery of both her and her daughter.
posted by
Julia.
on September 30, 2005 at 9:38 AM
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