https://www.blogit.com/Blogs/Blog.aspx/helmetcheese/Shoot me.hourly12000-01-01T12:00+00:00https://www.blogit.com/Blogs/Blog.aspx/helmetcheese/644309I hope I am there on the day of your death To watch your fat face gasping for breath I hope I am there to witness your stroke. So I can laugh loud out loud and make a fat joke. You are a gigantic bag of shit and fat, You have bulges in places which should be flat Even your eyeballs stick out of...https://www.blogit.com/Blogs/Blog.aspx/helmetcheese/635047Thanks for buying from me Oh wonderful eBay buyer. And thanks for the positive feedback. But you really didn’t have to mention That you bought a similar item elsewhere Which had free postage and packaging. I mean really, are you that concerned Over forty nine friggin’ pence difference? And by the...https://www.blogit.com/Blogs/Blog.aspx/helmetcheese/634928Hello friend, I own three dogs, two of which are bitches. Yet none of them, even though they are only eight months old - and we have five cats living here also - spend all day in my garden barking their tits off and irritating the living snot out of everyone else in the neighbourhood. The reason...https://www.blogit.com/Blogs/Blog.aspx/helmetcheese/453994Fifteen British sailors strayed into Iranian waters. Fourteen male crew and one woman. It doesn't take a genius to work out who was reading the map.https://www.blogit.com/Blogs/Blog.aspx/helmetcheese/450350It's Mother's Day in England today. Dedicated to you, my mother. Thanks for not making it apparent that you knew I was using the hoover to masturbate with when you walked into my bedroom that time. Looking back now, it was pretty obvious I wasn't hoovering my cupboard out at all and perhaps, maybe...https://www.blogit.com/Blogs/Blog.aspx/helmetcheese/354683Oh Gargage Man, Oh bastard, bastard Garage Man. I hate you, and I hate your family Those who spawned you should be brought back to life, so I could shoot them in the face and genitalia regions, just to make sure your greasy hands could definitely never fix another car ever again. And by fix I...https://www.blogit.com/Blogs/Blog.aspx/helmetcheese/335175Here is a song I'm dedicating to my 1997 Ford Escort Bastard-mobile. It kind of sums up my feelings towards it. Or maybe it doesn't. (CHOIR BOY): Oh Escort Every day, I hate you Oh Escort, Every day, I want to kill you, ooo-oooh...... You can dance, you can drive, Having the time of your life,...