I found ecstasy in Vermont > Comments on MEMORIES OF DEE: Who's paying for the chicken?

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Re: v1 Jeansaw, thanks for reading.

I think I can plan a full retirement now, once I collect my Blogit earnings! Thanks

for the ''honest'' comment--regarding the last one. I like good feedback like that. I do

have a travel post ready; I just have to polish it up a little. Have a good night and I

hope I didn't offend you with the Dee series.

posted by Vermont01 on June 23, 2015 at 6:10 PM | link to this | reply

v1

about these stories, i agree with all the comments that have been made here. this could have been an exercise in knowing ones self, writing is an excellent way of doing that.  someone once said "an unexamined life is not worth living".  put these away and a few years from now take them out and read them and i think you might just wonder if it was really you that wrote them.

if you are going to try and make money with writing, then i suggest you stick to your travel posts, i think they are awsome and they make me feel i am traveling down the road with you.  find what you are really good at and work on it and stick to it.  we cant all be good at everything.

posted by overtherainbow on June 23, 2015 at 4:01 PM | link to this | reply

Well thank you for being honest V. Although it does seem that a serious future involvement would have come up against this tangle over money. I think a rift would have deepened very quickly. I think the cat would have turned up again like a bad penny. 

posted by C_C_T on June 1, 2015 at 7:23 AM | link to this | reply

VT01

Well...I'd say it depends on what you're going for.  I mean, I found it humorous in small doses but I was laughing at you (as a woman).  I'm sure there are men who might agree with you and be cheering you on.  But, frankly, it became such a theme that it seemed, to me, that you might have a bit of an issue and it did get old.  I think there is definitely an audience for reading about your dating experiences....but I'd go much lighter on the money issues as there is just more to a relationship, don't you think?  If you feel so strongly about it because of a bad experience, maybe you might tell your readers about that experience in detail; it never hurts to share your vulnerabilities.  Then lightly touching on the money thing in future encounters would be more understandable.

Honestly, you've painted a picture of a likable but somewhat shallow young man who came from a good family and is sowing wild oats and may be heading toward getting his stuff together career-wise,...but is a real turkey when it comes to women.  You might not turn off immature young male readers and misogynistic older male readers....but I think most women would probably be more irritated than entertained after too many tales, wondering if you cared about anything beyond who paid the bill and how much she weighed....and if you looked at your own actions as judgmentally as you did hers.  You don't sound like you like women all that much - but you have sisters?  Did they torture you or something?LOL!  

I suggest you read back through your stories and try to read them through thinking about how you would feel if you were a woman reading them.....would you feel like this author thought much of women?  Respected them?  If not, does he write with passion about them at least? With romance?  Women readers need something to like - humor that isn't too much at their expense....passion....romance.....or more human interest - like stuff about your childhood/family/work/etc.

Finally....will you PLEASE use spell check!  If you are serious about writing for submission you must do something as simple as running it through that simple "ABC" in the upper left corner.  I'm being brutal VT because I've begged you about this, teased you about this (of coarse) and now you've asked me publicly so I'm rapping your knuckles - use the damn spell checker!!!!!!!  The misspellings are just too distracting ......and unprofessional.

All that said.....kudos to you for having the gumption to write something to submit....and I do enjoy your stories, and thank you for having patience with my yammering at you and I applaud your guts to seek opinions.  There are several on here, however, who are much better "editors" and I encourage you to seek multiple opinions because, as they say, "different strokes.....". 

posted by Krisles on May 31, 2015 at 9:17 PM | link to this | reply

Re:Krisles

 Thank you, for your comment. Now, I look at you as one of Blogits editors. So, I

 guess it's fair to say, that type of material would not attract a larger reading

 audience down the road? It may sound funny but I'm serious.

posted by Vermont01 on May 31, 2015 at 6:01 PM | link to this | reply

Vt

I agree with Krisles - there was just too much niggling over money going on in that relationship...I say 'was' since I assume it's a thing well in the past...

posted by Nautikos on May 31, 2015 at 4:16 PM | link to this | reply

Vermont

  "Would it have been better to say something like ''you're nuts and I really don't

  like you as a person. I want out''!

Yes, to me that would be called upright and straightforward. Had she paid for meals too???

posted by WileyJohn on May 31, 2015 at 1:33 PM | link to this | reply

Sorry, can't operate machinery well today obviously.......😜. I was just thinking..... I just realized that I find your attitude toward money and dating so ridiculous and outrageous because I was never like that even with just my friends (women) when we went out for drinks or dinner, or had dinner at each other's houses!  So I  would just naturally never stand it in a man.  I am a very open person and I just throw my money out there....could never stand to watch folks niggling over ever penny and won't deal with them...I'll just grab the check!  But that's just me!  I'm sure it's saved you lots of money over the years.  Different strokes for different folks.  Luckily, an open palm generally gets filled over and over....the old easy go, easy come principle of the universe.  Anyway, I'm sorry I've been so rough on you.🌸😘

posted by Krisles on May 31, 2015 at 11:06 AM | link to this | reply

VT01

I

posted by Krisles on May 31, 2015 at 10:51 AM | link to this | reply

I wonder what would happen if I was allergic to a girlfriend's pet. I myself do not have one...We can learn a lot about people from our conversations with them.

posted by FormerStudentIntern on May 31, 2015 at 10:14 AM | link to this | reply

not sure what to comment today. It is sad about the cat allergy. Mr. Graysome here is our owner as was his predecessor for me in Australia. i mean a human does come first but I am not sure that I could remove the cat. When you come up to see us we will put you up in a Motel so you don't have to suffer.

posted by Kabu on May 31, 2015 at 8:51 AM | link to this | reply

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