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Bless you, Katray.
posted by
lovelyladymonk
on October 9, 2016 at 3:56 PM
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Katray
The story, real-life experiences of the pains you have gone through must also not have gone waste without your gaining something ... They do make you a strong and resilient woman, as is evident from your writings. 
posted by
anib
on October 5, 2016 at 9:23 PM
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Women independence is an interesting important powwerful issue in lives love.
posted by
BC-A
on October 3, 2016 at 9:50 AM
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You have done a great job bringing to life your mother with your words.
posted by
FormerStudentIntern
on October 3, 2016 at 9:47 AM
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I wholeheartedly thank all of you
for the overwhelmingly kind, caring and in depth comments and ideas.
Things are still hectic and I'm battling early season allergies, but will hopefully be back to stay for awhile and catch up here soon. Ted, she still wants to go dancing but her docs want to be sure she won't experience dizziness or weakness while moving around quickly and in varied ways or positions; she's had a few wobbly moments. And TAPS, you are blessed indeed with the parents you had - if physical blows and confinement had not been inflicted by my mother over the years, I've wondered if the effects from her explosions of rabid cursing and name calling, the countless times of tearing down of my worth, etc. would have faded to a degree of me feeling somewhat blessed with the mother I got; well I'll never know the answer to that. 
posted by
Katray2
on October 3, 2016 at 8:32 AM
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Well Kat you are now together again, Some daughters I know never even speak to their mothers. I wonder what your Mother's childhood was like? Of course drink is a terrible thing to be inflicted with, although the sympathy should be towards to you. I know though that you will not regret bringing normality back into Mum's life, Although it does take a special person to be so forgiving. I hope your poetry helps. 
posted by
C_C_T
on October 3, 2016 at 6:39 AM
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I admire you for your tenacity to love inspite of your hurt emotions. Relationships sometimes are difficult but it is something workable I believe. 
posted by
shobana
on October 3, 2016 at 5:28 AM
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Your poem full of sweet emotions. Mothers are always a special thing Thanks for sharing.
posted by
Chuck_E_Ibrahim
on October 3, 2016 at 4:09 AM
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Reading this post of your difficulties through life reminds me how blessed I was to have the parents that I did. Not perfect, no parents are, but I can say how precious they were rather than complain and that is blessed indeed.
posted by
TAPS.
on October 2, 2016 at 7:37 PM
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Linking with the source of Shalom and wholesomeness/completeness
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N2pAaJuMwyI
posted by
NocrossJustchristmas
on October 2, 2016 at 7:15 PM
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I admire your courage to tell your story unfiltered and share the sorrows and heartache of a parental Love gone terribly wrong, but I commend your growth through the pain. There were many young people with the same circumstances as were yours when growing up so tragically and they didn't make it through Yes, you are a strong survivor and an exceptional person! I pray for your families continued healing and forgiveness of each other! Thank You for sharing your story with Us...
posted by
pendorin
on October 2, 2016 at 6:54 PM
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Katray; only Jesus can break generational curses. U are a mighty tower
of a woman, having served as a shield to your brother. Like the others here, we thank you for trusting us with your pain and hopes. I will pray for you, Mom, and entire family. Kindly consider emailing me Mom's first name, and/or of your brother. Write ---erite--write, and even tape your talks with Mom. Many NPR stations may now - or later times - use tales of courage, etc. Just a possible value to recording Mom's own accounts. My dad was abused; and he became an abuser. Later he made up for that in many ways. My mom died at age 65 ...she protected us kids like the Biblical Mother Hen (Jesus). Listen to songs by GAITHER VOCAL BAND & choose one Mom would like. She smile at one or two- I can gurantee it. Shalom, shalom: ask her to say "Jesus Paid for Every Sin of those who Call On His Name." amen
posted by
NocrossJustchristmas
on October 2, 2016 at 6:01 PM
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She wants to dance, let her dance.
****
posted by
teddypoet52
on October 2, 2016 at 4:31 PM
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She wants to dance, let her dance.
****
posted by
teddypoet52
on October 2, 2016 at 4:31 PM
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Katray2
It is with heartfelt sympathy and concurrent happiness, however contradictory that may sound, that I read this post and beautiful poem. Rather than a lengthy dissertation from me, I will merely say thank you for sharing so much of your life's pain, and for being able to tell your mom you love her. I am glad you made peace with her, and with your feelings toward her. Also, I am sorry for all you have suffered; you are a Survivor. Congratulations on that very difficult achievement. And now, dear lady, you can say goodbye to your mother, knowing there will be no regret for not saying what needed to be said, and for loving her as best you could. My favorite saying is: "Do not leave this earth with your words still inside of you." And you have just proven one can do that! Bless you, and your family.
posted by
Sea_Gypsy
on October 2, 2016 at 2:22 PM
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what to say darling. Your mother was horrible to you as a child. I am so sorry. There does however come a time first when you don't forgive but you grow up and take control of your life. I believe you have been there all the time I have been reading and communicating with you. probably you were pretty much grown up when you were sixteen.
I would say that she loves you. Don't worry about the food trays two years ago. The main thing was that she was trying to show her love and wanted to keep you living.
Sometimes it is too late to be loved by a child. maybe that is some of her determined independence. I am like that I know. I don't have daughter so I refuse to have a daughter in law telling her friends that she is burdened with caring for me. Possibly she knows she doesn't deserve you to take care of her and remains that strong independent person determined soul that she always has been.
I think she is very blessed to still have you in her life and if the two of you can find grounds to work on your relationship then bless you both.
posted by
Kabu
on October 2, 2016 at 2:21 PM
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