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- Go to Lady Kenobi made me remember Viet Nam......and I don't want to.
Temple, your comment filled me with such joy and sorrow. I wrote a post for
you and others who have been so supportive of me. I hope to be able to support you and your billy boy during your coming time so very , very far apart. I had two sons in the Navy during the first Desert Storm and so I will be able to identify with you and your love during this coming time.
I don't want him to go there, either and yet understand that the military personnel must do their duty. I wanted my boys to be hippie children and they picked up arms and joined the Navy instead. We cannot control life and I dislike that more than these words can communicate it to you.
posted by
benzinha
on April 18, 2004 at 1:31 AM
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I just need to say this, forgive me while I gush.
Abuelita, I am just in love with you. Your patience, your color, your diplomacy, your spirit. There is a warmth about you that transcends this cold, pale, emotionless medium. I told my boy, who I can now say is billy_cargo (we were hiding), that one day I would meet you because how could I not meet someone like you. He goes to Iraq in 3 weeks, Abuelita, out of the blue. I'm trying to write about it now, but we just found out and I can't really get through it. I understand Moondawg's sensitiviity to this issue, but I think his comment could have been handled with some more reserve having not known the facts on you. Thank you for all your wonderful writing and support. I've gotten protective of you, see...just an instinct I guess. I don't think Iraq and Viet Nam are fundamentally different. Right now, all I can see is that I was to be spending part of my summer in Iceland and fall in Tennessee, now I have to wait until around November to see him. It's all for a war I don't agree with, nor does he, and that I don't understand. Please always keep putting it out there. Your life and conviction and stories and words bring me comfort. Thank you thank you. I send you work enough to build your studio, food enough to fill your belly, and peace enough to nourish your soul and swell your creative spirit. You are truly a blessing. Okay, end of gushfest. ;)
posted by
Temple
on April 16, 2004 at 8:11 PM
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AuntiK, I worship all vets, even those who failed to live up to their own
ideal of what a good soldier would do. It's the most f'd up job on earth and they all deserve the nation's thanks for getting in the way of land mines and bullets and for having their young idealistic heads messed with by their unexpected suffering.
They are all heroes in my book and I just wish that I had a magic healing hand to put on their foreheads and erase all of the pain that may be there inside of them. What a grandmother's hand that would be. My dad told us stories that curled our hair. From Viet Nam, where he went as a civilian into fighting territory. He trained Navy Carrier fighter pilots to land on them, an easy, very scary job, he said.
We agree here, wonderfully refreshing.
posted by
benzinha
on April 15, 2004 at 12:55 PM
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I wish we didn't have to have any war, period....
there is no such thing as a "good war". I always give special thanks to a Vietnam vet when I meet one.
posted by
LadyKenobi
on April 15, 2004 at 12:40 PM
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moondawg, I don't know where to start to answer you, but will try.
There are many wonderful stories about Viet Nam, about soldiers who spent all of their off time doing as much good as possible to re-build some of the damage incurred. Just before he died of kidney failure, from residual Agent Orange problems, another dear friend from highschool , a Brown River Rat, told us some good and some sad stories, opening up to a few old classmates. Some people talk about life and some don't. You say that you don't, not even to your wife. Many police officers here in the good ol USA don't either. I understand.
I do not wish to perpetuate the idea that all American soldiers in Viet Nam were dope using baby killers. Those who think this of their troops are sorely mistaken. But, some stories, undigestible as they may be, are true. The friend who told me this story HAD spent most of his time in Saigon working in supplies, am I also not allowed to say that there was a black market that he was pushed into participating in, under threats?
He had a child with a lovely Cambodian woman, whom he passed on to be cared for by his replacement there and she had another child, the next soldiers. Can I not say that either? That this formed a small, soul deep hole in his heart after communications with her broke down, never being able to later find this lovely woman and his son? Should we never speak of that aspect of the war, because it is unpalatable?
I am the kind of person who gets told deep secrets and I don't know why, except to say that I am known as open and non-judgemental and understanding.
This friend was more often sober for years at a time, doing wonderful good things in the community, not just an addict, not his only definition. We were sitting on a beach in Mexico, sober, watching a fire in the sand, talking about his son and he began to cry and tell me this story. Because he worked in supplies, this rare combat experience, he was only attached to this group temporarily, three months, this experience rocked him to the core, as he never understood the need of it. The Sarge was not an addict, did not participate in the drugging and drinking, just did his best to keep them all alive. The lieutenant was so freshly out of officer's training school, so clueless. A tragedy all around. They all rarely used drugs on the trails, on patrol, knowing that this would be what would kill them, removing their 'edge'. They were on a three day 'rest'.
