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Terpgirl30, yep I am quite practical too and I am not into seeing adults sulk so I don't indulge it too much.
I must say I do appreciate your comments. I feel as if I have received a letter and I feel inadequate to respond in full partly because it is enough just to think about some of the things that commenters raise and secondly that if I blog I am stealing time from the things I must do.
posted by
Azur
on May 22, 2005 at 7:01 PM
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Mayb,
I somehow don't think you've settled down with a plumber, unless he can quote long passages from your favorite books. My boyfriend has a much more practical side than I do, but he's also very sentimental.
posted by
Blanche.
on May 22, 2005 at 3:47 PM
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Straightforward, I realize you are commenting to my later post. I think more people should listen and read between the lines. Imagine if more people did that with ordinary Iraqis? Then things might be very different
posted by
Azur
on May 22, 2005 at 2:23 PM
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You have a point there, but the question is if you are trying to give an
overview of what's happening all over, then that's where the feasibility of meeting people in different parts of the world in person arises. perhaps what we can do is listen (as in try and read between the lines) carefully and maybe more interviews would help in this exercise. Just my two cents!
posted by
Straightforward
on May 22, 2005 at 8:44 AM
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symphony-- just so long as he is happy for you to write ..lol
posted by
Azur
on May 22, 2005 at 4:02 AM
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LOL.....
that was very thought-provoking.....***not to self, look for a nice man who is a plumber***
posted by
_Symphony_
on May 22, 2005 at 3:55 AM
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offbeatpub, it seemed a good idea at the time --lol
posted by
Azur
on May 22, 2005 at 3:44 AM
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Well MayB
What were you thinking? LOL...
posted by
Offy
on May 22, 2005 at 3:33 AM
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Ariala, sometimes I wonder why I ever married at all. It would have made me no less happy or unhappy and I would still be here
posted by
Azur
on May 22, 2005 at 3:28 AM
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MysticGmekeepr, yes you are blessed. I am too actually, my creative does household stuff well.
posted by
Azur
on May 22, 2005 at 3:27 AM
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Littlemsempickles, even two creatives can be very different I think, each can be practical about something and pathetic about something else. If you can be pathetic about different things you might just make it
posted by
Azur
on May 22, 2005 at 3:25 AM
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Tapsel_T, you mean exceptional plumbers?
posted by
Azur
on May 22, 2005 at 3:23 AM
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zentropa, I think that a lot of people don't allow themselves to accept that it's OK to have a life which mixes the practical and the creative. It is often perceived as failure to stick to a job but indulge in serious leisure such as the arts and yet it suggests a life of balance.
posted by
Azur
on May 22, 2005 at 3:23 AM
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tigerprincess, I understand ---even knowing about the risks is sometimes not enough to prepare you for them
posted by
Azur
on May 22, 2005 at 3:20 AM
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or Ca88andra, the children wear ill-matched un-ironed clothes
posted by
Azur
on May 22, 2005 at 3:19 AM
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Creative people also have incredibly tolerant children who learn not to ask when dinner will be on the table or when their clothes will be washed, but figure out how to get it all done themselves...
posted by
Ca88andra
on May 21, 2005 at 8:20 PM
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That's the only thing
that keeps me from quitting my day job and diving head first into freelancing becuase the only thing I wouldn't appreciate would be the unperdictable income, and this is the first time in three years that my husband and I have both had regular paychecks at the same time.
posted by
tigerprincess
on May 21, 2005 at 8:12 PM
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To be really honest, these last two entries give me a lot of reason not to give up my day job. I'm an IT who spends his spare time writing and acting. I don't think I can be pidgeonholed into being either a creative or a practical person. But the only way that I have ever made any money is by being practical, and I don't think that's going to change soon.
posted by
zentropa
on May 21, 2005 at 6:38 PM
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MayB - some interesting thoughts here although, I do believe that there are exceptions to the rule. LOL
posted by
TAPS.
on May 21, 2005 at 6:28 PM
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mayb - an interesting post
though I'm not sure I agree with it a 100% - but then not being a "creative" type myself, maybe I don;t have the background to voice my opinion! I do know though, from personal experience that it is better not to have similar personality types for a happy relationship. Sure, you need some common threads but if you are too similar then as you mentioned, the low times are extremely low and the high times are fantastic. In a partnership you need someone whose strengths not only that you can draw and learn from but you also need to provide strengths that the other can also benefit from. Life and living - always an interesting adventure!
