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Purple
None of what you just replied to me is what my intention was and I apologize that it seemed so to you. I wish you nothing but health and happiness....I know exactly what it is to live in an unhappy relationship and hope you can get out as soon as possible - just as I am getting out of advice giving as I obviously do it so poorly.
posted by
Krisles
on March 10, 2015 at 10:20 AM
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Re: Purple
So you believe I do not have the right to purchase furniture. I should just be a good wife and bow to him. He was also upset that I put my cell in my name. He was upset when I started working again, as I should just rest and get well. He was upset that I have been shopping for apartments. He gets upset when I do anything that says I am leaving.
To me these are gentle ways of tellling him the truth. You can not call 911 because you have a feeling.
I was right, this morning he was out of the house by 7. Normally he leaves at 8.
You call it taunting, I call it doing what I need to do to start a new life. If I do not have the right to do what I want, and be who I am, then that is not a marriage. It is a prison.
I am not very good at being a prisoner. I earn money as well. It just goes down the rabbit hole called alimony or what ever else he may be doing with it.
I for the most part have been handling this as peaceful as possible. I realize that if I were in his shoes I would be freightened too. But I do not have a secret life other than this blog.
posted by
Inside_The_Purple_Purse
on March 10, 2015 at 7:51 AM
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Re:
Joe really does not want me to leave, I want to leave. He has all control of our funds and believes that he can keep me here.
Yes I do see several Docs on a regular basis.
Thank you for your prayers.
posted by
Inside_The_Purple_Purse
on March 10, 2015 at 7:40 AM
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Purple
I really cannot add anything sensible to what Krisles has already said so well - I just wish you the best! 
posted by
Nautikos
on March 10, 2015 at 7:37 AM
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🌸Krisles seems to have a handle on this one from knowing others in similar situations. So I hope it’ll work out for you love. BC-A, Bill’s R🌸🌸st
posted by
BC-A
on March 10, 2015 at 7:19 AM
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This all very stressful but if Joe really wants you to leave, I would just try to carry on as normal and hope you can get the funds through. Do see your Doctor if you feel too poorly.
posted by
C_C_T
on March 10, 2015 at 1:15 AM
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Purple
You sound like an intelligent person...and you are journaling on a site where people give you feedback so I'm going to give you mine. I totally believe "walk a mile in my shoes" and I have never walked in shoes like yours but I have known many women who have walked in similar. All of us are our own worst enemy. You had no reason to buy that furniture and wave a flag in front of his face. I'm sure you can list 4-5 but none that constitute a true break from patterns and you are trying so valiantly to break patterns. And why would you taunt him with questions like are you going to be okay tonight....if that is a question for real, call the police. I'm just saying you are making a change....so, make changes in your behaviors with this man. You talk change...but you report actions and conversations that are not sounding that way. This is just an observation from an outsider who wishes you nothing but the best....and, therefore, is being truthful. I salute your bravery and am so sorry for your pain....and I will be sending strength your way.
posted by
Krisles
on March 9, 2015 at 7:31 PM
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