Iraq will be different as you say, but the news article about Afghanistan told of present unhappiness there, with officers. The troops in Afghanistan are beginning to feel as the Russian troops there felt, full of despair and it is not being addressed by higher ups.
I apologize to you for making you feel that I was just casually telling a mythical tale, lightly, a lie invented by a person who felt the need to 'colorize' his boring service in Viet Nam. I knew this man before he left, wrote to him the whole time that he was gone, and knew him for decades after his return. We were very close. When I gave him his very large box of letters from Viet Nam to re-read, about seven years before his death, we cried together over their details and laughed over their funny incidents. He took them home to read alone first, a painful experience for him, bringing it all back. We went to Mexico to fish sat and talked on that beach after he had read them all.
posted by
benzinha
on April 15, 2004 at 11:51 AM
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Careful of your sources,
of the millions of soldiers that served in Vietnam only a small percentage of them were in actuall combat. The majority were in the rear areas as support units.
Many of what is called in the military as clerks and jerks, have told all kinds of stories about horrible things that went on in combat to cover the fact that they spent the war behind a typewriter and that the only action they saw was an occassional mortor or rocket attack, and some actually recieved purple hearts for injuring themselves while trying to get into bunkers during these attacks. Usually drunk.
Yes there were many things that took place in Vietnam that should not have, but it's stories like this one that gives the impression to the American public that the Vietnam Veterans were nothing but a bunch of dope using baby killers.
I think what I find revealing is that you would be trusted with this information. My ex wife was never made privy to anything that happened over there by me. I don't see the sense in dwelling on that past with others that could not possibly understand the reality.
Iraq will be far different, because the circumstances are very different. If you don't know what I mean I suggest that you do some research about how these two wars differ in the way they are conducted.
You did a good job of relating the tale. But I am inclined to feel that that is what it was, a story from a mind ravished by an addiction.
Drug use in my area was minimal and usually lead to you being left behind to burn the shit at the fire base, because I would sooner have a green leutenant lead me than have some zonked out druggy watching my back. Than you for your time
posted by
Moondawg
on April 15, 2004 at 10:24 AM
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Anytime, B. :)
posted by
Temple
on April 15, 2004 at 2:35 AM
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Thank you very much Temple. Your support is greatly appreciated.
Naw, the fellows don't want to tell these stories, they want them to disappear from their brains and leave them in peace. I was amazed at my friend's trust in me, telling me this. True story.
I have another vet story of my girlfriend's boyfriend, but won't do two in a row as they are hard to take......
posted by
benzinha
on April 15, 2004 at 2:30 AM
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or bear it, rather, not get nekkid ;)
posted by
Temple
on April 15, 2004 at 2:28 AM
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beachbelle, I was reminded of this story by a news article on the
dissatisfaction of American troops in Afghanistan, with their officers, with their lack of expertise and poor directions and dangerous decisions and actions and orders.
posted by
benzinha
on April 15, 2004 at 2:25 AM
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Hush Ukie
This is an amazing and powerful story, Abuelita. When you write here, you write for you and we are lucky enough to come along for the ride. It's not about rank. This is so sad, too. Your friend confessed all this to you? That war just ruined his life. I wonder in 15 years what we will hear about Iraq. I think this might be a great one to flush out down the line for your book. If you can bare it. I'm so sorry that your friend suffered like that. My mind doesn't want to believe that these boys would turn on each other like that. Imagine how many other stories are out there like this? This would be an amazing collection of essays if you could find others to talk. Or, once again, to bare it. Thank you for sharing this with us.
posted by
Temple
on April 15, 2004 at 2:24 AM
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ukie, I just went to read your donut and Santa Fe posts and they were as
long, taken together. No, I can't shorten it, as I've kept to the actual facts of his story and feel that I need all of the enclosed details to tell it. Sorry......that you found it too long.
posted by
benzinha
on April 15, 2004 at 2:22 AM
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can you shorten it?
...the story is a bit long...
: )
posted by
QuailNest
on April 15, 2004 at 2:16 AM
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Very disturbing. There is no easy way of dealing with such things.
posted by
beachbelle
on April 15, 2004 at 2:13 AM
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ukie, I don't understand your comment. Sorry........
posted by
benzinha
on April 15, 2004 at 2:07 AM
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This is not my usual kind of a story and its a bit of a shocker, but these
stories and others like them are part of what formed my opinions on war and friendship and drugs and suffering and on what I visualize as a true hell on earth. They are the reason why I have PEACE stickers all over my van's bumpers.
posted by
benzinha
on April 15, 2004 at 2:05 AM
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how
short?
posted by
QuailNest
on April 15, 2004 at 2:03 AM
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