michmak77 life story project for me to b heard

Saturday, April 24, 2010

the hubby

my husband asked to read my blog. I read it to him. he ended up telling me it wasn't true. I hurt his feeling. I warned him that he wouldn't like it. he insisted so I read it too him. Don't ask if you don't really want to know how I feel. he told me he could have what's her name back anytime. that... Sign in to see full entry.

Monday, April 12, 2010

why all the ???

I have realized your scared of losing me. The one person that has made sure u have gotten everything you ever wanted. and didn't have to work most of the time cause I would bust my *ss and work lots of 16 hrs shifts. I was never home I was always at work. At one point the girls thought mommy didnt... Sign in to see full entry.

a new day

I am sorry I havent been posting. I had a major meltdown. Still not sure about hubby. My Therapist says divorce isnt an option. I said hello have u met me. Cause my sanity is on the line here.. I'm tired of being told I'm a B*tch, lazy, and that my meds arent working. Well I just started meds 3wks (... Sign in to see full entry.

Friday, March 26, 2010

Today has made me realize what I want.

I want to be HAPPY!!!!! I have realize that I am a very caring person, the type that would give u the shirt off there back. I saw just how selfish and child like my husband was today. I saw that my husband only cares for himself and no one else. my children are very caring. I think I finally saw who... Sign in to see full entry.

New memory

I am in the sitting room jumping on the couch, holding on to my mom. My mom,dad and grandma are yelling. Dad's saying your not f*cking taking her out of this house. You can visit her anytime here. Grandma's yelling why do u even deserve to see her. Mom's yelling Stay the f*ck out of this b*tch. My... Sign in to see full entry.

She gave us away or so I thought.

My mom hit major wall the day arthur got hurt. This was what all three dad's needed to gain custody of there said child(ren). The dad's took her to court, After arthurs's dad won, MY mom signed her rights to me away to my dad. along with her two older children to their dad. My mom hightailed it... Sign in to see full entry.

.- next part of homeward bound

I only know this portion of my life from hears say. ( from other family members.) My dad move back in with my grandma after he almost killed my mom. He let her have visitations. She decided to move to florida with a man whom she was cheating on my dad with. Before she moved my brother(half) and I... Sign in to see full entry.

Monday, March 15, 2010

my apologies

I am sorry I haven't been posting lately. I hit a major low over the last few day. It made me physically ill. I hate having a mental disorder. I hate being depressed. I have so many days that I miss out on with my family, because of this illness. It was recently brought to my attention that my... Sign in to see full entry.

Monday, March 8, 2010

homeward bound

In the weeks leading up to my release from the hospital, my parents were taught how to feed me. How to check my monitors. I had a heart monitor and oxygen while I was sleeping. I would stop breathing several times over a few short months due to a faulty monitor. The last time I stop breathing,my mom... Sign in to see full entry.

back to my memories

Ok I'm gonna back up. July 27,1977. I this is the day I decided I was comng out. My mother was only 7mos. I wasn't suppose to grace their presence for another two months. My mom's grandpa past away a few days earlier in another state. She was also a high risk pregnancy. I have two brothers and one... Sign in to see full entry.

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