posted by
littlemspickles
on May 21, 2005 at 2:56 PM
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MayB
...now how about a cement contractor who doesn't mind sweeping the floor or emptying the dishwasher, paying for a housekeeper... or taking me out to dinner. Am I blessed or not? Grateful too
posted by
MysticGmekeepr
on May 21, 2005 at 2:26 PM
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Plan C: don't get married and run like the dickens if he/she is a creative
type!
posted by
Ariala
on May 21, 2005 at 2:23 PM
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My Husband is an IT
It may come from the fact he thinks (at age 41), a high fashion photographer is waiting inside his body, but he's waaaaay more PMS like than me. I may offend PMS people, and I don't mean to. We're all friends here, and it's the only description I have. Wait, now I know how I have that. He worked as an IT for an international company in Boston (I'm in Baltimore.). He roomed with a female friend who took me aside (after we were married) and said living with him was like living with someone in a terminal state of PMS.
You're creative, but because you sell to periodicals/newspapers, you have to have some serious practical genes as well. That's how we sell things. Otherwise, we'd all just be writing all the time, and move on to the next thing.
Two novelists together are no better than two actors. It should be that you root for the other person. I think I have that personality, but I'm not sure that's normal. Most writers/actors take peaks at the other person's paper as a way of getting an idea of how good they are. I guess it's a good thing that I don't care. I give leads to my writer friends. My feeling has always been if my stuff is good, and it's better than yours, the editor will take my stuff. If yours is better, it's meant to be there, and I have to work harder. Thinning the field isn't good for me, and I hate to see people with that mentality.
MayB---you strike me that you have a very even keel ego, as do I. This is my best life skill, like any life skill. I envy doctors and cops personally, but these are the skills God gave me, and I figure he'll take me where he needs to take me. If that means my husband becomes more successful, well, that's what it means. I hope I'm secure enough to deal with it.
Back to my husband. He's the one that made fun of my cover letter way back when---the one that keeps getting me all the phone calls. Still, when he needs his stuff looked at, I get the document. So I think there is a bit of that creative rivalry going on, even though we are not in the same fields.
I can bolster a loved one (as I was telling you in a former post about why you are selling and your husband may not be now)...but if I had to deal with envy on my part or his, I'm not sure I could do it. I hate sulking when it comes to writing. I have enough in my real life to sulk about at times (as do you). I don't have time to sulk about things in my imaginary/creative life. I don't deal well with those who do.
Yours sounds more like you really believe in your husband and don't get why your stuff takes off and his doesn't. It's apples and oranges as we've talked about. Ours is the tortoise game. He's in the hare range. He'll go from zero to 60 when you have your head turned.
I'm just giving empathy here because to be honest, I have no idea how to keep this sort of thing level. My brother is an electrician (now a GM of our concert hall...but still fixing cars and everyone's electricity). There's something to be said for that. Again...THAT I envy. He told me he will never install a ceiling fan for me again. He's done enough that I should be teaching the class---but, of course, I can't. I feel inadequate for that. THAT makes me moody. I hate to ask help for normal stuff.
Kim
posted by
terpgirl30
on May 21, 2005 at 2:23 PM
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MayB
That is the plight of every creative/intelligent mind. We are so very narcissistic - we will only mate with those that are a reflection of ourselves.
posted by
Transcendental_Child
on May 21, 2005 at 2:18 PM
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Plan A is better
Marry a good housekeeper, leave a mess, and suffer the Housekeeper's Revenge.
"Honey! Where's my first draft?!"
posted by
majroj
on May 21, 2005 at 1:11 PM
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LOL! A Squalid Mess???
Have you been peeking through the windows?
posted by
Passionflower
on May 21, 2005 at 11:30 AM
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Ha MayB!
Excellent, though difficult points! Yours is a life of extreme highs and extreme lows I'm guessing...with the mundane rarely rearing its head. I've sort of been there..when me and mine were in business together (a business requiring loads of creativity) and while the highs were fantastic, the other parts..waiting for work, etc. were low times. And very true about the housekeeper! I often thing I could produce more if I wasn't so bloody obsessed with housework! Hang in there..the highs are around the corner...I'm hoping for ya!
posted by
ginnieb
on May 21, 2005 at 11:20 AM
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